Feuds

[sara1998]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who has a disfunctional family... but I'm sorry all of you go through this ****.

My grandmother, on my mom's side is one big bitch. See, my mom's mom's side of the family reminds me of the troll with their extreme right views. They are holier-than-thou, and don't dare tell them any different. My grandmother has always treated my mom like ****. She has never liked my dad because he don't take **** from no one, including her. And, of coarse, I'm not good enough either, because I'm my fathers daughter, and I won't take her **** either. So, rewind back to my Jason's funeral. This is when I basically cut off all contact with grandma. She came up to Indiana (she lives in Tennessee) for the funeral. So, when she got here, a few days before the funeral, she was around basically while I was planning it. I buried him in a t-shirt and blue jeans, becasue he would not be comfortable buried in a suit and tie. (call me crazy, it's how I think) I also had a closed casket to spare Sara of any unwanted trauma. Well, grandma first threw a fit because he was not "dressed up" to meet his maker, and went on to bitch because it was a closed casket. She could'nt see him. WTF? She told the rest of the family that I said not to bother sending flowers, because I didn't want them. Needless to say, she went home the day before the funeral. Things didn't go her way.

Now, I just lost my favorite grandfather 2 Saturdays ago when I was in California. This is grandma's ex-husband, my mom's dad. I love her dad's side of the family. They are the partiers. Put it this way, grandpa was buried with his cigarettes, lighter, and a fifth of vodka. Grandma came up from Tennessee showing her ass again, about in the same way she did at Jason's funeral. Her and my dad really got into it, and grandma told my dad that she will be sure that she takes my mom away from him. My folks have been married 29 years now. I'm sure mom's not going anywhere! LOL... No one is talking to her now. She's damn lucky I was out of state because I would have went the f*ck off on her. She's one of those if it's not her way, she's pissed off about it. NEver mind that this is her ex-husband of 40 years..... I have cut off all contact with her, and could care less if I ever speak to her again.

[Mari]

^Sara1998 Some people sure know to choose the worst moments, don't they? Jesus, she should mind her own f*cking business if you ask me!

Last funeral I went to was my grandmom (mom's side of the family) last year. That's when my dad decided to show up unannounced. Hadn't seen him before that for over 10 years and would like to keep it that way. Yeah he picked a great moment too. He was grovelling before us, me and my mum.. oh so pitiful. But the next time I heard of him he was trying to get his way, manipulating and bossing me around just as he'd always done. I guess I'm glad to've seen him again and have a new image of him (grey old scruffy pitiful man) instead of that man I was scared of in my childhood, though. 'kay, enough personal stuff for today

[sara1998]

Originally Posted by Mari

^Sara1998 Some people sure know to choose the worst moments, don't they? Jesus, she should mind her own f*cking business if you ask me!

Last funeral I went to was my grandmom (mom's side of the family) last year. That's when my dad decided to show up unannounced. Hadn't seen him before that for over 10 years and would like to keep it that way. Yeah he picked a great moment too. He was grovelling before us, me and my mum.. oh so pitiful. But the next time I heard of him he was trying to get his way, manipulating and bossing me around just as he'd always done. I guess I'm glad to've seen him again and have a new image of him (grey old scruffy pitiful man) instead of that man I was scared of in my childhood, though. 'kay, enough personal stuff for today

Maybe your dad and my grandma should get togther. Sounds like they'd be good for eachother......

[Mari]

[EnchantedSLN]

I don't think I have any feuds.

There are a lot in my family though. My grandmother's brother died several years ago, and his children had him cremated and spread his ashes according to his final wishes. In the Jewish faith, you're not supposed to do this. So, my grandmother was very upset about it and saw it as a slap in the face to her brother's life and religion, even though it was apparently what he wanted. She cut all ties with them and has refused to acknowledge them as part of our family ever since. She has Alzheimer's now and can't remember much of anything anymore, but she still remembers that she hates them all . (She also blamed his death on them, to an extent. He died of a cocaine overdose and she felt it was their fault for not getting their father the help he needed before it was too late.)

One of my grandmother's sisters, Vicki, was killed under mysterious circumstances about 15 years ago. The investigation never led anywhere, but my family is convinced the man she was living with at the time had something to do with it. There was a fair amount of money involved. Her daughter seemed to know some details that she wasn't giving up, so she has subsequently been excluded from the family too.

Also, we used to be really close to one of my mother's cousins... when my parents got divorced and my mom & I had to make an unexpected move across the country (abusive situation, big mess), she allowed us to live in one of their homes (yes, plural) in Scottsdale for 1 year so that my mom could get on her feet somewhere where my dad wouldn't think to look, and then permanently move to California where most of her family was. Her cousin even came out and stayed with us for about 4 months of that year to show my mom around and help her find a new job and get me in school and stuff. When we moved out at the end of that year, the cousin's husband said some really unsavory stuff to my mom (about how he didn't know why they were helping his wife's trashy family blah blah blah). Said cousin didn't say a word in defense of us, so that was a sore spot between her & my mom for a long time. It irked me because she was like an aunt to me and while I was naturally defensive of my mom, she had always been good to me & I didn't want to completely lose touch with her. This was a long time ago and things have simmered down a bit... I've visited her numerous times over the years and her and my mom are on civil terms, but they'll never be real close again.

Wait, was that my family or a synopsis for a Lifetime movie marathon?

[darklinensuit]

Originally Posted by EnchantedSLN

One of my grandmother's sisters, Vicki, was killed under mysterious circumstances about 15 years ago. The investigation never led anywhere, but my family is convinced the man she was living with at the time had something to do with it. There was a fair amount of money involved. Her daughter seemed to know some details that she wasn't giving up, so she has subsequently been excluded from the family too.

It's so nice when money strengthens family ties, isn't it?
My mother's two sisters fought over my grandmother's diamond ring and her fair coat.
The older sister got (took) the ring, though she & her mother hadn't spoken for years. The younger sister was the only one to have kept contact with my grandmother, so my mother said to let her have it. The older sister didn't comply.
In terms of the mink, all three sisters wanted it. It was too small on the oldest sister, too big on the youngest sister, and fit my mom perfectly. The oldest sister took it.
I am proud to say that my mother got past these petty issues and found more important reasons not to talk to either sister years later.

- Jake

[darklinensuit]

Originally Posted by sara1998

I'm glad I'm not the only one who has a disfunctional family... but I'm sorry all of you go through this ****.

My grandmother, on my mom's side is one big bitch. See, my mom's mom's side of the family reminds me of the troll with their extreme right views. They are holier-than-thou, and don't dare tell them any different. My grandmother has always treated my mom like ****. She has never liked my dad because he don't take **** from no one, including her. And, of coarse, I'm not good enough either, because I'm my fathers daughter, and I won't take her **** either. So, rewind back to my Jason's funeral. This is when I basically cut off all contact with grandma. She came up to Indiana (she lives in Tennessee) for the funeral. So, when she got here, a few days before the funeral, she was around basically while I was planning it. I buried him in a t-shirt and blue jeans, becasue he would not be comfortable buried in a suit and tie. (call me crazy, it's how I think) I also had a closed casket to spare Sara of any unwanted trauma. Well, grandma first threw a fit because he was not "dressed up" to meet his maker, and went on to bitch because it was a closed casket. She could'nt see him. WTF? She told the rest of the family that I said not to bother sending flowers, because I didn't want them. Needless to say, she went home the day before the funeral. Things didn't go her way.

Now, I just lost my favorite grandfather 2 Saturdays ago when I was in California. This is grandma's ex-husband, my mom's dad. I love her dad's side of the family. They are the partiers. Put it this way, grandpa was buried with his cigarettes, lighter, and a fifth of vodka. Grandma came up from Tennessee showing her ass again, about in the same way she did at Jason's funeral. Her and my dad really got into it, and grandma told my dad that she will be sure that she takes my mom away from him. My folks have been married 29 years now. I'm sure mom's not going anywhere! LOL... No one is talking to her now. She's damn lucky I was out of state because I would have went the f*ck off on her. She's one of those if it's not her way, she's pissed off about it. NEver mind that this is her ex-husband of 40 years..... I have cut off all contact with her, and could care less if I ever speak to her again.

Wow, sorry you had to deal with that foolishness at such a difficult time. My mother's mother was something of a horror as well, to the point where I never met her even though we lived in the same city & I was ten when she died.

- Jake