Quote:
Originally posted by gldstwmn
First of all you don't make a habit out of it. It makes a habit out of you. It all starts off very insidiously. Dont' fool yourself with being able to function "normally and healthy". There are plenty of functioning alcoholics and addicts. Please don't think I'm attacking you, I'm not. You're either clean or you're not.
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Then my drug addiction has been "Starting insiduously" for the last 9 years!
Actually every time I've gotten on the path to serious drug addiction I've held my horses and taken a break. When me and all my friends were big into coke 6 years ago, I was smart enough to quit before I OD'ed like my friend did. I saw it coming and got scared. My b-day was the 2nd or 3rd occasion since 6 years ago. She's alive and kickin' and drug free now, BTW.
Then I was big into ecstacy for a couple years. That was something that started as an occasional thing that gradually built up to once a month, to every few weeks, to every weekend and sometimes twice a week. I spent a fortune on that junk. I was also doing a LOT of crystal meth at the time (and K too) and actually spent a little time in jail on a drug charge. During the time I was in court was the worst. When I was found not guilty of the charges it lessened a little bit.
Then I got my own place. LOL That turned into a mess. During that time I was the worst ever. I did a LOT of K and still took E regularly as well. For the first time ever I was f**ked up on something for 4 months straight. It didn't hit me how bad it was until I was sitting at home, all alone, snorting K by myself. There was no party.
That was over 2 years ago and I'm still in debt to a certain creditor because of it. I moved back home and cleaned up my act and drug use has been sporadic if ever. I've even quit smoking cigarettes as of late. The last 2 years I've exercised at least 4-5 days out of the week. I always wondered if it would get as bad as it did before, but since me and every single one of my friends has grown up a lot, we realize that it's just not a realistic or acceptable way to live your life. But we do, from time to time like to "Reminice" if you will. LOL
After all these experiences with it I absolutely do not ever want to be back there again. I'm very happy where I am now. When the supply I buy is out, I stop there, go to bed and forget about it until the next very distant special occasion.
The minute I'm famous though I'm afraid it's all over.