Meth

[DavidMn]

I've personally seen this drug ruin 3 of my friends lives, and my boyfriend Derek used to be in treatment for it. I told him when I met him if I ever caught him using it again, I was outta there. Thankfully he's kept himself clean ever since. This drug is just a terrible plague on soceity, and I hope anyone that has a problem with it can get the help they need.

[amber]

It's true, I've seen shows on how the plague is growing. It's so sad. I have a friend who's husband etc. It hasn't touched me, really, but it's fricking disgusting. My dad tells me stories of people in his mill who are doing it, and how they'll be fired any second for f*cking up. It's so cheap to make, and so potent. I don't really understand the allure, especially beyond casual use. I haven't read the stats on how addictive or not it is - I would think more addictive than coke, less than crack. I tried it once on accident (I know, on accident sounds stupid, but i thought it was something else. Which is bad, but this is years ago. Also, it's not as bad because I never had any kind of drug problem. Aside from the cigs.)
I hope someone can find a solution for this epidemic, though, because it is bileous. Talk about an empty life. Plus, doesn't it make your weiner not work after a while? Who the hell wants that? Not me. (not that I have one, I just wouldn't want to meet one that didn't work).

[DavidMn]

Originally Posted by amber

It's true, I've seen shows on how the plague is growing. It's so sad. I have a friend who's husband etc. It hasn't touched me, really, but it's fricking disgusting. My dad tells me stories of people in his mill who are doing it, and how they'll be fired any second for f*cking up. It's so cheap to make, and so potent. I don't really understand the allure, especially beyond casual use. I haven't read the stats on how addictive or not it is - I would think more addictive than coke, less than crack. I tried it once on accident (I know, on accident sounds stupid, but i thought it was something else. Which is bad, but this is years ago. Also, it's not as bad because I never had any kind of drug problem. Aside from the cigs.)
I hope someone can find a solution for this epidemic, though, because it is bileous. Talk about an empty life. Plus, doesn't it make your weiner not work after a while? Who the hell wants that? Not me. (not that I have one, I just wouldn't want to meet one that didn't work).

I'm no doctor, but I've heard it can make you impotent. It kills brain cells and the 3 people I mentioned are all pretty much unable to function in soceity these because of it. Also from what I've observed, it's especially prevalent in the gay community. It's supposed to supress your appetite making it easy to loase wwight, and I know this one drag queen that specifically used it to lose weight so they could look better performing.

[Rickypt]

I am one of the lucky ones that was able to beat addiction. I hear the relapse rate is sky high.

There is nothing positive about meth and the risk of addiction is too high for anyone to consider trying it.

[DavidMn]

Originally Posted by Rickypt

I am one of the lucky ones that was able to beat addiction. I hear the relapse rate is sky high.

There is nothing positive about meth and the risk of addiction is too high for anyone to consider trying it.

I'm happy for you that you were able to beat it. Thank god for that.

[Rickypt]

Originally Posted by DavidMn

Also from what I've observed, it's especially prevalent in the gay community. It's supposed to supress your appetite making it easy to loase wwight, and I know this one drag queen that specifically used it to lose weight so they could look better performing.

On one level the argument is that it is prevalent among gay men because it has sexual potency, but I think the real reason is because of untreated depression and overcoming isolation.

[Rickypt]

Originally Posted by DavidMn

I'm happy for you that you were able to beat it. Thank god for that.

There's some good programs in SF, but you also have to decide that you're going to do whatever it takes to beat it. For me, in addition to treating depression, it meant eliminating anything and anyone that could cause a relapse. So I cut off all contact with people who were a link to it and there are some places I can never go to again.

[DavidMn]

Originally Posted by Rickypt

On one level the argument is that it is prevalent among gay men because it has sexual potency, but I think the real reason is because of untreated depression and overcoming isolation.

That's very interesting. See I would never sit in judgement of anyone that has or has had a problem with this because I deal with depression daily, and like people that have a drug problem, some people are just unwilling to understand it, and look at people like they're some kind of loser. I gave Derek the benefit of the doubt. He didnt even tell me he had used meth until we were together for about 3 months because he was afraid that I would leave if I found out. I just told him not to do it again.

[amber]

Originally Posted by Rickypt

I am one of the lucky ones that was able to beat addiction. I hear the relapse rate is sky high.

There is nothing positive about meth and the risk of addiction is too high for anyone to consider trying it.

I'm very happy for you. What would we do without you? Can you shed any insight into it? Like, how addictive would you consider it to be? What was it's biggest draw to you? Do you have an addictive personality by nature? Did you wish you could quit all the while still doing it?
I hope that's not to personal, I'm just curious about the nature of the addiction. Because I like to try to solve social problems in my head.
I remember that one time I was hella pissed that I couldn't sleep and had to go to work. But, that night I also wrote an erotic story. I don't write, normally. And certainly not erotic stories. It was an interesting experience. I guess your sexual potency theory stands, but what about the weiner not working? Did I make that up? It must be more addictive than I theorized, because it makes people look ugly eventually, and what gay man would want that? Or most people, really.

I can't decide if I don't have a very addictive personality, or if I'm just too poor to have become addicted to much. There was one week in July about 6 years ago that I really wanted more coke, but it passed. I was unemployed at the time, so there was the boredom factor. But then, I couldn't afford more.

However, every time (which was hardly ever. And I mean, hardly ever) I did some kind of nasty nose drug, I always felt icky and blucky and like I was lame afterwords. I felt immediately that I was sending my life down the tubes, that what I did was the sure road to ruin, and that in those moments I had officially become a low life. I think I have a natural sense of wanting to be healthy, and knowing that is the best thing. I mean, I was a vegan, and always enjoyed feeling healthy and strong, thank goodness. And exercise is the pinnacle of awesome funness to me.

It's a good foundation, but I suspect others either have it, or don't. Those that do often never try bad drugs, and those that don't get caught up. so I feel blessed. Blessed that i tried bad things, but they never took hold (except ciggies and drinkies, to some extent).
Anyway.

[Rickypt]

Originally Posted by amber

I'm very happy for you. What would we do without you? Can you shed any insight into it?

Thank you! Yes, I will write more about it and answer your questions, but it'll be tomorrow.

[DavidMn]

Originally Posted by Rickypt

Thank you! Yes, I will write more about it and answer your questions, but it'll be tomorrow.

You know, I'm also glad you were able to beat it because you obviously have a strong dedication to the AIDS issue, and I think god or whomever you believe in had plans for you.

[jannieC]

My husband lived with a guy in rehab who was there because of meth. He actually HAD to be in rehab because he had been busted about having a meth lab. Anyway, after SIX months in rehab, this guy went right back to his addiction and lost everything. Ended up in in jail etc. It's so horrible. My husband's thing was NOT speed- I don't know which is worse.

Rickypt, I want to congratulate you on getting off drugs. I know how hard you've worked. I look forward to hearing your story. xoxoxo

[DavidMn]

Another terrible thing about Meth is that the stuff they use to make it can be highly explosive. I've heard stories about meth labs that blew up th/at literally blew up the entire house and sometimes homes around it.

[GODDESS6]

this drug sucks, i have lost 3 family members to using it & my uncle now lives under a bridge becuz that is all he wants to do, is meth~ recently my neighbors were raided, now the wife is a school teacher & he a mechanic~ we live in an upscale neighborhood & it does really affect every economic range~ my neighbors have just been recently sentenced & the wife got 1 yr for possession & her husband 5-10 for dealing~ i just shake my head, you never know who is living right next to you, these people don't look like the poster children for meth, quite the opposite~ it is just a very sad thing to me~
i would never do it~
& rickypt, congrats to kicking the habit!!! ~

it is also sad that it is so prevelant that my 7 yr old asked "what is meth mommy?" & wonders why the police took his neighbor away~ i just told him the truth~

[amber]

Originally Posted by jannieC

My husband lived with a guy in rehab who was there because of meth. He actually HAD to be in rehab because he had been busted about having a meth lab. Anyway, after SIX months in rehab, this guy went right back to his addiction and lost everything. Ended up in in jail etc. It's so horrible. My husband's thing was NOT speed- I don't know which is worse.

Rickypt, I want to congratulate you on getting off drugs. I know how hard you've worked. I look forward to hearing your story. xoxoxo

That is awesome your husband is doing well. See, that is what I don't understand as much is the relapse. If your physical body is no longer addicted, I can't imagine your mind wanting to take it up again. I guess I mean specifically with something so nasty. I'm sure we've all quit smoking and relapsed. I dunno, maybe in that way it is understandable, but I personally don't understand it with the nastier drugs. Although, just like with anything else, I'm sure someone's social structure can play a big part in relapse. I drink and smoke on occasion with friends.
Ryan said he had to cut off from all his old friend/places - that is probably a huge part of it, and it can be hard to not hang out with friends. It sucks being lonely, or alone. And I have noticed that most people are not good at being alone. I have noticed this in relation to myself, I am very good at being alone, so that factor doesn't bother me too much. Thank goodness. But most other people I know - I am suprised at their inability to be alone, or amuse themselves when they are alone. Which is natural, as a human - I'm probably the weird one - but still I can see that it sucks for most people.
Which randomly reminded me of a song I love "I am a rock, I am an Iiiiiiiiisland" I haven't decided yet whether it's better to be like me, or to be like most other people. I know that I would never trade having company for doing things I don't like to do. At least not for long, and I never have. Thus, my 20,000 posts!!!!! Seriously, though, I'll leave parties and walk home if I'm bored. I'll be thinking "I have a book that is way more interesting than any of these people!" Or I'll think "I could be singing a great song I've sung a million times before, right now! Instead, I'm talking to this lamo!" I know, I know, I'm a bad person...A bad person with subpar social skills...
Don't get me wrong, I love talking to other people - but only people i like, people who are interesting and funny, like the people here on the ledge. Sadly and regrettably, I can't be bothered with the "others". I've tried, but I'm not the most stellar "faker of emotions".