All-time worst song.

[becca]

I think I have heard the worst song ever written, it is so bad I have never gotten past the second line of it. It's called Fifi The Flea. It goes "Fifi the flea, fell in love... with the son of two flea circus clowns." Sometimes I only get as far as the fell in love part before I just have to shut it off. I thought Muskrat Love by Captain & Teneille (sp?) was pretty noxious but this flea business is even riper. It's on an Everly Brothers album where they are backed by The Hollies, and it is members of The Hollies responsible for this inexcusably twee yet sappily sad horror. I wouldn't even unleash it on N. Korea! Perhaps Nash and Clarke and Hicks were trying to go even lower than the Everlys' Ebony Eyes (where was Bob Welch back when he was most urgently needed?), in which case they succeeded gloriously as it is truly awful.

There are some very bad songs. I'm Just A Lonely Teenager by some very white sounding Dion & The Belmonts doo-wop wannabees is excruciating. It makes the song the Peanut Sisters sing to Mothra seem hip. Even Wolverton Mountain and Running Bear Loves Little White Dove almost seem passable next to I'm Just A Lonely Teenager.

If anyone can reach lower than Fifi The Flea I would be astonished, but are there any lists of the worst songs ever written? Have any been used in actual combat? Perhaps a Jack Black fan would know...