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New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for Classmates.com! There's a reason you don't talk to people for 25 years. Because you don't particularly like them! Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days: mowing my lawn.
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I remember seeing this one particular ass-jock punk from my highschool years working at a Homeland store and when I noticed a spill in the soda section I made sure to let him know that "You need to clean that up before someone falls and sues your ass".
Hell I am surprised he even had a job since he sure as hell couldnt spell J-O-B!!!
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New Rule: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. At least
they're getting some kind of sex education.
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If my 8th grade English teacher Ms.Smith wanted to have sex with me I sure as hell wouldnt have yelled/whined "I was abused"....Well unless she was into the kinky thing, But then again that wouldve been fine with me cause she was hella hot (The reason I sat directly in front of her in class...Hey ya snooze & ya lose, So I got the best seat in class to check her out on a daily basis!) besides-"Sticks and stones may break my bones...but whips & chains excite me!"
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New Rule: Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn't make you spiritual. It's right above the crack of your ass. And it translates to "beef with broccoli." The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren't pregnant. You're not spiritual. You're just high.
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I think most of those tattoos say in Chinese "I have a small penis and dont score much except with sheep", "My nickname is Butter cause i am easy to spread" or "Mary Jane Rotten-Crotch gave me the clap".