Random Thoughts/Express Yourself...Part II

[littlecricket2]

Originally Posted by estranged4life

Well last night Deb thought I was having a stroke when my one side of my face started to go numb and then my speech started slurring, But I took some meds and started to improve immediately...Still having a tingling sensation in the right side of my head even now.

My health this week will determine if I make the July 17th Stevie Nicks show in Grand Prairie...If I dont feel well I wont push myself to attend. Also I dont know how the affect of travel will affect me either, I do know that loud sounds as of late have worsen my chronic headaches (If I do attend I will be wearing earplugs for health reasons, Not to avoid hearing the same setlist from previous nights )

Adding to my health fun is that I have been bottle feeding 2 kittens whose Mother died after giving birth...They are now a week old and healthy, Couldnt think of any of the typical names I give our pets so I named 'em Missy (Near black calico) & Rufus (A reverse tuxedo-Meaning instead of white on black his fur markings are black on white).

Ain't life fun?

Oh wow, I hope you feel well enough to go see Stevie! Congrats on saving the kittens--that is great! I love cats.

[GateandGarden]

Originally Posted by littlecricket2

Don't worry either if you can't keep up with how ridiculous all of this is, on all sides. Neither can the vast majority of us, so don't even try.

Such true words! I know I can't keep up with all this. I'm losing my mind trying to piece it all together and talk it out with people. I cried over it last night and this morning and I'm so tired of crying about it. (Granted I have other things I'm crying about regularly as well but this is just adding to them). I really want to be friends with everyone and not choose sides at all, but so many have done things to hurt others, intentionally and unintentionally. This has been the biggest headache.

That being said, I hope everything's okay, Brian.

And lagringader&r, (I'm always wondering what you're real name is so I can call you that instead), I am truly sorry, as I said before, that you don't feel welcomed by all at this board. I really didn't think anyone was looking down on you; I hope that's not the case. I certainly don't look down on you and I'm glad you're here.

[estranged4life]

Originally Posted by amber

Sorry, Brian. Did they find out what's wrong with you??? I thought you had an appointment for that. I hope you feel better, someday, and that you make the show. Actually, I know it's a pain, but I'm jealous you have two sweet kittens. Sorry their mom died, though. I love tortoishells (the near black calico).

the closest date to have a MRI performed by a Neurologist is August 3rd...My primary physician ("Doogie Howser") is surprised I was able to get in that early to have one performed. Hopefully the MRI and other tests performed by the Neurologist will help to determine what the hell is goin' on in my head ("The War inside my head..."-Dream Theater). What sucks is now my BP is FUBAR'd due to the stress from the pain I am in a near constant basis. It is all over the place, One moment it will be normal, the next it is sky-frikkin'-high.


Now on to more interesting things...The Mother cat (Which we named Girl) of the 2 kittens was a greeneyed near black calico stub tail, Her tail was not like a manx's, But was more similar to a lynx, Being about 3"-4" long...Her kittens (She lost the first and fourth of the litter) all have normal tails which is kinda of disappointing, But hell they are healthy and we plan to keep 'em.

[DrummerDeanna]

I can't keep up with what's going on either!!

Ok - Brian - that numb face thing is scary - I really hope you can start to get well soon - I worry about your health stuff!!

LaGringa (yes we do need a real name for you lol) - I'm sorry you feel that some look down upon you or would rather slit their wrists than respond to you - I, like Amber, can't even imagine who those people would be but whatev. I think you're relatively new to the board - and in that sense I thought you were doing spledidly getting to know people etc

I guess I just live in happy land most of the time - so threads like this upset me - I just talk - and if people respond, cool - if not - then oh well - there are tons of things going on at once - I know I can't keep up with all of it - who can??

Um lets see...I don't have a problem with anyone on this board - I'm getting tired of people saying there's a clique or a "gang" I mean - some people have just been here a long-ass time, or post a helluva lot - and therefore some know people better than others....I like when new people join in - when they're not being rude, defensive and overall unpleasant - I don't like anyone in any circumstance real or on-line if they're jerks about everything....

[lagringader&r]

You know what? You're going to go to that show! You and Deb are racking up major karma points by bottle feeding two homeless kittens and this is what you really want to do. That part of life is fun. Try to rest and definitely take earplugs for the flight and the show. I'll be thinking about you.

Originally Posted by estranged4life

Well last night Deb thought I was having a stroke when my one side of my face started to go numb and then my speech started slurring, But I took some meds and started to improve immediately...Still having a tingling sensation in the right side of my head even now.

My health this week will determine if I make the July 17th Stevie Nicks show in Grand Prairie...If I dont feel well I wont push myself to attend. Also I dont know how the affect of travel will affect me either, I do know that loud sounds as of late have worsen my chronic headaches (If I do attend I will be wearing earplugs for health reasons, Not to avoid hearing the same setlist from previous nights )

Adding to my health fun is that I have been bottle feeding 2 kittens whose Mother died after giving birth...They are now a week old and healthy, Couldnt think of any of the typical names I give our pets so I named 'em Missy (Near black calico) & Rufus (A reverse tuxedo-Meaning instead of white on black his fur markings are black on white).

Ain't life fun?

[amber]

Originally Posted by estranged4life

the closest date to have a MRI performed by a Neurologist is August 3rd...My primary physician ("Doogie Howser") is surprised I was able to get in that early to have one performed. Hopefully the MRI and other tests performed by the Neurologist will help to determine what the hell is goin' on in my head ("The War inside my head..."-Dream Theater). What sucks is now my BP is FUBAR'd due to the stress from the pain I am in a near constant basis. It is all over the place, One moment it will be normal, the next it is sky-frikkin'-high.


Now on to more interesting things...The Mother cat (Which we named Girl) of the 2 kittens was a greeneyed near black calico stub tail, Her tail was not like a manx's, But was more similar to a lynx, Being about 3"-4" long...Her kittens (She lost the first and fourth of the litter) all have normal tails which is kinda of disappointing, But hell they are healthy and we plan to keep 'em.

Oh, I didn't realize the MRI was so far away. Well, goddamn, hopefully they find something. Just try to breathe deep, for goodness sake, until then. We don't need your blood pressure whacking out, too.
cute cat (girl), so sad she died. Glad you're keeping the kits, though. They are sooo fun, aren't they? They'll cheer you up. with their rascally antics.

[lagringader&r]

Originally Posted by amber

Do you really think that some people would rather slit their wrists than respond to your posts?? I honestly can't imagine that, but then, I'm not everyone, clearly. I don't think that "rolled their eyes, made gagging motions" thing could possibly be true, either. Who would think like that??? And I think even the people who like funny posts would still respond to you, sometimes. But if not, you are probably merely one of, oh, 10,000 or so people that they wouldn't respond to, anyways. And, lots of times, the gay boys like to talk to the other gay boys. No big. You have to admit, there are millions of people on here who do respond to you, that you could and do talk to. And as for others, well, give them a chance, you just got here. Just saying. I don't think anyone purposefully sets out to have a group, but just like all people, different people respond to different things. I'm sure you, yourself, respond to certain things more than others. yeah? Heck, barely anyone here talked to me for like, a month when i started posting. But I didn't talk about a "group", I just kept butting in and saying things when I felt like it, about things they were talking about, or whatever. And still, again, there are people who never talk to me. It really isn't a big deal. And, for the record, I think you are nice, insightful, and interesting.

Thanks. I was more fun when I partied. Everything you posted is probably true. Right now, I don't know which things are real and which I'm imagining. Have you ever felt that way?

[amber]

Originally Posted by lagringader&r

Thanks. I was more fun when I partied. Everything you posted is probably true. Right now, I don't know which things are real and which I'm imagining. Have you ever felt that way?

Yeah. I usually assume that I'm imagining them. Trust me, almost everyone here has at some time felt that their posts were being ignored. It usually passes, some people just get in the swing of a conversation, and pay attention to whoever they are talking to. But, also, when that happens, some people have said something like "hey, what am i, invisible?" or something. That usually does the trick.
I think you are perfectly interesting enough, now. and better yet, healthy!!! Sesly, just give it time. I agree with Deanna, I actually thought you were getting to know people very well.

[lagringader&r]

Originally Posted by littlecricket2

Don't worry, Lux wasn't accusing you of trying to be cool; she knew you weren't and was being sarcastic because people accused her of trying to be cool, or something, and she was trying to make a comparison to expose how ridiculous their argument was.

Don't worry either if you can't keep up with how ridiculous all of this is, on all sides. Neither can the vast majority of us, so don't even try.

I can't speak for Lux, but I think this thread is all about airing it out. I guess that's what everybody is doing. Some of it is good and some isn't. I can't keep up really, but that's not unusual for me.

Hillary and Deanna, thanks. Call me Sue. Much easier.

[littlecricket2]

Originally Posted by GateandGarden

Such true words! I know I can't keep up with all this. I'm losing my mind trying to piece it all together and talk it out with people. I cried over it last night and this morning and I'm so tired of crying about it. (Granted I have other things I'm crying about regularly as well but this is just adding to them). I really want to be friends with everyone and not choose sides at all, but so many have done things to hurt others, intentionally and unintentionally. This has been the biggest headache.

That being said, I hope everything's okay, Brian.

And lagringader&r, (I'm always wondering what you're real name is so I can call you that instead), I am truly sorry, as I said before, that you don't feel welcomed by all at this board. I really didn't think anyone was looking down on you; I hope that's not the case. I certainly don't look down on you and I'm glad you're here.

Hillary, please promise me you will never shed another tear about any argument occuring on a message board ever again. Seriously. I'm willing to bet a sizable chunk of money that the people most entrenched in this argument didn't even cry over it. So. Not. Worth it.

[macfanken]

Originally Posted by lagringader&r

I definitely wasn't trying to be cool. I think this is up there with one of the most uncool things I've ever had to do (the situation with my dad). I spend every spare moment I have when we get back from sitting with him just trying to escape it. Thank gawd for Stevie Nicks is all I can say. I do think there is a *popular* group here. I know there are some posters who would rather slit their wrists then respond to anything I have to say. Why? Probably because I am real (not that anyone else isn't), but I post about who I am and what I've done in my life along with posts about FM videos and my fave songs of Stevie's. I haven't led the cleanest of lives. What I've done doesn't go down well with some people. It isn't *proper* or *cool*. I think when I posted about my dad there might have been a few people here who even rolled their eyes, talked about me behind my back or made the finger-down-the-throat-gag motion. Then, there are the others who were nice and even pmed me to make me feel better. So, it's a mixed group. I do definitely think there is a *group* though. Unless I say the funniest things and have the sharpest and quickest comebacks, I'm pretty much f*cked at fitting into it.

(My tone isn't meant to offend anyone and I'm sorry if it does. I'm just saying how I feel).

I'm sorry to hear about your situation with your father... it must be tough. I didn't see your original post at the time because I usually don't read every post in a thread... especially one that is this long. I honestly don't think anyone here was rolling their eyes at your post and I don't think people are judging you based on your past, I don't think it's even an issue. I think you're new here and it takes time to fit in... I've been here forever and I'm still not in the "popular crowd"... if there is one.

[lagringader&r]

Originally Posted by amber

Yeah. I usually assume that I'm imagining them. Trust me, almost everyone here has at some time felt that their posts were being ignored. It usually passes, some people just get in the swing of a conversation, and pay attention to whoever they are talking to. But, also, when that happens, some people have said something like "hey, what am i, invisible?" or something. That usually does the trick.
I think you are perfectly interesting enough, now. and better yet, healthy!!! Sesly, just give it time. I agree with Deanna, I actually thought you were getting to know people very well.

The really awesome thing about being f*cked up is that you do imagine a lot of sh*t and you don't give a sh*t. Now, I don't know what's imagined and I do give a sh*t. Aww sh*t, I don't give a sh*t. Well, you know what I mean.. Thanks for saying nice things. I'm going to take a walk now.

[DrummerDeanna]

Awesome - Sue is much nicer sounding than "LaGringa" lol....but if you're in Brasil - I'm betting you may speak better Spanish than I?

Anyway - this thread - when you started part I and I PartII was (I also thought) just about airing stuff out - random thoughts - whatever - I don't know what triggered last night's deal with Lux & Co - glad I wasn't here because it's usually hard for me to stay out of that stuff... But yeah - I, for one, appreciate what you've said in this thread - and like Amber said - all of us feel ignored from time to time....

And as someone else said, it's funny because no one seems to think they're in the "popular crowd" lol...so actually IS in it

[lagringader&r]

Originally Posted by littlecricket2

Hillary, please promise me you will never shed another tear about any argument occuring on a message board ever again. Seriously. I'm willing to bet a sizable chunk of money that the people most entrenched in this argument didn't even cry over it. So. Not. Worth it.

I totally agree with this! Hillary, last night after I posted my thing, I cried too. Like you said, there were other things you were crying over, but it's like this was the straw. She's right. It's So. Not. Worth it.

[macfanken]

Originally Posted by amber

Yeah. I usually assume that I'm imagining them. Trust me, almost everyone here has at some time felt that their posts were being ignored. It usually passes, some people just get in the swing of a conversation, and pay attention to whoever they are talking to. But, also, when that happens, some people have said something like "hey, what am i, invisible?" or something. That usually does the trick.
I think you are perfectly interesting enough, now. and better yet, healthy!!! Sesly, just give it time. I agree with Deanna, I actually thought you were getting to know people very well.

Yes... sometimes I think I'm a Thread Killer... I'll post, the thread dies and eventually falls off the index page. I think it's all about timing and like you said, being in the swing of a conversation.