I am so sad right now

[GODDESS6]

this is so sad, my thought s& prayers are w/ you & your friend paula & i think it shows how compassionate you are that it breaks your heart this much, she has a great friend in you!!!~ as a mother, i just san't fathom this ~

[Red]

Allow yourself to feel this loss and know that is your loss, hers and everyone who knew Jack and therefore you should join together in your grief. Be there for her as only a true friend can be.

My thoughts are with you. I can only imagine how difficult this is.

[estranged4life]

Originally Posted by skcin

I don't want sympathy, or advice, or anything, and I certainly don't want to burden any of you or make you feel bad. I just needed to vent, so thanks.

Go ahead and vent...It helps to get the feelings you have out instead of letting 'em build (I called my sister Lesa today because I needed to vent badly about Mom's death...I needed to have someone calm the feelings I have which could be "harmful to others" if left unchecked.)

Just hang in there ok?

[goldustsongbird]

Originally Posted by skcin

Thanks, guys. I feel so stupid, it's not really MY loss at all, it's my friends'. But this has really thrown me for a loop. I mean, of course I should be upset, but this upset? It's freaking me out a little. Maybe it's because of the fact that the two of us go so far back, I went to high school with her and her husband. 15 years is a long time to know someone. I don't know. Again, thank you.

Understandable. I don't think you're overreacting. Sometimes stuff like this is a real wake up call-- My best friend's mother died about a week before Christmas, and I'd never even met the woman, and I was just totally torn up over it. I think what really got to me was the fact that, for the first time I couldn't honestly tell her I knew what she was going through. You just feel really helpless in situations like that. I was freaked out for awhile, too.

[Stephanie]

No advice to offer, just wanted to say my thoughts are with you, as you are both her friend and a very compassionate nurse, I am sure this hit you hard.

[Lee]

I understand how you feel. When my great niece was born, it was such a joyous occasion. I went to see her in the hospital; she was the cutest little thing. About a week later, she died of some kind of infection. Everyone was extremely shocked, including me. I mean, yeah, she wasn't mine, but just being there to see her & then she was gone. . . I was sad for some time after that. It's just something that you can't get over quickly. I still can't believe it. Now my niece is pregnant again & she having a girl! And I pray nothing happens.

Lee

[jannieC]

Originally Posted by sara1998

The thing I've learned with grieving families is not to offer help, just do it. Take dinner to their home. They don't feel like cooking. Bring some groceries. Run any errand. When I was knee deep in grief, I didn't ask anyone for anything, because I felt like a burden. I will be sure to pray for all of you. Keep your head up, Paula.

This is SUCH good advice. (((hug)))

My friend's son-in-law accidentally suffocated their nine month old baby a few months ago. It *is* devastating. I'm so sorry this happened. I hope that your friend will eventually get some professional help with this- this is something that is close to impossible to deal with alone.

[amber]

I'm sorry, friend.
I was pretty much going to say the same thing as Maria. I think cooking and errand running are much appreciated for a lot of people.
I hope you feel less sad soon.
*hugs*

[WelshWitchPMD]

I am sorry to hear this Paula. I will keep your friend in my thoughts. That is a loss that I can't even imagine. She is lucky to have you as a caring friend.
You are right when you say that things can change in an instant and when you think about it it is kind of scary.

[macfanken]

Oh, how sad. I can't even imagine the pain.

[Johnny Stew]

My deepest sympathies go out to Jack's parents and family, and everyone who loves them and loved him.

Of all the cruel things life can throw at someone, I can't think of anything more cruel than to lose a child.

[skcin]

Originally Posted by jannieC

This is SUCH good advice. (((hug)))

My friend's son-in-law accidentally suffocated their nine month old baby a few months ago. It *is* devastating. I'm so sorry this happened. I hope that your friend will eventually get some professional help with this- this is something that is close to impossible to deal with alone.

Oh. My God. That's unbearable.

Thanks for the thoughts, you guys. I spoke with another mutual friend yesterday & she's having as much difficulty with this as I am. Felt good to talk to someone who is going throught the same thing.

[jkmaletic]

I'm sorry Paula. I know how sad it can be. I had a little brother die at 11 days old. It's very tragic. I was 16 when it happened. I remember thinking, did I do something to make this happen? "Why" is a huge question during times like these. I found comfort in talking to a priest during that time. As far as what you can do, just try to be strong for her is my best advice...

[SuzeQuze]

Originally Posted by jkmaletic

I'm sorry Paula. I know how sad it can be. I had a little brother die at 11 days old. It's very tragic. I was 16 when it happened. I remember thinking, did I do something to make this happen? "Why" is a huge question during times like these. I found comfort in talking to a priest during that time. As far as what you can do, just try to be strong for her is my best advice...

I'm so sorry about your brother. My nana lost her first daughter Susan when she was an infant. My extended family was afraid that my parents named me Susan when I was born but I remained healthy. It is such a sad sad thing to lose a child. When I was 16 the state of my hair would devastate me so I can only imagine how it was to try to cope with that kind of loss.