Random Thoughts/Express Yourself

[mylittledemon]

Originally Posted by xdreamsunwindx

Random!
- I really, really don't want to go to work tomorrow.
- I want to dye my hair purple.

Okay, the end.

Dont go to work a dye your hair. You only live once.

[DrummerDeanna]

Go to what I look like to see my hair pictures :P

[lagringader&r]

Originally Posted by SuzeQuze

Why do they cheat?

* Because they can.
* They have a compulsion.
* Sexual addiction.
* Looking for a thrill.
* Unhappily married.
* Wife is frigid.
* Know they can get away with it and have no conscience. (these are the very scary ones)

I don't know. Is any reason really good enough?

I'm not an old-fashioned kind of girl , but that is one thing that really turns me off. Taking the reasons one by one:
Compulsion: How many men actually have a sexual compulsion? Is that common?
Sexual addiction: Isn't that the same thing?
Looking for a thrill: This one I totally buy.
Unhappily married: And this one might be the biggest.
Wife is frigid: Why do women become frigid? (random thought again) Could it be that their husbands have them so beaten down with worry and pressure that they become frigid?
Know they can get away with it and have no conscience: I think some men are so careful about premeditating it and setting it up (the affair). You're right. These are the scariest ones.

I don't know and maybe I'm making it too simple, but why get married at all if you're just going to want to bang someone else? It seems like a like of trouble and expense to go to just to find someone else to f*ck around with.

[amber]

Originally Posted by sparky

I could write a PhD on this one.

I think those are a few reasons. Mainly it isn't the addiction or the compulsion.
I have found a few things in my married buddies personalities that really explain a lot.
Most of them don't want to be married. Period. When you get down to it, they felt they HAD to get married, and HAD to have kids. They got married sooner than they should have, and most of them to the wrong woman. Let's face it, only a fraction of humans take any personal responsibility these days. So, anyone who feels hurt, and feels victimized or "unhappy", feels the permission to go out and get satisfied. Fill in the blank for what the satisfaction entails - food, sex, danger, spending on credit cards, etc.
People want what they want and they want it NOW.
I also think that our modern society fails to realize that marriage is a modern construct. The concept of these crazy over the top "weddings" for everyone only took hold in the Victorian era. Before that the big wedding was the sole domain of the wealthy and marriage was about property transfer and control of power. Families arranged marriages to consolidate wealth and power. The romance thing is new new new. Love is not - but the concept of a romantic, fulfilling, fairy tale marriage definitely is.
For tens of thousands of years, men (and this is about why MEN cheat) have not had to control their sexual drive the way modern society demands. I am not apologizing -this is history. This is history and we are when you get down to it, animals. Biologically and historically, women have had kids and raised them, men have gone out and killed stuff and protected them. Not a whole lot time to worry about sexual fidelity and romantic fulfillment. That is a lot of history that has had to have had an impact, and imprint on the way the mind operates. Modern marriage, in my opinion, runs counter to tens of thousands of years of history and behavior in the male of the species. Do I think marriage and monogomy are wrong ? No. But I think this is one of the main reasons why men cheat. And by and large, probably will always cheat. Everyone forgets that the way we live now is brand new, and a mere sliver in the history of our species. This whole marriage thing is a small branch on an enormous oak tree of social history.

I was going to say, I always wondered why men got married... It just seems like a state of being that is so far from symbiotic with human nature, to me. I'm sure it works for some people, but overall, I don't really think it's the best idea.

[xdreamsunwindx]

Originally Posted by mylittledemon

Dont go to work a dye your hair. You only live once.

Oh, I want to so bad. Thing is, my hair's black right now, and I'm afraid to bleach it. -_-

Funny enough, the purple hair wouldn't be unusual where I work.

[estranged4life]

Originally Posted by lagringader&r

I don't know and maybe I'm making it too simple, but why get married at all if you're just going to want to bang someone else? It seems like a like of trouble and expense to go to just to find someone else to f*ck around with.

Al "Stinky foot" Bundy once said "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"

Brian "The only person in my family to have never been divorced...Plan on keeping it that way " j.

[SuzeQuze]

Originally Posted by xdreamsunwindx

Oh, I want to so bad. Thing is, my hair's black right now, and I'm afraid to bleach it. -_-

Funny enough, the purple hair wouldn't be unusual where I work.

Hmm, if you're only bleaching the tips the worst that could happen is you'd have to cut off the tips. Is that all that bad? Rawk the purple hair!

[SuzeQuze]

Originally Posted by lagringader&r

I'm not an old-fashioned kind of girl , but that is one thing that really turns me off. Taking the reasons one by one:
Compulsion: How many men actually have a sexual compulsion? Is that common?
Sexual addiction: Isn't that the same thing?
Looking for a thrill: This one I totally buy.
Unhappily married: And this one might be the biggest.
Wife is frigid: Why do women become frigid? (random thought again) Could it be that their husbands have them so beaten down with worry and pressure that they become frigid?
Know they can get away with it and have no conscience: I think some men are so careful about premeditating it and setting it up (the affair). You're right. These are the scariest ones.

I don't know and maybe I'm making it too simple, but why get married at all if you're just going to want to bang someone else? It seems like a like of trouble and expense to go to just to find someone else to f*ck around with.

The compulsion/addiction thing is questionable and yes they are nearly identical. I think addiction just indicates a more regular pattern. Some people really are sexually addicted though I think having that clinical diagnosis is fairly rare.

Oh yeah, and women become frigid because they are not satisfied and they don't know how to tell their spose and get what they want need. Just a theory.

[estranged4life]

why is that women are so damn fascinated with my hair? My sis Lesa and her friend Dawn were running their hands through my hair commenting on how soft/shiny/long/etc my hair is (Which is annoying to me, How would women like it if I pulled an Amber and squeezed a boob to determine if it's nice/soft/real???)...Hell, I guess genetics had something to do with it

Geez folkz, Buy a poodle or something if ya want to play with someone's/something's hair

[DrummerDeanna]

Originally Posted by estranged4life

why is that women are so damn fascinated with my hair? My sis Lesa and her friend Dawn were running their hands through my hair commenting on how soft/shiny/long/etc my hair is (Which is annoying to me, How would women like it if I pulled an Amber and squeezed a boob to determine if it's nice/soft/real???)...Hell, I guess genetics had something to do with it

Geez folkz, Buy a poodle or something if ya want to play with someone's/something's hair

Hmm..hair/boob...don't think you've got a strong argument there, Brian. perhaps if people were stroking something other than your long head of hair you'd have a stronger argument.

From my experience boys with long hair just have such soft lovely hair - my ex-boyfriend had long soft hair - I used to love to brush it, run my hands through it etc

Perhaps it's just the curse of the long-haired man.

[estranged4life]

Originally Posted by DrummerDeanna

Hmm..hair/boob...don't think you've got a strong argument there, Brian. perhaps if people were stroking something other than your long head of hair you'd have a stronger argument.

From my experience boys with long hair just have such soft lovely hair - my ex-boyfriend had long soft hair - I used to love to brush it, run my hands through it etc

Perhaps it's just the curse of the long-haired man.

it still is an annoyance, Unless the women are really good lookin', Then I guess I could be play-doh in their arms (Ah, Those damn cold shower inducing thoughts)

[DrummerDeanna]

Originally Posted by estranged4life

it still is an annoyance, Unless the women are really good lookin', Then I guess I could be play-doh in their arms (Ah, Those damn cold shower inducing thoughts)

Well I think shaved-head guys have the same thing- I love rubbing guys' head when they have the shave fuzz

[amber]

Originally Posted by BTFLCHLD

im going through a divorce after 10 years of togetherness...i have friends and family...but i feel so f'in alone mostimes

I'm so sorry. I hope you feel...better....soon.

[The Tower]

Originally Posted by takenbythesky

Thank you, Amber. I don't think I'm particularly pervy...I just like exploring my own body (bordering on too much information, I'm afraid).

Originally Posted by Moony

HOLY FxCK!

Good stuff!!!

Originally Posted by ryan8472

- I have a huge crush on my best friend Rhys. I don't know if he sees that or not, but I just love being around him, he's a lot of fun.

You consistly amaze me.

Originally Posted by sparky

I also think that our modern society fails to realize that marriage is a modern construct. The concept of these crazy over the top "weddings" for everyone only took hold in the Victorian era.

People's ignorance about history is wearisome. All this "defense of marriage" bull**** and the "instituition of marriage" crap is so deceptive. I've shut myself away from it now (like gldstwmn)

Originally Posted by amber

I was going to say, I always wondered why men got married... It just seems like a state of being that is so far from symbiotic with human nature, to me. I'm sure it works for some people, but overall, I don't really think it's the best idea.

All three of my brothers got married and all three of them got divorced and now all three of them have remarried. Whatever. I don't get it.

I've been with my partner for almost 12 years now. It certainly has never been perfect- no relationship is. But, I love him and I really enjoy my time with him despite our differences. Is it a marriage?? Eh. I guess it kind of is until we decide it isn't. Ever since regaining my sanity and discovering real happiness, I pretty much live in the here and now. I hate talking in bumper stickers, but what is one to do?

[amber]

Originally Posted by The Tower

Good stuff!!!


You consistly amaze me.


People's ignorance about history is wearisome. All this "defense of marriage" bull**** and the "instituition of marriage" crap is so deceptive. I've shut myself away from it now (like gldstwmn)


All three of my brothers got married and all three of them got divorced and now all three of them have remarried. Whatever. I don't get it.

I've been with my partner for almost 12 years now. It certainly has never been perfect- no relationship is. But, I love him and I really enjoy my time with him despite our differences. Is it a marriage?? Eh. I guess it kind of is until we decide it isn't. Ever since regaining my sanity and discovering real happiness, I pretty much live in the here and now. I hate talking in bumper stickers, but what is one to do?

Yeah, but you've been together for that long cause you want to be, not cause you "decided to get married and live only with each other in the eyes of god in holy wedded matrimony forsaking all others for eternity"
I dunno, the difference seems clear to me.