Musician Controversy

[David]

Originally Posted by michelej1

I just saw this comment from Neil Giraldo in a Pat Benatar biography. I laughed because it makes it sound like in the wake of the FM break ups, musicians world wide got into ethical debates with each other about whether or not band mates should sleep together, weighing the pros and cons and supporting their views with scientific evidence.

http://wmmo.com/dcs/insiderocknroll_pb.html

The new band eventually relocated to Southern California to work on their debut album In The Heat Of The Night and then hit the road. Neil said of their romance, "It happened probably a week into the tour. And initially it seemed taboo. Generally nobody had relationships like that in bands because it tended to destroy them. That's why the situation in Fleetwood Mac was so controversial among musicians. --- Overall it was a risky maneuver, but the success of our relationship has always been this sense of partnership, of each of us doing our part and our best."

I think Geraldo hits the nail on the head. So much of the talk about FM -- even from the fans -- centers on relations that broke up & had to keep working together. Hogwash. That isn't the crux. Millions of parents get divorced & have to "keep working together" as much as if not far more so than Stevie & Lindsey in the care & upkeep of children. That isn't the big deal in this context (it's a big deal otherwise). The big deal, as musicians themselves have always known, is romantic relations within bands. There's just something about being in a band -- & no one experiencing it has really been able to define it to others -- that does very weird things to a person's psyche, & the weirdness (Mick called it psychic jiu-jitsu) encompasses far more than romantic feelings -- it's also intellectual because you bring a huge part of your mental abilities into the situation as demonstrated by singing or playing music or songwriting -- think of how touchy people here on the ledge can be about posting a song they wrote or a recording they made or something they did artistically or intellectually. There is ALL of that mixed up in a huge, boiling cauldron in a band, & there is a proscription in most bands against romantic relations (even if that proscription is unheeded). It's for a very good reason, although it's hard for anyone to verbalize.

In a band, everyone's ego is thirty times more sensitive than it normally is.