Would you want to know?

[HomerMcvie]

Originally Posted by amber

No, and both have fully functional hips. And even better, most of their original range intact. I think my mom still dances as good as ever, too.

Wonder what happened to Stevie? No singing range, and a bad hip. It's like she's 75!

[chiliD]

Originally Posted by skcin

If had the chance to learn the exact date on which you'll die, would you?

I have and survived the process 3 times already (December 9, 2004)

[gldstwmn]

Baby, I don't want to know. I think I would live my life as though that date would be the defining moment. We're not supposed to know.

[GODDESS6]

Originally Posted by skcin

If had the chance to learn the exact date on which you'll die, would you? What about less specific - would you want to know the year? Or how old you'll be?

no friggin' way ~

[carrie721]

Originally Posted by amber

Interesting question. Thank god. I would totally want to know. I hope it would be soon, but after my parents die.

seriously?

Kind of weird, I was just thinking about this last night. Really the only reason I want to live much longer is because my parents would be totally sad if I died, esp. cause I'm an only child. They're only as old as Stevie, though, they could be around for 30 more years. Keep smoking, guys! They don't drink, though, I think that extends your life span.

Also I would want to know so I could do stuff. And little things, like - I was going to get a bike helmet, but maybe I don't have to, if I find out I'm not going to die from head splatter bike crash. And maybe I would hang glide or sky dive (I'll probably sky dive anyway) without being so scared. Plus I could make sure my house was clean and that there was nothing incriminating inside, and that I was wearing something cute. Or if I was going to get Cancer, I could start saving.

but the problem with finding out you're going to live to be 80 or whatever and being reckless is that there's always the possibility of seriously injuring yourself and being a vegetable for, like, 40 years. THAT would be my worst nightmare.

[amber]

Originally Posted by carrie721

seriously?

Why not? Life is boring and hard. Well, my life is, I know many people who have seemingly much more fun lives. I'm not actually too bored day to day, but objectively I should be. It will only get more difficult and dull the older and uglier I get. At least it is fun to look pretty and wear clothes and have sex.

If I won lotto or something, I'd surely change my mind. Because then I could go wherever I wanted and do whatever I wanted. I'd probably have more friends, too. It's not that I'm suicidal, in the classic sense of being in despair and all that, so don't worry. I'm fairly happy, tell truth - oddly. It just all seems so pointless yet painful yet boring, punctuated by random bouts of fear.

And I'll always be the same, or similar to myself, most likely. So probably many of my life patterns will repeat. I could transform to a point, but it would be hard. Basically I mean that it will probably always be similar to how it is now, and how it has been before, all my life. It's not really worth it. Dying is natural, though - I fear pain much much more than dying.

Originally Posted by carrie721

but the problem with finding out you're going to live to be 80 or whatever and being reckless is that there's always the possibility of seriously injuring yourself and being a vegetable for, like, 40 years. THAT would be my worst nightmare.

I didn't even think of that! That would be the worst thing ever. Or if you were crippled. I would hate to be crippled. I mean physically. There would have to be a clause in the knowing, to tell about being crippled or a veggie, too.

[HomerMcvie]

Originally Posted by amber

Why not? Life is boring and hard. Well, my life is, I know many people who have seemingly much more fun lives. I'm not actually too bored day to day, but objectively I should be. It will only get more difficult and dull the older and uglier I get. At least it is fun to look pretty and wear clothes and have sex.

If I won lotto or something, I'd surely change my mind. Because then I could go wherever I wanted and do whatever I wanted. I'd probably have more friends, too. It's not that I'm suicidal, in the classic sense of being in despair and all that, so don't worry. I'm fairly happy, tell truth - oddly. It just all seems so pointless yet painful yet boring, punctuated by random bouts of fear.

Wow, hell has frozen over. I agree with your points, 100%. ALTHOUGH, I absolutely won't let myself dwell on it. And you're right, life does suck alot more, the older you get. Real jobs, responsibility, mortgages, getting ugly (and thicker), all your friends get married with children and move away.
I don't have 10% the fun that I had when I was 20. And god I miss that.
I'm depressed now.
Wait, where's my wine?
OH, it's right there!
I feel much better now.

[amber]

Originally Posted by HomerMcvie

Wow, hell has frozen over. I agree with your points, 100%. ALTHOUGH, I absolutely won't let myself dwell on it. And you're right, life does suck alot more, the older you get. Real jobs, responsibility, mortgages, getting ugly (and thicker), all your friends get married with children and move away.
I don't have 10% the fun that I had when I was 20. And god I miss that.
I'm depressed now.
Wait, where's my wine?
OH, it's right there!
I feel much better now.

Score, wine!

Yeah, you don't have to be depressed about it, really. It's just normal. You can still have as much fun as you can have, which is cool.
The less you think about the fun you aren't having, or bad stuff, or things that you could whine about, the more fun you have. Like I said, I'm pretty happy. Lots of little things make me happy, so that works out well. The world really is interesting to think about, and information is so accessible, that there is kind of always something to do. Like it is more interesting to find out ways to fix your problems then it is to whine about them, plus then you also won't be as bored, because you are doing something.
Whatever, it all works out.

For instance, right now I am excited because I am going to buy groceries, and having a nice late, quiet bike ride to do so. I have money to buy stuff I want, I really like to grocery shop, and I'm on South Beach phase one, so the whole thing is kind of like a fun self improvement activity. Then I get to eat, which always rocks.

[HomerMcvie]

Originally Posted by amber

Score, wine!

Yeah, you don't have to be depressed about it, really. It's just normal. You can still have as much fun as you can have, which is cool.
The less you think about the fun you aren't having, or bad stuff, or things that you could whine about, the more fun you have. Like I said, I'm pretty happy. Lots of little things make me happy, so that works out well. The world really is interesting to think about, and information is so accessible, that there is kind of always something to do. Like it is more interesting to find out ways to fix your problems then it is to whine about them, plus then you also won't be as bored, because you are doing something.
Whatever, it all works out.

For instance, right now I am excited because I am going to buy groceries, and having a nice late, quiet bike ride to do so. I have money to buy stuff I want, I really like to grocery shop, and I'm on South Beach phase one, so the whole thing is kind of like a fun self improvement activity. Then I get to eat, which always rocks.

Eating DOES always rock
And I'm not depressed about it, but REMEMBERING how much fun life WAS at 20, IS kinda depressing. But, whatcha gonna do? Waste your time being depressed? Funk that!
Now, wine glasses UP!

[sparky]

Originally Posted by amber

It will only get more difficult and dull the older and uglier I get. At least it is fun to look pretty and wear clothes and have sex.

NO **** on all those points.

If I won lotto or something, I'd surely change my mind. Because then I could go wherever I wanted and do whatever I wanted. I'd probably have more friends, too.

Not true. I haven't won the lotto, but a lot more money doesn't matter. It's your POV that matters. And money can't change that. The more money you have, the more pressure you have to keep it. And that begets stress and pressure. Trust me.

Dying is natural, though - I fear pain much much more than dying.

No joke. I am not afraid at all of dying. It will be a relief. Sleep forever and no worries ! AWESOME ! I do not want to die at all. Not now. But I am not afraid of it. It'll be cool. Can't wait to see what happens. Even if it's nothing.

I just don't want to suffer. Sparky wants morphine ! I have great insurance and a great doctor. It shouldn't be a problem. We've had that conversation already. I hope to just stroke out or something. But if I get cancer or some other lingering thing, I am on a friggin morphine ride to the end...yeeeehaw ! I am gonna hit home plate with a cocktail in one hand, a cigarette in the other, and a big ole grin on my face.

[sparky]

Originally Posted by HomerMcvie

Eating DOES always rock
And I'm not depressed about it, but REMEMBERING how much fun life WAS at 20, IS kinda depressing. But, whatcha gonna do? Waste your time being depressed? Funk that!
Now, wine glasses UP!

40 is better than 20. For me anyway. But, glasses up !

[HomerMcvie]

Originally Posted by sparky

Not true. I haven't won the lotto, but a lot more money doesn't matter. It's your POV that matters. And money can't change that. The more money you have, the more pressure you have to keep it. And that begets stress and pressure. Trust me.

Absolutely true(although winning mega bucks in the lottery would probably be LESS stressful). I know several milllionaires, and most of them live like paupers(it's usually the self-made ones living like this), SERIOUSLY hunting down penny-saving deals at the grocery store (you probably think I'm joking, I'm not).
I myself, am in debt so far in real estate, that I'm so cash poor(no pun intended), that most months I barely can pay all the bills. I do though, but it's a big struggle.
Money is the root of all evil.

[HomerMcvie]

Originally Posted by sparky

40 is better than 20. For me anyway. But, glasses up !

Really? All my friends(the one's that I truly felt close to) have pretty much all moved away. I only see them occasionally now. New friends now, in general, just have tooooo much baggage to put up with.
When I was 20, I was poor as ****, going to college, driving a $300 car, still living at home(because I couldn't have afforded anything else). And I was happy as a hog in a pile of ****! I had more friends than I could count, and every night was a party! Not just acquaintence (sp) friends, but people I'd known most of my life. They all just kinda drifted away(geographically speaking)........

[carrie721]

Originally Posted by amber

Why not? Life is boring and hard. Well, my life is, I know many people who have seemingly much more fun lives. I'm not actually too bored day to day, but objectively I should be. It will only get more difficult and dull the older and uglier I get. At least it is fun to look pretty and wear clothes and have sex.

If I won lotto or something, I'd surely change my mind. Because then I could go wherever I wanted and do whatever I wanted. I'd probably have more friends, too. It's not that I'm suicidal, in the classic sense of being in despair and all that, so don't worry. I'm fairly happy, tell truth - oddly. It just all seems so pointless yet painful yet boring, punctuated by random bouts of fear.

And I'll always be the same, or similar to myself, most likely. So probably many of my life patterns will repeat. I could transform to a point, but it would be hard. Basically I mean that it will probably always be similar to how it is now, and how it has been before, all my life. It's not really worth it. Dying is natural, though - I fear pain much much more than dying.

weird ... i have never felt that way about life. i joke about it, but i never really feel that way. and that's funny to me, because i've spent the last 11 years of my life dealing with severe depression. weird. i really am a closet wide-eyed optimist ... my boss told me the other day that my cynicism drives him "f*cking insane," but what's interesting is i'm not even all that cynical or flippant inside my head. it's all talk, and it's funny, and i like to be funny.

maybe life is pointless, but i don't like to dwell on that too much. maybe i just find other people so fascinating and weird that i don't worry about the meaninglessness of my own life. i do spend a lot of time watching other people and not a lot of time working on my own life. maybe that's just a defense mechanism protecting me from seeing how boring my life is. or maybe i'm just rambling because it's 2:45 and i'm worried about my sick dog. i gotta sleep.

[sparky]

Originally Posted by HomerMcvie

Really? All my friends(the one's that I truly felt close to) have pretty much all moved away. I only see them occasionally now. New friends now, in general, just have tooooo much baggage to put up with.

I was one of the people who moved away.
The ones who got married and bred I was never going to be close to anyway. It's just logistics. People who have kids only hang with people who have kids. It is the bane of the existence of every single one of my friends who stayed in my hometwon and didn't marry and breed. They are personna non grata with that set. Nothing left to talk about.
New friends are hard to make. It is true. If it isn't work, or someone I randomly have sex with and like, it's slim pickins. But, the newer friends I have found (less than 10 years) are strikingly similar to me, and we will be pals forever now.

When I was 20, I was poor as ****, going to college, driving a $300 car, still living at home(because I couldn't have afforded anything else). And I was happy as a hog in a pile of ****! I had more friends than I could count, and every night was a party! Not just acquaintence (sp) friends, but people I'd known most of my life. They all just kinda drifted away(geographically speaking)........

It's easy to romanticize the past. We're all guilty of it. I did kind of the same thing. I can only speak for myself, but I keep exhaustive journals. I was not as happy as I think I was in hindsight. I was worried about the future and pissed that I wasn't independent. Now is better. I know who I am and what I want. I have some power. I am way more f*ckable than I was then (much to my surprise). And I have money ! 40 kicks ass !