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Originally Posted by skcin
BUT. Looking back, I realize that he liked being in control. Maybe that's not the best term to use, because I've always been a very strong person, he didn't "control" me really. Yet I remember things he would say when we'd argue, and the way he'd say them - he sometimes acted as if he were an authority figure to me. He liked to think of himself as teaching me things about love & life...ew, I feel nauseous, it's so icky to me now. Like, I told him to f*ck off once, and he basically lectured me & told me "don't ever speak to me that way again!" I almost expected him to add "young lady."  |
my god. I almost teared up reading this because it reminds me of my best friend so much. except, she's not 19, she's 24. She's married and her husband is quite a bit older than her. He treats her like this all the time and says how she is "disrespectful towards him" and "would you talk to your dad like that' and all this ****. she told him "F you" one time and he flipped. of course he can say it anytime he wants. idk....I hate it because she was NEVER like that. ever. I know this was off topic, but I just needed to say that because it was so close to home
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So I guess the point of my telling my personal story that nobody cares about, is to be open with her & honest about why you think this is a bad idea. I wouldn't forbid her, but I wouldn't enable either (don't let me stay at your house hours on end, day after day, don't drive her to see him, etc.) And hope & pray she's strong enough on her own to not "need" a man - whether it be this guy or another.
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and I agree with this too. she thinks she's in love, so nothing is going to stop her until she sees it for herself. hopefully you guys can come out of this still close, unpregnant, and kicking his ass to the curb. it just might take her awhile to see it. so in the meantime, you have to ride that fence of trying to be a strong person for her to lean on if that's what she needs and also the parental figure that is going to try to lay some type of rules. I hate this for you, but hopefully in the end, everything will work out. best of luck to you guys
