legal professionals

[Livia]

LOL!

Typical daily behavior for some of the odd ones:

Managing partner (I'm not his asst., but this is damn funny) - first one here - works for awhile and then goes jogging - may or may not change clothes immediately. He is covered in hair, like the missing link. There is a shower in the men's room - right across from his office. He will close his office door to change, sometimes leaving his skid-marked tighty whities in plain view on the floor for all to see. He'll work for awhile, then leave to go shopping for 3 bags of fruit. Then he'll stink up the office by re-heating last night's salmon leftovers in the microwave. Depending on which bug is up his ass that day, he will pace up and down the halls, ranting about how this and that needs to be done differently so the firm can save money.

Sr. partner #1 - Hates rush hour traffic, so he doesn't arrive until 9:30 or 10. Plays scrabble online and surfs the internet. Goes to lunch at 11:30 - more online playing - gives me work around 3:30 or 4 - and then he leaves around 4:30.

Sr. partner #2 - Usually here around 9 AM. Plays solitaire on his laptop all day while he's on the phone. Goes to lunch with Sr. partner #1. More solitaire and phone calls. Starts giving me work around 4 PM. His deadline for me to have his Brief done last week was noon on Friday. So he could go play golf. I had it done at 11:45 AM.

Lucifer - arrives around 9:30 or 10 AM. Walks around and socializes (annoys) everyone. Goes to lunch. Spends most of the afternoon on the phone or dictating letters and crap no one wants to receive or read.

Jr. Partner - arrives early - also a mid-day jogger. Showers and preens for over an hour. Simultaneously plays 2 hands of Texas Hold 'Em online - shops for Longhorn and Disney crap on ebay - dictates and talks on the phone in-between. He works very odd hours (comes in at 3 AM and weekends) and surprises his secretary with tons of tapes to transcribe when she arrives the next day. I'm the only one in the office who knows he just got his nipple pierced. He's super cool, and a great dad. He works those odd hours so he can spend time w/ his family.