Brokeback Mountain
Tipping the Velvet
Fingersmith**
The Birdcage
Boys Don’t Cry
Hedwig and the Angry Inch
The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls in Love
The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Those are the ones I've seen except for Fingersmith, which own but haven't watched yet as I am waiting until I read the book.
**Hedwig - I absolutely ADORE that movie..it's beautiful.
**ITAOTGIL - Good but not great, it was the first lesbian themed movie I ever say, so I was obsessed with it at 17, now at 27 it's very amatureish and ok - not stellar...but I still find it cure...
**Birdcage - still cracks my ass up everytime I see it...
Steel Magnolias is my all-time favorite movie, but aside from the one scene (all gay men have track-ligthin') there are no gay themes in it at all, the top 50 movies on this list are all gay-themed

But hell Steel Magnolias is at the top of all my lists - as is 9 to 5...but again, that one I see no gay themes in
Maybe I missed what you were trying to say....