For Those Without Kids... - Page 12

ontheEdgeof17 · #**166** 03-24-2005, 05:37 PM

Chariot Illume? Yes? No?

I'm guessing no..........

I like it, though.

Johnny Stew · #**167** 03-24-2005, 06:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cliffdweller

Hmmm...trends aside, I think it should just come down to this: if you want children and want to give them a good home then do it. If you don't, then be honest about it and DON'T! There are too many bad parents out there regardless of their sexual preference. Kuddos to Sparky for knowing what he wants. Too many people enter into parenthood for all the wrong reasons either because of social pressure, pressure form a spouse or partner, or personal pressure. Having someone to carry on your genes is not a good primary reason to have a child. Anyone who says that is DOOMED as a parent!

Well, that's exactly it. Adopting or having a child should be done out of a genuine desire to have children and do the best possible job that you can raising them.

Many people put no more thought into whether or not they can actually provide for a child and raise a child properly, than they do which toothpaste to buy.

GypsySorcerer · #**168** 03-24-2005, 06:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dissention

Thank you.

But it's still plain.

I love Krista, but I'd go bonkers if people called me by those other names, too.

It's the most insulting thing when someone gets your name wrong. I mean, we're talking about my identity here.

amber · #**169** 03-24-2005, 06:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GypsySorcerer

It's the most insulting thing when someone gets your name wrong. I mean, we're talking about my identity here.

Don't be so sensitive, Khristie....

GypsySorcerer · #**170** 03-24-2005, 06:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GateandGarden

Same here. I would hate it if people couldn't get it right, but it is beautiful, and different.

As it is, so many people call me Haley and Heather.

For some reason, Hillary is hard to remember.

I bet people want to spell it 'Hilary' too. I get things addressed to 'Christa' all the time.

Johnny Stew · #**171** 03-24-2005, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sparky

Giving a parentless child two fathers or two mothers or one parent is better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. Beats being raised in an institution. Having 1 leg would suck, but it beats having two stumps.

However, I doubt if anyone, given the choice, would put having a mother and a father both raise them at number 2 or 3 on their list of ideal parenting situations.

I am of the mind that fathers and mothers both bring unique and crucial skills to the table in parenting. The balance of those often opposing energies helps to create more balanced individuals. Ideally.

Yes, ideally having a mother and father is the best possible scenario. But we don't live in a perfect world. We live in a world with far too many children who have no parents whatsoever, and I'm sorry, but I feel being raised by two fathers or two mothers is far better than being bounced from foster family to foster family, or languishing in an orphanage.

Lots of people, many through situations that are no fault of their own, find themselves raising a child as a single parent.
Is it ideal? No. But if you're loving, nurturing, supportive, and a good provider, that child will grow into a well-rounded adult, whether they had two parents of opposite genders or not.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sparky

And oh yeah, walk around Chelsea, Weho, Capitol Hill, Hillcrest, or any other gay mecca city...adopting babies is the new rainbow necklace, the new Madonna record, this decade's own handerkerchief code. It's ridiculous. People take it very lightly, and it smacks of playing house and aping straight people. I find it suspect.
Can adopting a kid be a selfless and honorable choice ? Certainly. Is it often in these cases ? Sketchy. Don't get me started on the rent-a-womb or turkey baster phenomenon. The ethics of those situations are pretty damned slippery.

It all depends on the reasons it's being done.
If, as you said, these couples are doing it simply because "everyone else is," then that's a very sad thing indeed. Hopefully that's not the case... even if it appears trendy at first glance.

But I don't feel that, as gay men and women, we should limit our choices in life out of a fear that it will seem like we're trying to ape straight people.
We're not confined to club-hopping, pill-popping and promiscuous sex anymore. We don't need to straightjacket our own selves and limit our own choices. That's done enough for us.

Johnny Stew · #**172** 03-24-2005, 06:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jason T.

The funny thing is....

Dude! You're alive! How've you been?

Johnny Stew · #**173** 03-24-2005, 06:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GateandGarden

As it is, so many people call me Haley and Heather.

For some reason, Hillary is hard to remember.

I love the name Hillary, I think it's beautiful.

I went to school with a girl named Cecily... talk about a name people BUTCHER!

markolas · #**174** 03-24-2005, 06:50 PM

Wow, internalized homophobia (as well as gender stereotyping) is running amok on this thread.

WelshWitchPMD · #**175** 03-24-2005, 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GypsySorcerer

It's the most insulting thing when someone gets your name wrong. I mean, we're talking about my identity here.

I usually just give the name "Pat" like when I order food or something. You would be surprised at how many times they list me as "Cat"

I have a friend named "Kim" and sometimes when we make a reservation it will be under "Tim".

They are not big deals but they can be kind of funny.

I have people at work just call me "Pat" because they will never, ever spell "Pattie" correctly. Some new people will call me "Pam" or "Peg".

What is wrong with some people? Are they just ignorant or stupid?

sparky · #**176** 03-24-2005, 07:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by markolas

Wow, internalized homophobia (as well as gender stereotyping) is running amok on this thread.

Where oh WHERE might that be ?

CreepingDeath · #**177** 03-24-2005, 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dissention

Would you prefer I name my kid Apple?

Here's some others for you to ponder:

Speck Wildhorse & Hud (John Mellencamp)
Sage Moonblood (Sylvester Stallone)
Camera (Arthur Ash)
Fuddy (Damon Wayans)
Seven (Erykah Badu)
Jermajesty (Jermaine Jackson)

dissention · #**178** 03-24-2005, 07:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CreepingDeath

Jermajesty (Jermaine Jackson)

He's got another one crawling aorund called Spermajesty, too, right?

sparky · #**179** 03-24-2005, 07:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Johnny Stew

Yes, ideally having a mother and father is the best possible scenario. But we don't live in a perfect world. We live in a world with far too many children who have no parents whatsoever, and I'm sorry, but I feel being raised by two fathers or two mothers is far better than being bounced from foster family to foster family, or languishing in an orphanage.

Exactly what I said.

Quote:

Lots of people, many through situations that are no fault of their own, find themselves raising a child as a single parent.

And God Bless Em.

Quote:

Is it ideal? No. But if you're loving, nurturing, supportive, and a good provider, that child will grow into a well-rounded adult, whether they had two parents of opposite genders or not.

In what Movie Of The Week ? I wouldn't bet the rent on that. If only that formula bore itself out consistently. It's way more complicated than that, methinks.

Quote:

But I don't feel that, as gay men and women, we should limit our choices in life out of a fear that it will seem like we're trying to ape straight people.

Fear ? Hm. That doesn't compute. My issue with gay people making babies for themselves is really about the fact that a choice is made for a kid who doesn't have a voice. I think it's extremely self centered. Sure, people can make the best of it, but it's really about people "fulfilling" THEIR needs, no matter the cost. It is so 70's Me Generation. Sure it can all work out peachy, but I think there's a price paid for it. And it isn't coming out of the parent's pockets.

Quote:

We're not confined to club-hopping, pill-popping and promiscuous sex anymore. We don't need to straightjacket our own selves and limit our own choices. That's done enough for us.

I certainly don't limit MYself. I wasn't aware that reliving the Mineshaft and Studio 54, or pretending you're June and Ward Cleaver were the only options. That seems like a couple of straighjackets right off the bat. The two utmost extremes.

GateandGarden · #**180** 03-24-2005, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GypsySorcerer

I bet people want to spell it 'Hilary' too. I get things addressed to 'Christa' all the time.

Yes! OMG! Apparently, the one "l" is the most popular spelling. Some people are kind enough to ask if it has two "l"s so they don't make that mistake, but it seems to be everyone's first though to just spell it with one.