Just found my letter to Oprah

[RavenOfRhiannon]

Even though I did not get picked to be on Oprah, I wanted to share this letter my friend Anthony and I wrote to the show. I'm thinking of Anthony a lot today.

Hi Oprah,
We know you're going to receive a ton of responses from Stevie Nicks fans who dress like her, and name their pets and children "Rhiannon", and who can in one sitting (and from memory) name every one of her songs in chronological order, and then (from memory) sing each one (and the live variant from the concerts) . In our opinion though, that's not what a #1 fan is all about. Though we've done all that too! For us, Stevie Nicks is the reason two, young gay men who live more than 2,000 miles apart, made it through their adolescence still alive and have been BFFs and happy, fulfilled grown men for more than 20 years. To us, Stevie's music and lyrics have been a source of strength and a basis for how we live our lives.

Anthony’s love of Stevie's music, started when in 1981. ‘I was 18 years old, had just figured out I was gay and was attending a religious school. I didn't get what a troubled guy I was. Angry and hated everything, but didn't get yet that it was due to not accepting myself. One day in the cafeteria, I heard the song "Bella Donna" on the radio from speaker's overhead and was instantly taken by the lyrics. As I grabbed my food, "it sort of captured my soul" as the lyric goes. I left school, went and bought that album, poured over the liner notes and felt like someone had read my mind. I went and found everything Stevie Nicks had ever recorded and found such comfort and camaraderie in those songs. I believe finding Stevie, helped me find myself, to be a fearless "Wild Heart" and to come to terms with who I was. Her music was a huge component of what transformed me into a happy, joyful person. To this day, Stevie's music is like religion to me. Not that she's a deity --she's more like a goddess! Joking! But it helps keep me centered and make sense of the world.

In Feb. 1991, when I (a 26 year old at the time) wrote a letter to a comic book telling them how one of the main characters Raven, reminded me of Stevie Nicks and to my surprise they printed it. Weeks later, a typed envelope arrived in the mail. It was a letter from an 17-year old (he lied aid he was 18, but he was really of the "Edge of 17") who lived in a tiny town in Texas. He was amazed that anyone else had ever made the Stevie/Raven connection and wanted to say hi. I wrote back, he wrote back again and about 10 letters later, after discussing many of Stevie's lyrics via letter, sending Stevie related gifts and our own writings and poetry, plus of course talking about ourselves Randy confided in me that he was gay. I hadn't mentioned myself yet and thought it was very brave. I was honored by his trust. In just 10 letters, I'd found someone who got me (and Stevie), when no one else did.’

For Randy, growing up gay in a small conservative town in Texas was not an easy task. ‘I knew I was different, but I thought I was the only one. I had a loving and supportive family, but I was so afraid of telling them who I really was, what if they stopped loving me? I was living a lie every day, and so very scared.
My solace was in the music of Stevie Nicks. It was through her that I began to understand how to love myself, and protect myself. When the taunts and bullying would seem overwhelming, I would lose myself in the world Stevie created. It is not an exaggeration to say that Stevie saved my life on more than one occasion.

In 1991, I was reading a comic book called ‘The New Titans.’ In the letter column in the back of the book, was a letter from Anthony Lower. He signed off comparing a character named Raven to Stevie Nicks. Could it be? There was someone else that thought the way I did. I wrote to him and waited. To my delight, he responded. Anthony became my lifeline, reassuring me that It Gets Better. Ant gave me the courage to come out, and live as an open and proud gay man, no matter that anyone else thought. Courage I would not have had, had it not been for his encouragement and the music of Stevie Nicks. Stevie’s music is the soundtrack to my life. Every significant event in my life has been underscored by a song or album of hers:
When my father, Steve (who was born on May 25th, a day before Stevie’s birthday) committed suicide in 1994, Stevie’s song ‘Street Angel’ was there to comfort me. In 2004, when my partner and I survived a break-in in our home, ‘Illume’ helped me feel safe again. For every ‘Standback’ or ‘Dreams’ that the mainstream public sings along to, there is a deeper, secret, and more personal song in Stevie’s catalog for me and Anthony (who is, of course, my ‘Gypsy’).

We have become the best of friends, even though we have not seen each other in 20 odd years. Not a day goes by that he is not in my thoughts. We have Stevie to thank for saving our lives, and for bringing us together.
In 1996, Anthony actually had a chance to meet Stevie. ‘She was going into a jewelry store in a seedy neighborhood and her chauffeur asked me to watch her limo! When she was done, I had a chance to talk to her for a few moments. I was a total fanboy, I don't think was able to actually speak any actual sentences! But as we parted, holding hands I told her "I'll never forget you." She replied to me, squeezing both my hands tight: "I'll never forget you either..." Though I am sure she has, it would mean so much to have the chance for Randy to meet her and for us to thank her for saving and making our lives so meaningful.’
So you see, Oprah, there is no single #1 Stevie fan. Stevie’s music is not only a connection between her and her fans, it’s also a bridge from person to person. Like a web we are all interconnected through her music.