1. I love a good Ledge orgy.
2. The greatest composer in the Western tradition is Sheb Wooley. Millions of people wrote symphonies or love songs, but who else paid musical tribute to the life and times of a Purple People Eater?.
3. I was filming "Two Boys, One Bowl" with Peter O'Toole when Louise de Vilmorin died.
4. Generally, ledgies are colorful, scalable, decent, & the children of Nicks and Coca-Cola.
5. One of the drawbacks of premarital sex is not yet having your lives legally intertwined in a 50/50 split of everything. Popping your cherry is fun, but popping our cherry gives a certain sense of unity that will last forever, or until you discover that while you were saving yourself, I was getting freaky with your sister, mother, priest, and hamster. Sorry.
6. Stevie's best body part, aesthetically speaking, is her enchanted uterus, currently home to a pack of gypsies, and formerly a stop on the underground railroad.
7. Lindsey's best body part, ontologically speaking, is his metaphysical "Udall '76" scrotum tattoo.
8. The bathroom is no place for defecating.
9. The kitchen is certainly no place for eating.
10. Fellow ledgie Michelle seems to have a pretty solid handle on Buzz Aldrin's mating habits.
11. Fellow ledgie PeteP9000 seems to prefer a love-filled Stevie to a rat-infested Stevie.
12. Fellow ledgie Paula might have made a really great squid if only she hadn't been two squids.
13. My inability to consider you folks anything but a figment of my imagination mars my interaction with other ledgies.
14. I wish fellow ledgie vivfox had a picture of Stevie using her cheeks to wipe between her other cheeks.
15. I'd sell my most prized article of FM memorabilia in order to watch all 23 episodes of 1978's animated "Fleetwood Mac Mysteries," starring the fab five and their lovable, yet homicidal, penguin Rusty solving crimes in the San Fernando Valley as hilarity ensues at the next ledgie convention.
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