Holiday Blues - Page 3

amber · #31 11-16-2005, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MoonChilde

Wow..seems that we all suffer from the holiday blues in one form or another..Thanks everyone for sharing your thoughts and stories..I am going to try really hard to pull myself out of this funk and look around and see that there is so much to be thankful for and quit dwelling on the things I have no control over.There is so much going on in the world these days ,lets all try to make our small corner of the world a little bit more bearable..Hugs to all

Hope you feel better.

I don't really suffer from Holiday Blues, though. In fact, Xmas is my favorite Holiday. I get presents, I sing Xmas songs, and sometimes it snows a little at my parents house, and I take the dog for walks in the snow, and we follow deer tracks into the forest, and mom decorates the christmas pole (A pole she carved all these designs in) and my dad does the whole yard with really pretty lights. Then we sit around, and don't talk much. I start drooling on myself as I gorge on Cable T.V.....it's pretty cool. My mom hates xmas, so that sucks, but I ignore her or roll my eyes if she says anything like that, or I say "well, quit telling us, we don't hate it!" and it all works out.
Okay, I'll stop.

sara1998 · #32 11-16-2005, 08:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jannieC

Christmas has been really rough for me the last few years- this year is the first year my husband is drug-free (he was in rehab last year for 6 months) so I am just so happy that he is alive and doing so remarkably well.

Congrats to the hubby! That's wonderful news!

Richard B · #33 11-17-2005, 04:11 PM

Poor little Snowman...he's got the blues so bad.

sparky · #34 11-17-2005, 04:52 PM

For a few years I hated the holidays. And that was when my family was all still alive. Some of them didn't get along, and so when I came to town, it was MY problem to deal with. I had to run my ass all over town to spend a reasonable time with each warring faction and it made me crazy. I did that for about two years. Then I got pissed. Everyone got me for an hour. I simply said, "I only have so much time, and it isn't my fault that you don't get along with___. So, because you all hate each other and won't talk, I only have an hour for each of you. Sorry." I lied and told them I was only in town for two days. Did they change ? NO. Did my time become more enjoyable ? Absolutely.

It was kind of a bummer, but taught me quite a bit about setting boundaries in general and not eating dirt for other people's problems. It was during that time that I started to spend more of my holidays with my best friend and that family. I had tons of fun with them. And still do. I didn't consciously create a new tradition. However, I was so angry, depressed, and resentful over the fact that it was no longer a fun time of year for me, something had to be done. My best friend agreed, and so we did a little thing and now we have a blast every year. Her family drives HER nuts, but I love them. When most of my family died, they became a safety net. And as the boyfriends have come and gone, Stevie, they have remained. Don't know what I will do when God Forbid, they start dying off. Thankfully the kids are my age.

Also, I toss a party every year. I have even done it when I couldn't afford it. It is mostly for people who work for me and with me, but others come too. Sometimes, it is the only time I see people who used to be a part of my everyday life. I miss all of them, but don't always work with them, so that has become something I look forward to in a big bad way. And they all love it too.

Anyway, that is what I do. I feel for anyone who has a sad time during this part of the year. I send a big

to all of you. But, I am living proof that you can transform it and reclaim it.

One year, I joined two book clubs and two record clubs in November because I was poor. Everyone got books and cd's that year.

I did what I had to do. I did it Myyyy waaaaaaay.

amber · #35 11-17-2005, 05:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sparky

Some of them didn't get along, and so when I came to town, it was MY problem to deal with. I had to run my ass all over town to spend a reasonable time with each warring faction and it made me crazy. I did that for about two years. Then I got pissed. Everyone got me for an hour. I simply said, "I only have so much time, and it isn't my fault that you don't get along with___. So, because you all hate each other and won't talk, I only have an hour for each of you. Sorry." I lied and told them I was only in town for two days. Did they change ? NO. Did my time become more enjoyable ? Absolutely.

That's weird, that's how my fam has been for about 7 years, and that's the person I am, too - the only one everyone likes. Except the clusters live in different towns.
Two years ago or so, on Thanksgiving, my aunt and I got into a big emotional "fight" (she was emotional, and drinking) about why my mom won't talk to any of them - as if I could explain my mom.

She was really hurt. But then when I was trying to explain anything at all, she'd be like "you talk just like your mom - why can't you speak plainly?" Basically saying I was talking down to her, when I wasn't, and also really mad about it. (She's my mom's half sister, and my mom is "the smart one"). Anyway, so she insulted me that way.
I've just gone to my parent's since, if I go anywhere. Also, my grandma doesn't like her own sister, but my mom does.

It's all totally lame. I don't deal with it, either.

strandinthewind · #36 11-17-2005, 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sparky

For a few years I hated the holidays. And that was when my family was all still alive. Some of them didn't get along, and so when I came to town, it was MY problem to deal with. I had to run my ass all over town to spend a reasonable time with each warring faction and it made me crazy. I did that for about two years. Then I got pissed. Everyone got me for an hour. I simply said, "I only have so much time, and it isn't my fault that you don't get along with___. So, because you all hate each other and won't talk, I only have an hour for each of you. Sorry." I lied and told them I was only in town for two days. Did they change ? NO. Did my time become more enjoyable ? Absolutely.

It was kind of a bummer, but taught me quite a bit about setting boundaries in general and not eating dirt for other people's problems. It was during that time that I started to spend more of my holidays with my best friend and that family. I had tons of fun with them. And still do. I didn't consciously create a new tradition. However, I was so angry, depressed, and resentful over the fact that it was no longer a fun time of year for me, something had to be done. My best friend agreed, and so we did a little thing and now we have a blast every year. Her family drives HER nuts, but I love them. When most of my family died, they became a safety net. And as the boyfriends have come and gone, Stevie, they have remained. Don't know what I will do when God Forbid, they start dying off. Thankfully the kids are my age.

Also, I toss a party every year. I have even done it when I couldn't afford it. It is mostly for people who work for me and with me, but others come too. Sometimes, it is the only time I see people who used to be a part of my everyday life. I miss all of them, but don't always work with them, so that has become something I look forward to in a big bad way. And they all love it too.

Anyway, that is what I do. I feel for anyone who has a sad time during this part of the year. I send a big

to all of you. But, I am living proof that you can transform it and reclaim it.

One year, I joined two book clubs and two record clubs in November because I was poor. Everyone got books and cd's that year.

I did what I had to do. I did it Myyyy waaaaaaay.

Lord Child - I do not do family drama - EVER. Fortunately, mine all get along. Of course, we are WASP's so there are not that many of us.

Also, I expect an invitation to your party. My date could be both my date and the entertainment

You, of course, are invited to mine, if I have it this year now that my former residence and beloved piano (which I usually got up on in red and belted a few after having a few) are gone

Finally, I know many get down in the dumps in the holiday season. I choose to concentrate on the positive which is, for my generally happy self, not that hard, though it is for other's and I have certainly been there in my own way.

On edit - there is also my annual two martini lunch followed by the shopping excursion - followed by gift wrapping (if the store did not) at home with more cocktails, Scotties to assist, and gay Christmas music "HAUL OUT THE HOLLY"

SuzeQuze · #37 11-18-2005, 07:52 AM

Thanks Jason, Sparky, and everyone for sharing how you stay positive through the holidays. This thread has been very helpful. Deck the halls with boughs of holly falalalalaaaa...

Raeven Skye · #38 11-18-2005, 10:46 AM

well..thru a twist of fate, i ended up in the Christmas section of Target yesterday, and i started looking at coolie things, and ornaments, and then i saw the trees all lit up, and i realized i was smiling, and planning presents, so maybe...just maybe...it will be ok. I've felt so alone for the past few months, that I think it's done me a lot of good to come here, and realize that I'm not alone at all. I hope the sun shines on all of us this season!