The Just Thought I'd Share Thread

[Silver Springs]

Originally Posted by ButterCookie

Ugh I don't even know how to start this in a reasonable manner. Like some of the others who've posted about the subject, I've also been through an eating disorder and even though now I've "turned around completely" and I love food I still have days where it's hard and I do still skip meals, I just make up for them otherwise. It never goes away.

Dave, I'm happy you lost weight and are comfortable in your own body, that really is a brilliant achievement and is something to be proud of, I just think there's much more sensitive ways of approaching the subject than "I'm skinny so now I get the hot babes. I didn't before" and therefore implying subconsciously that if you're overweight (or not even that, just not Barbie/Ken skinny) you don't get the "hotties". It seems like you've gone from one extreme to the other and that's frightening. I don't remember where you said it but I remember you saying how you sometimes don't eat and that it hurts but you take that as a good sign because you're fighting it. I've been there, done that and it nearly killed me.

I feel like I'm beginning to get confrontational now, see. I don't want to be making an example of you but it's becoming inevitable as I type, the Riot Grrrl in me is still a bit of an oncoming storm.

On the subject of thinspiration, Bee, you're completely right. They are no different. It's just foul that one human can dictate to another how to achievewhat they consider perfection. No one should be anyone's thinspiration.

My ex-girlfriend also went through it. She also nearly killed herself and she looks in the mirror every day and thinks she's fat. She's almost 6' and I think she weighs about 7 stone. Do the maths.

Seeing discussions about it that are supportive towards one another are brilliant because we can help eachother and provide a shoulder to lean on but making jokes and enforcing the belief that skinny=perfect, IMO is NOT ok and never ever will be. I wish some people would just think a bit more before they type.

I think, in a perfect world, people wouldn't hold store to how one looks aesthetically. Unfortunately, considering the people I see around me on a daily basis, there aren't many of us who believe that. People who believed that it was the outside that counted made my life hell for many years, leading me down the road of self harm, suicidal tendencies, depression and eating disorders throughout my teenage years. They're still demons I still carry with me, because the fact that they've been coping mechanisms for so many years trained me into believing that nothing else helps. I withhold meals daily, self harm when I'm in an especially dark place that my music and art can't soothe and I constantly battle against depression. I know some of this is my own fault, because I've always been hyper sensitive. But alot of it isn't. It's the fault of people who ever told me I was too fat to be anybody's friend (manbeast was my nickname at school...). It's the people who ever told me I wasn't good enough, who chose to heighten their confidence by comparing myself negatively to them. It's my father who told me to my face that he didn't love me. And yes, this probably is a whiny ass post. But these whiny feelings were conjured by people making me feel so god-damn low that I have now zero self worth. But it's the people who don't judge on appearances and other flaws, the ones who only want to make people feel better about themselves and fulfil their potential, that make me feel proud that i didn't give in to my urges years ago and remove myself from the equation.

For the first time in my life I'm in a place where I can say, without any doubt, that I'm glad I survived.