Homie, I really feel for you! I have also lost a couple of pets I've been really close to. It takes a long long time to cope with it.
They say "time heals all wounds' but I think some wounds never completely heal, it just make them a little less painful. Give it time, and don't be afraid of "losing it", it's all part of the grieving process.
Not sure if you've ever seen this poem, but it helped me a lot when I lost my dog/friend Zeus.
http://rainbowsbridge.com/Poem.htm