Lyrics

[Peestie]

OK, yesterday I wrote a song and late last night I wrote the lyrics (for the verses anyway) in about half an hour. Now I need some help with a few things.

First (and most importantly to me) would anyone be able to have a look over these lyrics and interpret them? The thing about them is that to me the meaning is very clear since I know what I wrote them about but I need to know if other people can get the meanings from them before I let my friends hear the song (once it's done being recorded). My theory is that if people who don't know anything about me can guess the meaning to song accurately I won't let my friends hear it because then I get a load of awkwardness lol.
I would have posted this at a site I'm a member of that deals with lyrics but no-one there seems to be the kind of person who wants to do anything like this so I didn't bother. This seems like a site where I'm more likely to get responses (hopefully )

Second, I have 5 verses written and the structure of the song will allow for 2-3 verses, so I'd appreciate some feedback on what ones to drop.
The song structure will either be: verse-chorus-verse-chorus-quiet presolo-guitar solo or verse-chorus-verse-verse-chorus-quiet presolo-guitar solo. It's sort of based around songs like Tango In The Night and This Is The Time, so quiet verses and loud chorus.

Third, I have a few "alternate" lines and if anyone felt that way inclined could they maybe say which ones seem best to them, or what lines need changed because they're too clumsy etc.? I'm no Bob Dylan so I can take loads criticism as long as it's constructive.

If anyone's interested in helping me I'll post the lyrics. I'm not posting them now because I'll save myself the embaressment of posting them to find out no-ones interested.

Cheers.

[Peestie]

I've already said thanks to him in a PM, but I'd like to make a public thanks to jyqm for the help. Thanks very much, man .