I Don't Know If I Can Go ON; Support Please !!!!!!
 

This was my post from the first of December where I was explaining about my dad and his health problems. I'm sorry to say that things have gotten worse since that message. The doctors told my dad that he needed a heart transplant about a month ago. While waiting on the heart, my dad's condition was continuing to get worse. His heart function was extremely poor, which was putting a strain on his respiratory system. In the mist of this, we were thrilled with some great news. He was pushed to the top of the transplant list, and a donor was found. The doctors, nurses, my dad, and my family/I were very optimistic about the surgery. They were sure he was a great candidate, and that the heart was perfect for him and in perfect health/working order. They prepared my dad with anti-rejection drugs, and he was off to surgery. His respiratory pressure was higher than they wanted it to be going into surgery, but the doctors had selected a heart from an individual larger than my father. They believed that this would work against the higher respiratory pressure, and that the respiratory issue wouldn't be a problem.

My family and I sat for ten hours without any word from surgery. When they did call the nurse said that they were diligently working on my father. We were worry with that report. After 12 1/2 hours, the doctors and a nurse from surgery came to talk with us. The right side of my father's new heart wouldn't pump. The left side was pumping fine, but the right side was having a hard time pumping against the high respiratory pressure. This is an extremely rare complication. They put in a special device to kick start the right side of his heart. They said sometimes with this device the patient's right side begins to work, and they make a full recovery. My dad's kidneys began to fail after such a long surgery, so they put him on dialysis to rest his body, so the device in his heart would work. But the next night, his lungs began to fail because the right side of his heart never worked correctly even with the device. He didn't not want life support, and he couldn't fight any longer. My dad died on February 3.

Please keep me and my family in your thoughts and prayers. Right now, I'm not sure how I can go on. I've lost the best dad and person in the world. The highest high to the lowest low in my life have been felt in the past two weeks. My God, give me strength.:distress:

{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}

oh gosh. I'm so sorry to hear this. I can't imagine how stressful a time this is and how you must be feeling.

I am thinking of you and wishing you and your family all the love and support I can.

I am so sorry for your loss. My prayers are with you and your family.

That is just awful. You are definately in my thoughts and prayers.

Matt

Dont worry...
 

you're in my thoughts since I can relate (Especially from "the highest of highs to the lowest of lows" in a matter of time). Just hang in there ok? I send your family my condolences...

Brian j.

I am so sorry for your loss. I will light and candle for your father and send loving, supporting energy to you and your family at this time dear.:angel: (((Hugs))).

this just breaks my heart & od course you & your loved ones wil be in my prayers!!!~
may your dad R.I.P.:angel: ~

Stay strong for your family and may your dad rest in peace.

I'm so sorry for your loss. Hang in there, we are here for you. :angel:

I'm so sorry sweetie. :(

I'm so sorry. Please look to us for support to get you through this painful time.

That's such a heartbreaking story. I'm so sorry you and your family had to go through that. I hope that with time everything will feel less painful for you.

I'm so sorry about your dad. You can go on, your dad isn't here, but he still loves you.
Please take care of yourself.

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. You and your family will be in my prayers. *hugs*

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know it's tough. Sending good thoughts to you and your family.

I'm sorry about your loss. I hope your father rests in peace. And may the Lord give you the strength you need so that your father's memories thrive in your heart. Time will make them happy memories once again.

Your pain is your own, but many of us have known pain just like it. Don't ever be ashamed to talk about it when you need to talk about it.

My condolences to you and your family during this difficult time.

You know I'm here for you if u wanna ever talk.:)

i'm so sorry to hear this. :distress: i'll keep you and your family in my thoughts.

The fluffs are with you.

http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a88...fourCuties.jpg

Im so sorry - what a horrible thing to have to go through. I will think of you :xoxo:

I just want to thank each and every one of you that posted a message for me. I really appreciate it. I know that if I don't have a lot of support that I'll never make it through this. Your support means the world to me.

Besides helping myself, I'm trying to help my mother right now. She came to my house to stay for a little while with my husband and me, and she is really struggling with this. It hurts even more to watch her suffer. I just feel so empty like someone has ripped my insides out. I'm numb, and I'm just going through the motions right now. That is the best way I can describe it. I hope that these feelings above will lessen with time. Thank you for the thoughts and prayers. :xoxo:

I am so sorry for your loss. You will remain in my thoughts.

Oh so very sorry for you and your mom.... Grieving is hard work. But do it, feel everything, and it will get better.

It's the hardest thing imaginable, having to do without such a pivotal persn in your life.

Gentle hug.

i'm so sorry to hear about this :( My condolonces for your loss.
I wish you all the strength and love to come trough this!!
You will be in my thoughts aswell

I really don't know what to say, other than I am very sorry to hear this. Not trying to state the obvious, but it's always hard losing a loved one.. there's no way to describe how much it hurts.

You're in my thoughts. Take care. xoxo

I'm so sorry to hear this. Hang in there and know that you'll always have a place on The Ledge. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

I haven't been online for some days now and I just saw it, so I just wanted to say that I am sorry for your loss and that I wish you all the best...
Take care

I'm sorry I missed this thread. I know it's only been a few weeks, but are you and your family doing a little better? I certainly hope so.

Are the dogwoods blooming yet? All that beautiful color used to really cheer me up come springtime. :xoxo:

:distress: Not yet, I'm hoping that when more times passes that we will begin to feel a little better. It is just the hardest thing I have ever dealt with. I'm really still depressed, still crying, and still empty feeling, unfortunately.

The dogwoods aren't blooming yet. I agree that they are extremely beautiful. I'm hoping that springtime will brighten my family's life a little also.

Thanks for the thought.

Hang in there. :xoxo:

I don't know what I was thinking. It's only the beginning of March. Living in a place with only 2 seasons (Hot/Not Hot), it's hard to remember when Spring is really supposed to begin. It was 80 degrees here over the weekend, and the sunflowers I planted in early February are already a foot tall.

I have wonderful memories of driving trips to see the Dogwoods - oh, and the Azalea Trails the Knoxville garden club always used to sponsor. But that was usually in May if I remember.