Important Senior Prom/Relationship Question-Advice Being Seeked :)

Musicman408 · #1 01-13-2008, 11:02 AM

Ok, so I have a situation here and was wondering if anyone had any suggestions on how to go about it.

Yes senior prom is months away, but one should still kind of think about it. My sister especially, and my family would like me to go with a date, as opposed to just a group of guy friends.

Now I am sure you remember that one girl that I care about recently, the one that I was thinking about singing in my band, well the two of us are friends to a degree and I do still care about her. I, if I decided to eventually ask her, would get a group of friends together, including her, and do something outside of school just to solidify our ralationship as friends, because sometimes I wonder.

Here is the problem. Now, I would only ask her to prom (when the time comes) as friends but the problem is this...... She has a boyfriend who is actually a senior in college. He goes to school in another city so he is not at home very much (it's still in state though). They have been dating since August/September maybe, and the whole situation is just like, WTF??? Know why I mean? She is a junior in high school, he a senior in college, so you can just imagine all the legality issues.

So it's like, would it be alright to ask her as a friend, even with her Boyfriend in all? Would it be appropriate, why and why not? I'm kind of cought in between a rock and a hard place on this one and was just wondering what you all thought!!!

Much Love,
Ethan

jannieC · #2 01-13-2008, 11:55 AM

So if you, not your family, want to ask a girl to the prom instead of going with a group, then ask whomever you want. If you decide to ask the girl who has a boyfriend, tell her you're asking her as a friend only- no strings attached. Considering you have like, at least 4 months to worry about it, I'd say give it a rest. If she is a junior in HS and he a senior in college, they're probably not seeing very much of each other so I wouldn't worry too much about the "legality" part. Oh, and one more thing. If you have to get the group together before asking her, in order to "solidify" your friendship with her, you're probably better off just letting the whole thing go and finding someone else to ask.

Musicman408 · #3 01-13-2008, 12:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jannieC

So if you, not your family, want to ask a girl to the prom instead of going with a group, then ask whomever you want. If you decide to ask the girl who has a boyfriend, tell her you're asking her as a friend only- no strings attached. Considering you have like, at least 4 months to worry about it, I'd say give it a rest. If she is a junior in HS and he a senior in college, they're probably not seeing very much of each other so I wouldn't worry too much about the "legality" part. Oh, and one more thing. If you have to get the group together before asking her, in order to "solidify" your friendship with her, you're probably better off just letting the whole thing go and finding someone else to ask.

Well, I would say that she is one of the girls that I have the best relationship with at school. I guess what I meant when I said what I said was that getting a group together would just be a good way to spend some time together outside of school, and getting her to think about me outside of school. I don't know if that makes any sense, but hopefully it does.

But yeah, I will continue to cultivate our current relationship and hopefully make it grow. And like I said, take her out or something, with a group of people, so it doesn't appear like a date, just a group outing with friends and maybe her seeing me more outstide of school could get something to form in her heart for me..... Who knows.

David · #4 01-13-2008, 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Musicman408

Yes senior prom is months away, but one should still kind of think about it. My sister especially, and my family would like me to go with a date, as opposed to just a group of guy friends.

Parents are always butting in.

Quote:

Now I am sure you remember that one girl that I care about recently,

No, I'm sorry I don't.

Quote:

the one that I was thinking about singing in my band, well the two of us are friends to a degree and I do still care about her.

Would you give your life for her if circumstance called upon to do so? For example, let's say terrorists hijacked the plane you two were on, & they forced one of you to get thrown out so that the other one might live. Would you sacrifice yourself?

Quote:

I, if I decided to eventually ask her, would get a group of friends together, including her, and do something outside of school just to solidify our ralationship as friends, because sometimes I wonder.

Go to Ruby's for the bleu-cheese burger! MMMMmmmm GOOD!!

Quote:

Here is the problem. Now, I would only ask her to prom (when the time comes) as friends but the problem is this...... She has a boyfriend who is actually a senior in college. He goes to school in another city so he is not at home very much (it's still in state though). They have been dating since August/September maybe, and the whole situation is just like, WTF??? Know why I mean? She is a junior in high school, he a senior in college, so you can just imagine all the legality issues.

Report him to Social Services, & then take your new girl to a party!

Quote:

So it's like, would it be alright to ask her as a friend, even with her Boyfriend in all?

Sure! Plus, it would be the proper thing to do to call him & tell him your name, where you live, & what you plan on doing with his lady. That's how folks typically handle this sort of thing.

buckymcnix · #5 01-13-2008, 01:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by David

Report him to Social Services, & then take your new girl to a party!

Sure! Plus, it would be the proper thing to do to call him & tell him your name, where you live, & what you plan on doing with his lady. That's how folks typically handle this sort of thing.

Just who are you speaking for here David?

Out here on the West Coast, when we are gonna steal someone's boyfriend or girlfriend while they are away at college, we do it on webcam so that the whole world wide web can watch us underhandedly humiliate and hurt someone we don't know.

If we only had Karma Sprinkles to pass out over here. . .

Musicman408 · #6 01-13-2008, 01:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by buckymcnix

Just who are you speaking for here David?

Out here on the West Coast, when we are gonna steal someone's boyfriend or girlfriend while they are away at college, we do it on webcam so that the whole world wide web can watch us underhandedly humiliate and hurt someone we don't know.

If we only had Karma Sprinkles to pass out over here. . .

Well I do know the boyfriend. He's my choir director's son, and the girl is besties with his sister...... Crazy, huh?

Keep in mind though guys, my past history with romantic situations and girls and whatnot, you know, my shy nature. And the fact that this whole thing is hard for me, like.... What do i do? Know what I'm saying?

buckymcnix · #7 01-13-2008, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Musicman408

Well I do know the boyfriend. He's my choir director's son, and the girl is besties with his sister...... Crazy, huh??

awesome - I think you get extra points when you hurt and alienate the entire family, so work on gettin to know the mom.

it's creepy more than crazy

Quote:

Originally Posted by Musicman408

Keep in mind though guys, my past history with romantic situations and girls and whatnot, you know, my shy nature. And the fact that this whole thing is hard for me, like.... What do i do? Know what I'm saying?

Shy people don't steal other people's girlfriends.
Assholes do.

jannieC · #8 01-13-2008, 02:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by buckymcnix

If we only had Karma Sprinkles to pass out over here. . .

They would come in handy, wouldn't they?

Miss Vicky · #9 01-13-2008, 02:13 PM

Given your history - and with prom being "months away" - you'll probably be completely smitten ("OMG she's the greatest ever! I'm so in love!"

) with some other girl by the time prom comes anyway, so wtf does it matter?

Musicman408 · #10 01-13-2008, 02:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by buckymcnix

awesome - I think you get extra points when you hurt and alienate the entire family, so work on gettin to know the mom.

it's creepy more than crazy

Shy people don't steal other people's girlfriends.
Assholes do.

Well, I know who the boyfriend is, but I don;t think he knows who I am, unless the director talks about me sometimes, which I think he does because I am one of his favorite students........

And I do know the mom, she was my music teacher in elementary school.......... Wow, this is crazy isn't it.

Bottom line, he is WAAYYYY older, and the two of us are friends so...... What do you think?

paleshadow · #11 01-13-2008, 02:48 PM

This is completely off topic, but I know how much you pride yourself on being a writer, so I just wanted to point out that you wrote "Important Senior Prom/Relationship Question-Advice Being Seeked

".

I hope you've seeked out a good editor for those books you want published!

As for the prom advice, It's your prom and you should be able to go with whomever you decide. Are you going to let your parents and sister arrange your marriage when that times comes also? It isn't a good idea to ask this other young lady to go even as friends, since you clearly have feelings for her even though she is in a relationship. I think it's time to start asking yourself why you always seem to be drawn to girls who are unavailable.
My advice is to go with your friends. You will have more fun and perhaps find a single girl who also came with her friends that you can hang out with and later obsess over.

danax6 · #12 01-13-2008, 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Musicman408

Well I do know the boyfriend. He's my choir director's son, and the girl is besties with his sister...... Crazy, huh?

Besties as in bestiality? Is it derived from that? A new word that has yet to travel across the Atlantic?

Musicman408 · #13 01-13-2008, 03:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by paleshadow

This is completely off topic, but I know how much you pride yourself on being a writer, so I just wanted to point out that you wrote "Important Senior Prom/Relationship Question-Advice Being Seeked

".

I hope you've seeked out a good editor for those books you want published!

As for the prom advice, It's your prom and you should be able to go with whomever you decide. Are you going to let your parents and sister arrange your marriage when that times comes also? It isn't a good idea to ask this other young lady to go even as friends, since you clearly have feelings for her even though she is in a relationship. I think it's time to start asking yourself why you always seem to be drawn to girls who are unavailable.
My advice is to go with your friends. You will have more fun and perhaps find a single girl who also came with her friends that you can hang out with and later obsess over.

That is true, I don't know why my grammar slipped up there. That's weird.

Must've been typing too fast and not thinking.