There's a reason why I rarely shake hands (and rush to a bottle of Purell when I do).
I pity the fools who eat the pretzels and nuts at bars, too. If they only knew what they were ingesting. Poor schlubs. The real nasty little porkers are the ones who use public restrooms and don't wash their hands. I've been at movie theaters and, when I'm forced to use the john, there's always some random cootie-carrying schmuck who shakes his dick around like it's goddamned sparkler on the 4th of July and then waltzes out while rubbing his hands on his Levis that are two sizes too small for his overweight ass. Makes me think twice about buying popcorn, I could very well be eating some employees dried piss spores.