The Just Thought I'd Share Thread

[HomerMcvie]

Originally Posted by louielouie2000

It's time to move on my friend. Your counterpart has shown their true colors quite a few times.

You remind me so much of a couple friends of mine back in the Carolinas. Both were right about your age, loved dating folks who were in their early/mid 20s, and both got their hearts smashed again and again. The reality is, at 40, you've pretty much settled into the person you're going to be the rest of your life. You know who you are, what you cherish & dislike, you know what your trajectory is, you've got your career & home settled, you know exactly what you're looking for in a dating partner, etc. Most people in their 20s are still trying to figure all that stuff out. Dating someone who's in such a different phase of their life might work for a while, but over the long haul the odds are just plain against you.

Well, what keeps me going IS, that when it's good, it's so good. The intimacy is the best I've ever had in my life. Like I've never had with anyone else. Tender, gentle, holding, with absolute trust. And our sex life is great, too. But it's that gentle intimacy, that keeps me hanging on...
And a huge part of the problem is,...that I'm the only partner, EVER. I knew, and know, that dating a virgin was going to be a problem. And I've been told all along, "what if we do end up together forever, how can I have only been with one guy, my entire life?" So I DO understand that. The good parts are really good, but the bad parts are really bad(not mean, we've never had a cross word, ever).
At the very best, it looks like we're at least on hiatus, until the next time. I'm sick over it...the best I can hope for, is that this coworker guy turns out to be an ass!

We're supposed to talk on the phone, in a little bit. I feel pathetic. Honestly, though, I've turned down going out with other people, a couple of times in the last month. I'm really not interested in dating anyone else...

And Louie, I know you're exactly right, about the 24 and 40yo trajectories. Although I'm willing to sell my house and move, when the PhD is finished. But still, yeah, at 24, you don't really know what you want yet....