Childfree

[vivfox]

I'm 49 now. When I was 15 I said I was never going to get married and never going to have kids. My family was convinced I was gonna be the one to have the most kids.

I never got married and I never had kids. For a few minutes in my late 30's I wished I had kids but that was because I was lonely and thought they would fill that void.

With pride I can state that I have never changed a diaper in my life. Kids annoy me. Keep them away from me. Please don't toss your kid on the phone when I've called to talk to YOU. Nothing annoys me more than to have to talk baby talk to a toddler.

A good friend recently had a baby and keeps badgering me to come over and see it. I don't give a fu&k about newborns. It only means I have to spend money on a gift. Plus she lives on the 4th floor of an apt. building with no elevator and Viv does not want to climb those stairs!

Like others have mentioned, I too am selfish with my time and money. I love my nieces and nephews but was always happy to send them back to their parents when they annoyed me.

I used to babysit my young cousins back in the early 1980's and these two girls always pissed me off. They recently reminded me that in order to chase them out of the room I would loudly sing songs by Stevie Nicks and they would repulsively run upstairs to avoid my horrible singing.

I have a policy that no one is aloud to bring their kids into my home if they are 3 years old or younger. They touch things and break things. Not cool.

And lastly(I really don't mean to offend any Ledgie) I don't like feeling obligated to say, "congratulations, you are having a baby!" But I have said this in the past and unfortunately will have to say this in the future again and again.

Rant over.

[kak125]

i always feel bad for feeling this way but everytime a friend of mine tells me they are pregnant i get so sad. i think its because i know that we wont be hanging out anymore and that just means another friend bites the dust. i feel bad for not feeling happy for them but its so hard losing so many friends these days. i now tend to gravitate more towards people that i know dont want kids. i just wish women could have babies and still go out and do stuff every so often. my friends never want to do anything. its like give the baby to your hubby for the night - geesh!!
what i hate the worst is baby showers. i am not into babies or baby stuff so i hate hate hate baby showers. i hate pretending that i am into that crap and i am sick of being invited and having to shell out cash for gifts when i know that i wont ever see that cash coming back to me since i wont be having any kids. ugh!! i have a shower on march 6th and i am dreading it!! why do people get so excited about this stuff i have no idea!!

[Fleetwoodmark]

Originally Posted by ButterCookie

While I can understand why it upsets you and do agree that things are selfish in here (I definitely speak for myself, I'm a selfish b*tch, I aint gonna change) surely it's better that we're recognising these traits in ourselves and choosing not to inflict them on children and therefore not being bad parents to said children that we don't want?

Yeah I totally understand,

Maybe I'm not used to people being that open about their negative traits

[bretonbanquet]

I'm no baby lover - never even held one - but I'm quite surprised at the level of distaste for kids on here. And the love of money is a bit surprising too - sure, it sucks to be poor - but what vital s**t are you dudes spending your money on that would be so jeopardised by having kids around? ButterCookie is right when she says there's no sense in selfish people having kids only to make them miserable - that's true - but equally it's not really anything to be proud of in the real world. In most social situations, comments like some on this thread would result in people making excuses and quietly edging away from you.

Some might say that if you don't leave anyone behind when you go, and you spend your whole life devoting all your time and money to yourself, what was the point in being here?

[kak125]

i know for me i would rather spend my money on my house and my hubby and then i like to go to a lot of concerts and i like shopping and all that kinds of stuff. i know when you have a kid you cant do all those things because you have to pay for daycare and food and clothes and all that stuff that kids require. i dont think there is anything wrong with it and i also dont think we are put here on earth just to have kids. i am here to have fun and enjoy my life as much as i can!!

[bretonbanquet]

I'm definitely not saying we're put on here to have kids - I don't have any btw. But certainly I think it's nice to contribute to the world you live in, in some way at least. I suspect that it helps when you're reaching the end. That said, everyone has the right to live as they choose.

[ButterCookie]

I think about this a lot and in a lot of depth. I've got notes about my will strewn in notebooks everywhere (call me morbid) I intend to leave money and hopefully wisdom to my younger sister and her children (if she chooses to have them) and various charities.

[HomerMcvie]

Originally Posted by McTrouble

Why do they gravitate towards you when you can't abide them? It bugs the hell out of me!

Haha. I was in the BMV, a couple of days ago, and this white trash Mom, was letting her kids run wild, and her 3yo boy just kept coming towards me! I kept OBVIOUSLY putting myself farther and farther from him....I wanted to tell her, "if that little sh*t knocks me in the balls, I'm gonna slap the sh*t out of YOU".

[KarmaContestant]

I like kids, mostly. I'd never, ever want any of my own.

My favorite thing about kids are their voices around the age of 3-5. So cute!

[Sleepless-Child]

I'm shocked by some comments here.
There's NOTHING more stupid than talking about kids in general.
Keep in mind that having a child and liking kids is a total different thing.
I don't know how to make myself clear so i hope someone who can write properly in english will come and save this thread from stupidity.

I'm sorry, but i had to say it.

[fringed n fab]

Originally Posted by bretonbanquet

I'm no baby lover - never even held one - but I'm quite surprised at the level of distaste for kids on here. And the love of money is a bit surprising too - sure, it sucks to be poor - but what vital s**t are you dudes spending your money on that would be so jeopardised by having kids around? ButterCookie is right when she says there's no sense in selfish people having kids only to make them miserable - that's true - but equally it's not really anything to be proud of in the real world. In most social situations, comments like some on this thread would result in people making excuses and quietly edging away from you.

Some might say that if you don't leave anyone behind when you go, and you spend your whole life devoting all your time and money to yourself, what was the point in being here?

I don't hate kids and yes parents give up some little things in life but gain something extraordinary when raising kids in the end I think. And that's what matters, not all the Friday nights you gave up. I don't have kids but am surrounded by nieces and nephews who adore me and think the world of me and that's fulfilling enough for me to know in some way I'll leave something behind when I go by the people who loved me if I do go through life never having a kid. Every one of us needs to leave some kind of legacy behind be it through loving friends and family and people we knew. I don't think it'll come through houses and clothes and all the cars we bought ourselves while here, that stuff fades and is immaterial. I don't think you have to have kids in this life to leave a lasting legacy, but leave something behind through people that's everlasting and what matters. I don't think anyone of us childless people want to be just a face in the family photo books when we're gone.


Hey Monalisa, who was Leonardo?
Was he Andy Warhol?
Were you Marilyn Monroe
Hey Mozart, what kind of name is Amadeus
It's kinda like Elvis
You gotta die to be famous
I may not go down in history
I just want someone to remember me

I'll probably never hold a brush
that paints a masterpiece
Probably never find a pen
that writes a symphony
But if I will love then I will find
That I have touched another life
And that's something
Something worth leaving behind

[Fleetwoodmark]

Originally Posted by Sleepless-Child

I'm shocked by some comments here.
There's NOTHING more stupid than talking about kids in general.
Keep in mind that having a child and liking kids is a total different thing.
I don't know how to make myself clear so i hope someone who can write properly in english will come and save this thread from stupidity.

I'm sorry, but i had to say it.

I totally agree and have tried, see my previous posts.

[kak125]

i cant figure out why people get all mad about us all talking about kids and not wanting them or even not liking them. its our opinion and i think its ok for us all to have our own opinions about the issue.

[Sleepless-Child]

Originally Posted by Fleetwoodmark

I totally agree and have tried, see my previous posts.

Thank you. . Some humanity here.

Originally Posted by kak125

i cant figure out why people get all mad about us all talking about kids and not wanting them or even not liking them. its our opinion and i think its ok for us all to have our own opinions about the issue.

I have nothing against the fact that you, for example, don't want children. But tell me the only reason isn't that "you don't like kids". Just tell me that and i'll calm down .

[HomerMcvie]

Originally Posted by kak125

i cant figure out why people get all mad about us all talking about kids and not wanting them or even not liking them. its our opinion and i think its ok for us all to have our own opinions about the issue.

BINGO!!!!
People, stop being so fukcing sensitive. We're only saying how we feel. If you don't like it, don't read this thread.

Maybe we should start two new threads. One for religion, and one for abortion....
Now THOSE would be fun!!!
Because I get the feeling, that 85% of us, are probably agnostic/atheist, and pro-abortion.
So the other 15%, can just freak the fukc out, over our opinions!
Fun, fun, fun!