The Just Thought I'd Share Thread

[BTFLCHLD]

reviews are important. thought about staying at a hotel until I came upon this gag-worthy review:

I came back to my room after a full day of meetings (was at the property for a conference), ready to relax for a few minutes before dinner. I decided to have a glass of wine and since there were no wine glasses (or wine opener) in the room, I was forced to go into the bathroom to use a small, (stained) water glass. I reached for the glass, and out of the corner of my eye I saw (in horror) that there was a long, black, wiry pubic hair hanging precariously from the side of my mouth guard (a device worn while sleeping to avoid teeth grinding, etc.).

I was paralyzed by what I'd seen. How the HELL could a pubic hair have found its way onto my mouth guard?? It certainly wasn't mine (not to get graphic, but not the right color or texture) and I was absolutely horrified. I turned to grab some toilet paper and it was at that moment I noticed my toilet seat was in the upright position, only I was traveling alone and would have never put the seat up. There were visible urine drops on the bottom of the seat, a sure indicator that a man had indeed used my toilet - likely minutes before I got back to the room!

I walked out of the bathroom and only then noticed the muddy footprints leading from the front door of my room into the bathroom. I immediately checked my shoes. Clean.

I phoned housecleaning and told them what had happened. I was clearly shaken up and was looking for some kind of an explanation. The woman on the phone (Irina) told me that she was sorry (unconvincingly) and would have someone come out to clean the room. I asked that she please send bleach. When housecleaning showed up with soap and Windex, I said that would not make me feel better about putting my mouth guard in my mouth. After a few more people showed up to offer me floor cleaner and hot water I was finally delivered Clorox wipes. Probably not meant to be used orally, but I was happier to have that in my mouth than what I was currently facing.

Once I snapped a few pics (always get a photo of the crime scene), and the clean-up was complete, I started to think about the facts. I had seen the cleaning woman mop my floor and I watched as she would walk backwards out of the room, mopping her footprints as she exited. Clearly, housecleaning was not the culprit here. The pieces started coming together. Housecleaning was not responsible for what I found in my room, but someone working for the hotel certainly was because they had a skeleton key.

It became obvious that while I was out of my room that day, a man working the grounds (muddy large shoe prints) had to urinate and instead of driving back to the employee break room (or facilities), this man let himself into my room, leaving muddy footprints as evidence, lifted my toilet seat to urinate (leaving drops of urine behind and the seat up) and then presumably washed his hands but in the process of leaning over my toiletries, inadvertently dropped his pubic hair on my mouth guard (the coup de grâce).