An Emotional Life- Divorce, Emotions, and Past Relationships- A Mini Vent By: Ethan

[camchristo]

Originally Posted by carrie721

you're my favorite hoosier ever.

a mini suck-up by: carrie

uem.


a mini tantrum by: cammie

[carrie721]

Originally Posted by camchristo

uem.


a mini tantrum by: cammie

LOL.

i'm an idiot. i don't think of you as a hoosier unless i'm making fun of you for living in indiana.

you know i love you.

[sara1998]

Originally Posted by camchristo

uem.


a mini tantrum by: cammie

Hey, don't get all jealous and ****.

[sara1998]

Originally Posted by carrie721

you're my favorite hoosier ever.

a mini suck-up by: carrie

And, if I had to love a Buckeye, it would have to be you.

[sara1998]

Originally Posted by GODDESS6

well said & oh soooo true~

Originally Posted by Black_Moon

I wish you could hear people applauding you over the internet.

Originally Posted by Zombie

Not a hardened bitch. A realist. Also, well said.

Thanks guys.

Not trying to gang up, be a bitch (that's rarely seen) or seem insensitive. However, I have a problem with people who tend to be "needy" for attention.

[Ghost_Tracker]

"Alrighty" Ethan, well here's some thoughts.

This might be a little disjointed, but to be honest I don't have time to make it a work of art:

First up, realize that you're young. And the girl is young. You're human, she's human, mistakes are going to be made. If she's thinking anything at all it's probably "I wish I hadn't led him on."

Things work a certain way. They have for millions of years. But society has changed - a great deal. You seem to not understand the implications of that, especially when dealing with young people. I think that that's something you need to spend a great deal of time thinking about.

Also - and I'm not trying to be mean here - You strike me as someone who doesn't realize - or doesn't want to accept - that certain actions in social relationships have permanent consequences. Some of your language in this post may be a perfect example of that. You say, "AND I KNOW I WAS ANNOYING AS HELL" and then go on to ask those very same people that you've "annoyed" about this. As others have said, however, anyone who didn't want to read this thread didn't have to. But somehow, you seem to just not GET this, and I feel that it's very important that you do - -

SOME THINGS CAN NEVER, NEVER BE UNDONE.

I admit that's something that took me a long time to get, personally. But it's one of those "hard truths of life" that you have to accept if you're going to grow up.

One reason that it's very important that you "get" that is because some people have perceived your behavior towards some of these women - and that includes Stevie - as stalking. Ethan, this seems to be more of the same, at least to a point. And you have to be "very careful" in this day and age. COOL YOUR ENGINES. STOP TRYING TO FORCE THINGS. And that IS what you've continued to try to do, with a young woman who had already labelled you as a "Friend." I've said it before and I and MANY others will try to get this across to you again - once you're labelled as a "Friend," it's over.
That's almost ALWAYS true. And no, the friendship almost certainly can't be saved after it reaches that stage. Certainly when she told you that she's Not Interested, you made things much worse by continuing to pursue her; and that IS what you were doing and you knew it and she knew that you knew it.

Now, you're an intelligent person. You KNOW that the family issues you're going through are triggering this, or at least making it worse. You're feeling sentimental and nostalgic for a simpler past; and you're maybe feeling some pressure to get into a serious relationship because your home life is changing significantly. It's natural and normal to feel that way; and I'm sorry if some have been unsympathetic to those feelings. But SINCE you DO understand those feelings, you should ACT ACCORDINGLY. DON'T BOTHER THE GIRL. IF she's going to come back to you at all, let HER do that. I'll tell you once again, you HAVE to get the concept of the Chinese Finger Puzzle, because until you get that you are going to have very serious problems in your social life. And Ethan, people TALK about these things. How do you know somebody didn't give this girl a heads-up that you have a History of getting over-attached to women who just want to be friends and then stalking them?

Just THINK about these things, that's all I'm saying. I wouldn't bother if you weren't worth it; you VERY much are. I think you have a LOT of love to give and you're eager to do so; 300 years ago young women probably would have considered you "romantic." But you need to get that it's not 300 years ago. Women have a lot of choices and young women - I hope I won't offend anyone here - have a tendency to choose young men that they find physically attractive. In some ways you're probably MORE mature than most of these other guys, in SOME ways you're more ready for a "serious relationship" than the young women and their attractive, athletic boyfriends may be (in general). So work what you've got and stop allowing it to get in your way by over and over trying to force things to progress faster than their natural pace or in a different way than they're "meant to." It really does seem to be a consistent pattern of behavior that's repeating itself over and over and over again.

Be patient with life, be patient with the young women and be patient with yourself. I have no doubt that if you just simply
have faith - in the young women and in yourself - and in life -
then things will work out great for you. And so I'm gonna just
say it flat-out - - - There's people you marry, and there's people you f*ck. You're probably the kind of guy who - once he grows up - will end up happily married. But right now most of the young women in your age group aren't mature enough for that. "Girls just want to have fun."

Obviously I'm stereotyping and generalizing, but I think maybe you should think about some of these things. And for god's sake, as I and others have told you before, get some self-help books on relationships with women and read them. Definitely take those with a grain of salt too, but the more you start to learn about this NOW, the better off you're gonna be. And why not watch some romantic comedies on tv? You might be surprised what you can learn.

See yourself the way you are - - A "young bird" who's just starting to flap his wings, and maybe having a bit of trouble flying - as many of us do in one form or another. But get those wings flapping, and keep them flapping even when the rug's been pulled out from under you. Sooner or later another young bird will notice, and will like the way you flap your wings.

[Musicman408]

You know what- thank you. I really appreciate this. The first thought that comes to mind with the posting on here is that I really needn't post EVERY thought that comes to mind, and I have the tendency that when I am thinking or feeling something, I feel the need to post it here. And I really SHOULD NOT do that. Because I think about a lot of things, and all it would do is bombard all of you all.

As for the sentimental situation with the girl- it has since passed, so it's alright. I really do hear you out though, and appreciate you taking the time to let me know what you think! I just.... for some reason don't constrain myself as much online vs. in person. I really am not this jacked up.

Originally Posted by Ghost_Tracker

"Alrighty" Ethan, well here's some thoughts.

This might be a little disjointed, but to be honest I don't have time to make it a work of art:

First up, realize that you're young. And the girl is young. You're human, she's human, mistakes are going to be made. If she's thinking anything at all it's probably "I wish I hadn't led him on."

Things work a certain way. They have for millions of years. But society has changed - a great deal. You seem to not understand the implications of that, especially when dealing with young people. I think that that's something you need to spend a great deal of time thinking about.

Also - and I'm not trying to be mean here - You strike me as someone who doesn't realize - or doesn't want to accept - that certain actions in social relationships have permanent consequences. Some of your language in this post may be a perfect example of that. You say, "AND I KNOW I WAS ANNOYING AS HELL" and then go on to ask those very same people that you've "annoyed" about this. As others have said, however, anyone who didn't want to read this thread didn't have to. But somehow, you seem to just not GET this, and I feel that it's very important that you do - -

SOME THINGS CAN NEVER, NEVER BE UNDONE.

I admit that's something that took me a long time to get, personally. But it's one of those "hard truths of life" that you have to accept if you're going to grow up.

One reason that it's very important that you "get" that is because some people have perceived your behavior towards some of these women - and that includes Stevie - as stalking. Ethan, this seems to be more of the same, at least to a point. And you have to be "very careful" in this day and age. COOL YOUR ENGINES. STOP TRYING TO FORCE THINGS. And that IS what you've continued to try to do, with a young woman who had already labelled you as a "Friend." I've said it before and I and MANY others will try to get this across to you again - once you're labelled as a "Friend," it's over.
That's almost ALWAYS true. And no, the friendship almost certainly can't be saved after it reaches that stage. Certainly when she told you that she's Not Interested, you made things much worse by continuing to pursue her; and that IS what you were doing and you knew it and she knew that you knew it.

Now, you're an intelligent person. You KNOW that the family issues you're going through are triggering this, or at least making it worse. You're feeling sentimental and nostalgic for a simpler past; and you're maybe feeling some pressure to get into a serious relationship because your home life is changing significantly. It's natural and normal to feel that way; and I'm sorry if some have been unsympathetic to those feelings. But SINCE you DO understand those feelings, you should ACT ACCORDINGLY. DON'T BOTHER THE GIRL. IF she's going to come back to you at all, let HER do that. I'll tell you once again, you HAVE to get the concept of the Chinese Finger Puzzle, because until you get that you are going to have very serious problems in your social life. And Ethan, people TALK about these things. How do you know somebody didn't give this girl a heads-up that you have a History of getting over-attached to women who just want to be friends and then stalking them?

Just THINK about these things, that's all I'm saying. I wouldn't bother if you weren't worth it; you VERY much are. I think you have a LOT of love to give and you're eager to do so; 300 years ago young women probably would have considered you "romantic." But you need to get that it's not 300 years ago. Women have a lot of choices and young women - I hope I won't offend anyone here - have a tendency to choose young men that they find physically attractive. In some ways you're probably MORE mature than most of these other guys, in SOME ways you're more ready for a "serious relationship" than the young women and their attractive, athletic boyfriends may be (in general). So work what you've got and stop allowing it to get in your way by over and over trying to force things to progress faster than their natural pace or in a different way than they're "meant to." It really does seem to be a consistent pattern of behavior that's repeating itself over and over and over again.

Be patient with life, be patient with the young women and be patient with yourself. I have no doubt that if you just simply
have faith - in the young women and in yourself - and in life -
then things will work out great for you. And so I'm gonna just
say it flat-out - - - There's people you marry, and there's people you f*ck. You're probably the kind of guy who - once he grows up - will end up happily married. But right now most of the young women in your age group aren't mature enough for that. "Girls just want to have fun."

Obviously I'm stereotyping and generalizing, but I think maybe you should think about some of these things. And for god's sake, as I and others have told you before, get some self-help books on relationships with women and read them. Definitely take those with a grain of salt too, but the more you start to learn about this NOW, the better off you're gonna be. And why not watch some romantic comedies on tv? You might be surprised what you can learn.

See yourself the way you are - - A "young bird" who's just starting to flap his wings, and maybe having a bit of trouble flying - as many of us do in one form or another. But get those wings flapping, and keep them flapping even when the rug's been pulled out from under you. Sooner or later another young bird will notice, and will like the way you flap your wings.

[nailatixela]

Ethan, don't listen to Ghost Tracker! With your help, you and I can find Stevie and take turns dating her. Should we swap every week, or month? I'd like dibs on February since that's my birthday month, but give me a couple extra days in March since Feb is a short month.

Thank you!

[Musicman408]

Originally Posted by nailatixela

Ethan, don't listen to Ghost Tracker! With your help, you and I can find Stevie and take turns dating her. Should we swap every week, or month? I'd like dibs on February since that's my birthday month, but give me a couple extra days in March since Feb is a short month.

Thank you!

How does Stevie have anything to do with anything???

[nailatixela]

Originally Posted by Musicman408

How does Stevie have anything to do with anything???

GT mentioned Stevie stalking, and well, this is the ledge.

AND Stevie is a girl.

[Ghost_Tracker]

Originally Posted by Musicman408

As for the sentimental situation with the girl- it has since passed, so it's alright..

"Bzzzzt - OW! Bzzzt - - OW! Bzzzt - - OW!"

[jannieC]

Originally Posted by Musicman408

You know what- thank you. I really appreciate this. The first thought that comes to mind with the posting on here is that I really needn't post EVERY thought that comes to mind, and I have the tendency that when I am thinking or feeling something, I feel the need to post it here. And I really SHOULD NOT do that. Because I think about a lot of things, and all it would do is bombard all of you all.

As for the sentimental situation with the girl- it has since passed, so it's alright. I really do hear you out though, and appreciate you taking the time to let me know what you think! I just.... for some reason don't constrain myself as much online vs. in person. I really am not this jacked up.

Why. You always illicit a negative response and yet you act like we are your personal therapists. You're not bombarding, you're goading. Or, as someone else mentioned, you're emotionally unbalanced. Personally, I think it's a nice little balance of the two. But who asked me- I find you amusing.

[goldustsongbird]

Originally Posted by sara1998

God damn, Ethan... how old are you now?

Want to talk emotional life? Find your mother screwing another man - not your father. While they're still married.

Give birth to a 2 lb. baby. Go home without her. Visit her in the hospital everyday for 2 months.

Survive the suicide of your husband at 25 years old. Then explain it to the 4 year old.

IDK, maybe I'm a hardened bitch, but seriously? Emotional life? Then you go on and on about some girl? I know I don't have it that bad. I'm not even complaining. But there is my "emotional life" summed up in 50 words or less. I guess my point is that you're a grown man. Suck it up and move on, or get some professional therapy.

A mini vent by: Maria

AAAAAAALLLL RIGHT, BAYBEH! All right!

Love you so hard for this.

[Musicman408]

Originally Posted by nailatixela

GT mentioned Stevie stalking, and well, this is the ledge.

AND Stevie is a girl.

ha ha- But I've never been a Stevie stalker.

Although that could make for an interesting Olympic sport! ha ha ha- JK

[Zombie]

Originally Posted by Musicman408

...I really needn't post EVERY thought that comes to mind, and I have the tendency that when I am thinking or feeling something, I feel the need to post it here...

I think that's what Twitter is for, chief. As a friend tweeted a while back, "ATTN INTERNET: My knee is itchy & I knew you'd want to be the first to know."