I have one girlfriend that I feel really happy that I know her. I have known her for 15 years and she 's about the only person that can make me laugh when I am sad..Other than that, the rest of my friends are ok, but she is the only one I feel like telling her everything. And my fiance/boyfriend is someone I could consider as my my best freind too.
On another note, I felt like sharing something here (I 'm posting it on this thread, even though it's not totally relevant). Has any of you ever felt drawn to a person with whom you have no particular relationship (I mean neither friendship nor a "love affair") but you feel like you can tell them everything and trust them and feel happy around them? I am asking because for the last couple of years I have been going through a very strange situation. There is a teacher from my University, with whom I used to talk about my professional agonies but after a while, it got a bit more personal. We never really became friends (I send him e-mails on birthdays, X-mas etc, but we don't call each other and we don't go out for dinner or anything). I meet him once in a while (which means once every one-two months or even less frequently), he's always happy to see me, once we spent two whole hours talking on the phone, he asks me about everything and we talk about everything. My relationship, his relationship with his wife etc. I have to make clear that he 's the total opposite of "cheap". He has never ever implied that he was interested in me romantically (or otherwise
) but my friends find it very hard to believe . They say that it has definitely crossed his mind, that it is something that it definitely crosses a 45 year old man's mind when he 's around a young woman who shows so much interest and affection to him.However, I definitely don't get any such vibe from him and I know he is very serious and respected and the way he sees me is sort or "paternal", (or a "mentor" sort of thing) even though our age difference is not that big . But that's not even the problem.
I am so happy when I 'm with him, I trust, respect and admire him (and in Hal Hartley's world this would mean that I love him
) . I wish that I could tell him all that one day, how he is so special to me (although I think he knows part of it) but I 'm afraid that I might be misunderstood. I don't want him to think I 'm in love with him, it would definitely ruin it and it would not even be my point. I don't know what it is. I have so much affection for him and I feel that I can't show it, out of fear that he thinks I 'm up to something else.
He makes me
happy, and when I 'm with him, I am totally aware of who I am and what I want (if that makes sense) and the fact that I can't be as close to him as I sometimes feel the need to, makes me sad and confused.
Has any of you ever experienced something similar? Can you love someone you are not really related to in any -conventional- way? Or is it just that I 'm in love with him?
I am so sorry for the long post, I really needed to talk about it