Pointless Conversations

[Red]

[QUOTE=amber]
My mom is crazy too, but astonishingly astute, and not at all vague, in fact the opposite. It's gross. She's really negative, though, which pisses me off. She'll call me and be like "well, I wish you had finished school earlier, now that you are thirty you probably won't be able to get a job" And she'll be like "Well, did you pay such and such? You suck with money, I think you have a problem and should get therapy!"

Yes, it's magical.

and then she tells me about bunches of stuff that is dangerous - like the place I live, and how she never wants to drive across that bridge again, and earthquakes, and blah. She majored in environmental science, so she knows more dangerous things than most people.
Oh, and I love when she tells me things about my Dad that I would never, ever, ever, want to know.

And then there's the times (usually) where I'll be like "oh, then I did this and this, and my friend blah, and whatever!" and she'll be like "OH! I did that and that and that, too, and my friend blah!" and then follow with some advise.
That's why I rarely talk to them on the phone.
Like, I WISH my mom said something vague and then randomly hung up!
On the upside, she's very smart, so it can be fun, but whatevs.[/
QUOTE]

Can I just interject here and tell you Amber, that regardless of what you're going to school for, you HAVE to be a writer. Be a columnist or something, because I damn near pissed myself reading this post - tears streaaaaming down my face. So there- you have a brand new career!!

Oh and Diss, I think you're Mom was talking about the Smart Car. I had a similar convo with my Mom and she could't think of the name as it really doesn't have a "car" name, like something named after a carniverous animal or a planet.

[ragandbone]

Originally Posted by amber

My mom is crazy too, but astonishingly astute, and not at all vague, in fact the opposite. It's gross. She's really negative, though, which pisses me off. She'll call me and be like "well, I wish you had finished school earlier, now that you are thirty you probably won't be able to get a job"
Yes, it's magical.

and then she tells me about bunches of stuff that is dangerous - like the place I live, and how she never wants to drive across that bridge again, and earthquakes, and blah.

It is magical.
My mother combines the vague and the negative, or rather she embeds the negative in the vague. I will tell her something her grandson did at the park, and she will say
"Oooh, I worry about Leo" (my son) but she won't give me the details of the worry when pressed, or how they relate to the park anecdote. Them, moments later, she might drop in an awful story from the news about a freak accident, complete with grisly details.

I got the ..."wish you had finished school earlier" for years. It's a little maddening, because, of course, you can't fix that one, even with a degree. The one negative thing my mother does that I have caught myself doing with my son, (and which I must stop doing) is that she broadcasts her concerns over my shortcomings. When I did poorly in Algebra, even while sailing through honors science and English courses, she told just about everyone she knew. Of course, my 2 year old is not in Algebra, but I have caught myself telling my friends that I am concerned about him getting pushed, or that he is short for his age, and I have done this while he is in the room. Noooo!

[ragandbone]

Originally Posted by amber

(she invented a flower, as well, and bred it) -

There's a cool resume item! Really.

Originally Posted by amber

But she still don't have no JOB!!! So step off!!!! It's like a serious situation of the Pot calling the Kettle black, and I won't accept it. Plus, she didn't have all the super fun debauched times I have had. For reals. I had a bunch of sexy fun in my twenties. I don't regret.

Well it sounds like you have a plan (paralegals are paid well, I believe) and I think you really should pursue the writing too. I keep forgetting, I saved this link to pass on to you. Look at the second listing:
http://www.womanrock.com/jobs.htm
The twenties were really fun I have stories and have a few surviving SF friends to help me remember the parts that are hazy. ;^) After my mother got over the freak out of my moving to the City, dying my hair, working in clubs, etc. she started to romanticise my city life; it started after she read Tales Of The City.

Originally Posted by amber

What you have to remember is - at this point you really have the power over your parents. They want to see you more than you want to see them. It's bliss, if you realize it.

It's good that you realize that, disables the manipulation mechanisms (yipes, that sounds like something from Est, or Landmark Forum.)
Now most of my interactions with my mom are about her relationship with my son. They want to hang out with each other, and that takes some of the pressure off of me. Otherwise, with just the two of us, it is too intense - I am an only child of a single mother.

Originally Posted by amber

Honestly, you probably should chill with the boy. Soon you will discern his special skill(s) And he will be awesome!

But never, ever, ever, tell others about your kids' "shortcomings" while your kids can hear you. It's like, the most humiliating thing in the world. Hope that helps you curb that tendency...

Oh, I know. That's why I mentioned it, because I have already stopped doing it (well except for my example here). My son is really cool, and he is already into music and sound, and how things work. He cracks me up. I am just neurotic, so if a pediatrician crinkles his brow in concern at where my child falls in the height/weight bell curve, I can't stop worrying about it. So, I am never taking him to the doctor again.




Just kidding

[ragandbone]

Originally Posted by UnwindedDreams

... maybe she just wanted a reason to call you.

That was my first thought, too.

[ontheEdgeof17]

Originally Posted by reebokandlace

I often wonder if our elderly are over medicated.

I don't think they are medicated enough.

[sara1998]

Originally Posted by dissention

My ma is only 46.

She could be talking about hybrids, but it was so damned vague and inane that I was surprised she even told me that it was CARS that she was talking about.



You don't know my mother. She's crazy as bat****. In a good way, but crazy nonetheless.



I get those, too. Mostly from friends.

You just described my mother. Are you my long lost brother???

[ontheEdgeof17]

So, is this a pointless conversation about pointless conversations?

[ragandbone]

Originally Posted by ontheEdgeof17

So, is this a pointless conversation about pointless conversations?

Yes, sort of a meta-conversation about pointlessness.

oh pointy birds
oh pointy pointy
anoint my head
anointy nointy
S. Martin

[SuzeQuze]

Amber, tell your mom she might want to get some medication for her excessive anxiety. Tell her it really sounds clinical. Okay, maybe not tell her, but to me it does.

She is so wrong about you getting your degree later in life. Jeez Louise. You know, one of my best friends finished his engineering degree last year and is now being paid 80,000 a year. He is so excited and happy with his job. He is 34.

Just follow your bliss. Also, your mom may want to see you more now, but if something should happen with her health (which I hope it doesn't) that will change. My mom had breast cancer so now I want to see her and talk to her. Weird huh?

I agree with others, you are a good writer.

[snowman]

My Mom once told me- "Children stop being children, but parents never stop being parents".

[cliffdweller]

Originally Posted by dissention

I went out to eat earlier this evening and when I got home, I got a call from my mother. As soon as I answer the phone, she barks out "Have you seen those new cars?"

"What new cars?"
"The new cars that they came out with," she tells me.
"But what kind?" I ask. "Honda, Toyota, Subaru?"
"Yes."
"Yes what?"
"Those cars!"
"But which ones? Those are all from different companies," I tell her.
"THE ONES YOU SAID."
"So you're talking about the new cars from all different of companies?"
"Oh, forget it." And she hangs up on me.

Does anyone else get telephone calls as inane as the one I recently received? Do they irk you as much as they irk me? Do you ponder changing your number afterwards and not giving it to anyone so that they can't bother you? Crikey.

Yeah, I just had a pointless conversation with my husband this morning about parking. I love it when he says I say things that I never said! Wait...that was more of an argument than a pointless conversation .

But yeah, I know what you're talking about. Sometimes people should just save it.

[cliffdweller]

Originally Posted by ragandbone

I is magical.
My mother combines the vague and the negative, or rather she embeds the negative in the vague. I will tell her something her grandson did at the park, and she will say
"Oooh, I worry about Leo" (my son) but she won't give me the details of the worry when pressed, or how they relate to the park anecdote.

I hate that ****. My mother-in-law does that and it drives me nuts!

[cliffdweller]

Originally Posted by amber

What am I supposed to write? "Smart Ass Musings That Are Meaningless"!

or how about "pointless conversations" that are meaningless? Appropos for this thread I think...

[DavidMn]

Originally Posted by dissention

I went out to eat earlier this evening and when I got home, I got a call from my mother. As soon as I answer the phone, she barks out "Have you seen those new cars?"

"What new cars?"
"The new cars that they came out with," she tells me.
"But what kind?" I ask. "Honda, Toyota, Subaru?"
"Yes."
"Yes what?"
"Those cars!"
"But which ones? Those are all from different companies," I tell her.
"THE ONES YOU SAID."
"So you're talking about the new cars from all different of companies?"
"Oh, forget it." And she hangs up on me.

Does anyone else get telephone calls as inane as the one I recently received? Do they irk you as much as they irk me? Do you ponder changing your number afterwards and not giving it to anyone so that they can't bother you? Crikey.

Oh yes. sometimes I find myself nodding off on the phone!!

[jannieC]

Originally Posted by SuzeQuze

She is so wrong about you getting your degree later in life. Jeez Louise. You know, one of my best friends finished his engineering degree last year and is now being paid 80,000 a year. He is so excited and happy with his job. He is 34.

I have to second this. I just got my BS in Psychology last year and I am 37! It took me almost 8 years to get my degree, and I still have grad school this fall! I think our age gives of credibility that maybe a younger person wouldn't have. We need SOME kind of an edge, right?

And seriously, I love reading your posts- you are a great writer for sure.