This is a South Park News break: "Tom Cruise will NOT come out of the closet."
I enjoyed it. Especially the section in the middle where they were explaining the Thetans, with "THIS IS WHAT SCIENTOLOGISTS ACTUALLY BELIEVE" splashed across the screen. Even though it wasn't funny at all - pretty creepy, actually.
I also just caught last week's Ginger Kid episode on a replay the other day. Oh, man.