Remove Your Debt The Christian Way

[estranged4life]

Originally Posted by seeker007nmss

You have to start your own church, become tax exempt, go on TV and fleece people from their money. Offer FREE tapes of your speeches for only 19.95 postage and handling. Sell the names and addresses of those that call in for Prayer Warriors to pray for them to marketing firms for more cash. They if all else fails, say God told you that if you don't raise $$100 Milion dollars the devil is going to take you. Add in a few crying women with awful makeup- Some bad singers - and there you go! Out of debt! Then go on and market this package as a Christian Teaching Tool to get out of debt!

The First Church of the Chiffonheads!

We can make up ur own belief system of how our Lord Stevie was placed here on Earth to enlighten us, Teach, etc, blahblahblahblahyaddayaddayadda...

Then again on second thought, That wouldnt sell too good to those Lindsey-ites and Penguin-pushers, And of course those Moneybag M$ck's

[GateandGarden]

Originally Posted by Nixxxed

BUT - you could print them out and sell them on Ebay as miracles!

That is great. Thanks for posting.

[Johnny Stew]

Originally Posted by takenbythesky

How does one go about "removing debt the Christian way?"

Does one pray to God, in the hope that God will smite the persons one is indebted to? Somehow, I get the feeling that won't work out...This is so ridiculous it's hilarious.

THAT is hysterical, Justin!

+100!

[jannieC]

I'll just stay broke and in debt, thanks.

[darklinensuit]

I'm picking up my new contacts tomorrow, which is a good thing, considering I thought it said Remove your belt the Christian way.

- Jake

[Nixxxed]

Originally Posted by darklinensuit

I'm picking up my new contacts tomorrow, which is a good thing, considering I thought it said Remove your belt the Christian way.

- Jake

Which is interesting, because if this trend continues, "Christian" porn sites will surely be popping up everywhere soon: clothes on, lights off, missionary position only...

[dudden22]

Originally Posted by Nixxxed

Which is interesting, because if this trend continues, "Christian" porn sites will surely be popping up everywhere soon: clothes on, lights off, missionary position only...

I love your sig! Beautiful picture of her. I am finally watching "Welcome To Sunny Florida" tonight. I wish she had more live dvd's! The New York one was ok, but she can do so much better.

[strandinthewind]

Originally Posted by Nixxxed

Which is interesting, because if this trend continues, "Christian" porn sites will surely be popping up everywhere soon: clothes on, lights off, missionary position only...

and no fingers - hands on the headboard !!!!!!!!!!!

[ryan8472]

Originally Posted by Nixxxed

Is that what's going on? People jumping on the bandwagon and marketing this way? Or is this stuff real? (Yes, I know it's spam - I just can't convince myself which way this tide is flowing...)

What's next? "Christian" carpet cleaning and tooth-whitening ads?

No, but we may see Christian breakfast cereals.

"Jesus Crisps!" - It's a miricale in a box!
or
"Coco Christs" - Tho that may insinuate other things.

[dudden22]

Originally Posted by ryan8472

No, but we may see Christian breakfast cereals.

"Jesus Crisps!" - It's a miricale in a box!
or
"Coco Christs" - Tho that may insinuate other things.

That is hysterical.

[Nixxxed]

Originally Posted by dudden22

I love your sig! Beautiful picture of her. I am finally watching "Welcome To Sunny Florida" tonight. I wish she had more live dvd's! The New York one was ok, but she can do so much better.

I love me some Tori, but I just can't watch that DVD. Too many closeups, no atmosphere, and HER HAIR - I spend the whole 2 hours thinking about sending her hot oil treatments. It sounds great, and is an amazing performance, tho -- I usually just listen to it (with the TV off). But I LOVE the "Scarlet's Hidden Treasures" disc!

"Bug a martini -- send me to Moscow!"

[Nixxxed]

Originally Posted by ryan8472

No, but we may see Christian breakfast cereals.

"Jesus Crisps!" - It's a miricale in a box!
or
"Coco Christs" - Tho that may insinuate other things.

Well, there's already this (even though it's a few years old now):

"What Would Jesus Eat?"

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg...83860?v=glance

(BTW - some of the reader comments are hysterical...)

[dissention]

Originally Posted by Nixxxed

Well, there's already this (even though it's a few years old now):

"What Would Jesus Eat?"

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg...83860?v=glance

(BTW - some of the reader comments are hysterical...)

Ho****.

"Loves and fishes for me...washed down with a drop of wine vinegar...lovely!"

"Jesus was a glutton and a drunkard. Remember, Jesus really didn't eat well when He did eat. And he went without food for long periods of time. This is a cash-in attempt to sell a mediocre diet.

See Matthew 11:19
The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, "Look, a glutton and a winebibber, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!' But wisdom is justified by her children."

[estranged4life]

[dudden22]

Originally Posted by Nixxxed

I love me some Tori, but I just can't watch that DVD. Too many closeups, no atmosphere, and HER HAIR - I spend the whole 2 hours thinking about sending her hot oil treatments. It sounds great, and is an amazing performance, tho -- I usually just listen to it (with the TV off). But I LOVE the "Scarlet's Hidden Treasures" disc!

"Bug a martini -- send me to Moscow!"

I just watched it last night. What was she thinking with the hair. Why did they have to censor "Professional Widow"? It is not like parents would let their kids watch her anyway. "Oh look honey, Tori Amos, isn't she that nice girl that sings about Father Lucifer, smashing the faces of christian boys, and Jesus being a woman."