How Old Is Too Old To Lose Your Virginity?? - Page 2

SortaSavageLike · #1 11-01-2005, 08:44 PM

126 years.

Hey, I like to be optimistic from time to time!

BTFLCHLD · #2 11-01-2005, 11:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by amber

no one will know about your sh**, and no one will be talking about it all around

my amber how times have changed!

hehe

you know that was funny

spanksmelaterz!

ryan8472 · #3 11-01-2005, 06:43 PM

I was 14. So I can't really comment.

Tho I would think that if it hadn't happened after about 30 years, something may be amiss.

Jyqm · #4 11-01-2005, 06:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by foxyluva

Hey guys, i had an interesting conversation with my friend about losing your virginity - he said that he lost his at 14, and he was told by friends that that was a really old age to lose it, and alot of them lost it at 11 and 12. Now we are both 19, and im still one

but the only difference is im gay, and he is straight (many of you will know how difficult that can be when growing up) - so my question to you is, what age is still having your virginity kind of weird?? How Old Is Too Old??

Good lord. I thought this was going to be some comical thread about some fifty-year-old who was just itching to finally lose it but thought maybe it was too late and they ought to just throw in the towel.

14 is a very young age to be having sex, and 11 or 12 is just ridiculous. I don't think I even figured out masturbation until I was 12. I would guess that some of your friend's friends were just flat out lying. Otherwise that's a bit disturbing. I really doubt that many or any 12 or 14 year olds are remotely mature enough to be able to deal with the incredible responsibility - both physical and emotional - that sex entails.

Losing your virginity isn't like getting your voter registration card or buying a pack of cigarettes. There's no pre-set age beyond which you really should have had sex already. You should lose your virginity when you find a person that you care about enough - and who cares about you enough - to want to have that kind of relationship with.

If someone is in their 30s or 40s and are still a virgin, I think what's "weird" isn't that they've never had sex, per se, but that they've never had a mature, serious romantic relationship (of which sex tends to be a part).

Bottom line: There's nothing "weird" about being a 19 year old virgin. There are lots of people in their twenties who are still virgins, many of them by choice. There's actually a growing abstinence (until marriage, of course) movement in the US.

EDIT: Does this post make it seem like I think sex outside the confines of a serious relationship is wrong? I don't really believe that, though I think it's something that is often important for a first experience - it's always easier venturing into unknown waters in the security that a relationship can bring. Beyond that, though, if you're into casual sex, knock yourself out. Not that anybody here really cares what I think or needs me to approve of their sex lives, or vice versa.

Serendipity · #5 11-01-2005, 06:57 PM

Personally, and I really do mean its just my view, I couldnt have chosen to wait until marriage. I'm not particularly religious, and well, I'm only human. But I really do think its best to wait until you're with somone you care for and who cares for you. And that you are both willing to accept that its a lot of fun but can and does have consequences. I'm glad I did it when I did, and I have no regrets even if that relationship didnt work out because it was right for me. If that time had come 10 or 15 years later for me, I would still have waited to be in that relationship.

11 or 12? Lord, that just freaks me out. More so because I know it does happen!

~Nicki

On edit - to agree with Jyqm.....nothing to say sex is only ok in a relastionship. To each their own amongst consenting and careful adults. But for a first time...yeah it might be better to wait for that security of a good relationship

SuzeQuze · #6 11-01-2005, 07:03 PM

I don't think there's anything weird about being a 19 year old virgin. That is still very young and I'm sure it is normal. People talk a good talk about sex but who knows what the truth is. I know things have gotten much looser lately and it is sad. If I had it to do over again I would wait wait wait!!! When you know who you are as a person and are comfortable with that and have something to share then that may be a good time. I think early sex really messes with your identity. Especially if you pick a sociopath.

wondergirl9847 · #7 11-01-2005, 07:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SuzeQuze

I think early sex really messes with your identity. Especially if you pick a sociopath.

Then, I don't really think sex is what you need to be worrying about.

LOL

SuzeQuze · #8 11-01-2005, 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wondergirl9847

Then, I don't really think sex is what you need to be worrying about.

LOL

Haha! I was really unlucky and the BF was a lying bastard who had no capacity for empathy or real caring. Isn't that swell?

xdreamsunwindx · #9 11-01-2005, 08:09 PM

Humping on the parking meter's always fun.

*g* nobody gets it yay!

cliffdweller · #11 11-02-2005, 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SuzeQuze

If I had it to do over again I would wait wait wait!!! When you know who you are as a person and are comfortable with that and have something to share then that may be a good time.

I couldn't agree more. I think the first time, when you're a teenager, is usually uncomfortable and awkward because a.) you don't really know what you want or what your partner wants and b.) you both are not sexually mature enough to even really KNOW what pleasures you both

, well, seriously, sex is about enjoyment and pleasure, and an emotional investment (to some, not all) so when you're a teenager (and even in your early 20's) you don't know enough about yourself or your body (or your partner's) to make those judgements or understand what they even mean. Man, I'm about to turn 30 and I'm SOOOO stoked because I'm finally learning these things...man, desire, sexual forthrightness when you're in your late 20's to early 30's means something SOOOOOOO much different than when you're a teenager or early 20's. I like to call it "sexual agency," everyone should strive for it.

SuzeQuze · #12 11-02-2005, 12:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cliffdweller

I couldn't agree more. I think the first time, when you're a teenager, is usually uncomfortable and awkward because a.) you don't really know what you want or what your partner wants and b.) you both are not sexually mature enough to even really KNOW what pleasures you both

, well, seriously, sex is about enjoyment and pleasure, and an emotional investment (to some, not all) so when you're a teenager (and even in your early 20's) you don't know enough about yourself or your body (or your partner's) to make those judgements or understand what they even mean. Man, I'm about to turn 30 and I'm SOOOO stoked because I'm finally learning these things...man, desire, sexual forthrightness when you're in your late 20's to early 30's means something SOOOOOOO much different than when you're a teenager or early 20's. I like to call it "sexual agency," everyone should strive for it.

Right, plus for me it clouded my judgement. I put him before all else. What a dumb thing for a teen to do!

estranged4life · #13 11-03-2005, 05:35 PM

I waited til I was in a steady relationship for over 2+ years before my ex-fiancee Christy & I 'did the deed'...Btw, I intentionally waited til I was in my 20's.

sara1998 · #14 11-01-2005, 09:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jyqm

I would guess that some of your friend's friends were just flat out lying. Otherwise that's a bit disturbing. I really doubt that many or any 12 or 14 year olds are remotely mature enough to be able to deal with the incredible responsibility - both physical and emotional - that sex entails.

I'm here to tell you, 12-14 year old children are in no way capable of handling the emotional or physical aspects of sex. If they have or are having sex at that age, it's peer pressure, or, there's something wrong going on at home. A lot of kids that age say they're doing it, and lying about it, to feel like they're cool. It is disturbing. I'm too embarrassed to tell when I lost mine, but, if you're too young like I was, you'll feel self conscious about it for years to come. I only wish that when I was 19 I could honestly say I was still a virgin. Be proud of yourself you've held out for so long, and don't worry that you are too old. When you find the right one, you'll know when it's time!

sparky · #15 11-01-2005, 09:27 PM

Ho****. I was very young. But I won't go into that. Also - how do you want to define virginity ?

Most kids under 18 do not have the emotional maturity to deal with sex under 18, but it doesn't stop them. Didn't stop me. And thankfully I wasn't in the arena to be getting anyone pregnant. It can definitely mess up girls, as they tend to place more of an emotional investment on sex. But too old ? I would say in your 20's is probably pushing it, but if you aren't ready, you aren't ready.
Everyone has different priorites and frankly sex means many different things to different people.