the story of my life

David · #2 03-19-2008, 05:48 PM

You certainly live a whirlwind existence!

SortaSavageLike · #3 03-19-2008, 06:00 PM

Get a life!

trackaghost · #4 03-19-2008, 06:19 PM

I too sometimes feel like a small red cross in a box. You are not alone.

Sanne2 · #5 03-20-2008, 05:35 AM

Lol, This is the person that claims she's related to Stevie, right? Hilarious.

Gypsy-Rhiannon · #6 03-20-2008, 06:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by silverspring72

What are we supposed to be looking at?

steviefan59 · #7 03-20-2008, 09:27 AM

hi guys...i don't see anything in the first post...just "the story of my life"...tried clicking on it and na da

...take care...pat

Betsy · #8 03-20-2008, 09:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by silverspring72

Man, your life is much more exciting than mine!

JazmenFlowers · #9 03-20-2008, 10:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trackaghost

I too sometimes feel like a small red cross in a box. You are not alone.

sniff sniff.

BTFLCHLD · #10 03-20-2008, 10:15 AM

Excerpts from a Dog's Diary

6:00 am - At last! I Go Pee!
My favorite thing!

8:00 am - Dog food!
My favorite thing!

9:30 am - A car ride!
My favorite thing!

9:40 am - A walk in the park!
My favorite thing!

10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted!
My favorite thing!

12:00 pm - Lunch!
My favorite thing!

1:00 pm - Played in the yard!
My favorite thing!

3:00 pm - Wagged my tail!
My favorite thing!

5:00 pm - Milk bones!
My favorite thing!

6:00 pm - They're home!
My favorite thing!

7:00 pm - Got to play ball!
My favorite thing!

8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people!
My favorite thing!

11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed!
My favorite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat's Diary

Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat,

while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear,

I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.

In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet.

I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts,

since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of.

However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.
Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight.

I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event.
However, I could hear the noises and smell the food.

I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies."

I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking.

I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.

The dog receives special privileges.

He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return.

He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant.

I observe him communicate with the guards regularly.

I am certain that he reports my every move.

My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell,
so he is safe for now . . .

Steviefan49 · #11 03-20-2008, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gypsy-Rhiannon

What are we supposed to be looking at?

Ditto... I just see a small red "x" in a box..?

jcfree · #12 03-20-2008, 11:59 AM

BTFLCHLD you made my day! I started reading the dog diary and thought how cute. Then I started reading the cat diary and started laughing and I couldn't stop, it is hilarious! I was in a funky mood, and after that laughing bout I am feeling much better. KUDOS to you for the uplifting reading material.