Depression
 

Anyone dealing with it right now? Because… I am! (she says enthusiastically :rolleyes: )

Just curious. It’s been hitting me hard lately; there’s something about October and November that just ****s me right up. Everything affects me more than usual, even the stupidest and most insignificant of things. I get easily jealous, and that’s the worst part. I'm a terrible person. Blahblahblah. I’m not even sure why I’m telling everyone this. Mostly to get it off my chest, I guess.

:sorry: So, am I as alone as I think I am?

fall...
 

eclipse, I think you gave some really good tips, and in a sensitive thoughtful manner :angel:

goldustsongbird, I hope things pick up for you (if fall gets you down, what does winter do?) and no, you are not alone. I think eclipse had some really great ideas about the candles and music, I would add possibly some incense or fragrance diffuser of some sort. I dont know about you but certain smells are always a pick me up for me. Maybe you could try embracing the season? decorate your home, buy new tablecloth or a wreath for your door? I like collecting the pretty leaves at this time of year and using them in my decorating. Bake some cookies or pies (then the house REALLY smells good!)
maybe you could get a pet (if you dont already have one)?

Im not sure if I helped or not, but I meant well....Good Luck :angel:

I dont meant to offend anyone but juding by the descriptions provided I don't think clinical depression is feeling down because of lousy weather or just gerneral feeling lousy. it still could be what your suffering from cause I don't know the extent I only know the things written here. I've had periods of serious depression where life has completely fallen apart and I've chosen suicide and ended up in hospital care. if I'm wrong and the depression is quite serious I dont think things like candles and happy music and fragrances are what you need.you need to tell a doctor how bad things are and recieve the attention you need. but if you're just feeling down then those things other said might help I don't really know .but in that case the word depression is not the right one. I don't want to offend but I see it misused all the time.

I have been through both types of this depression - the seasonal and the totally off the wall mental, and if you are totally off the wall mentally depressed, then yes, please go to a doctor. There isn't much you can do for yourself. I hated the antidepressants, they made me lazy and tired, but they did help my mental state. If you're going through a seasonal depression (weather really does change moods) then I think eclipse was right on the money. Try to embrace it. Get bundled up and go for a walk and try to enjoy the colors! Do something kind for someone. Write a letter to, whoever, and get your feelings off your chest. I usually go through a seasonal depression in fall, and as a result of it, I took today off work, so I can sit and do something for me today. I'm not sure what that's going to be yet. I hope you come through this. It's no fun being depressed.

I want to clarify that based on goldustsongbird's original post, I didnt get the impression she was talking about true clinical depression but rather something along the lines of "seasonal affective disorder" which IS about the changing of the seasons. apparently the theory is that there is some quality of the sun that is lacking at certain times of the year (ya think?) and people who suffer from SAD need "light therapy" to simulate the benefits of sunlight. Maybe goldustsongbird is extremely sensitive to sunlight (or lack thereof)??

anyway, I just want to state that I was NOT making light of actual clinical depression, but rather taking her original post at face value.

no thats fine. she did seem to be talking about what you described. she just used the word depression which refers to clincal depression and so I was directing the query about which one it was to her.

Understood. and its a valid point.

Lisa,

Please check in and let us know how you are doing. I read your post as a little more serious than the seasonal blahs and I am worried.

I get my seasonal blues in the summer for some reason. Something about feeling like I have to be outside and cheery all the time, when most of my hobbies are indoor activities. I'm usually in much better spirits in the fall and winter because I can go to my movies or museums and not feel guilty like I should be at a beach or something.

I've also had clinical depression, and that is much different.

Anyway, tell us a little more about what's going on. :nod:

Lisa--

I have been there, my friend. Depression is a terrible animal. And while lighting candles, listening to happy music, more light etc may work for some, if you're truly depressed who the hell takes the effort to do those things?? :laugh:

If you can do those things and they help then by all means do them.

The jealous thing...I get that too - and I get really bad anger problems - that on top of depression.

Does this happen every year? How do you get through it other years?

A talk with your doctor may not be a bad idea...

Please continue to talk to us - and vent as needed.

Bitch, please. You know you're going to sit here on The Ledge all damn day with us. :D As usual, I attempt humor to lighten up a heavy situation.

It sounds similar to SAD - Seasonal Affective Disorder. It may seem a bit early in the year, but if your weather's been anything like ours (crappy with little to no sun for at least the last 6 weeks) then it could be happening. I don't mean to try & diagnose you, but it's a thought. Here's a link for more info:

http://www.seasonalaffectivedisorder.com/sad1.html

I think Eclipse & Irish gave some great advice as long as your symptoms are mild. But please, if you literally can't get out of bed, or you're not eating, or if you want to hurt yourself or others (I don't think felling like you want to hurt a Ledgie really counts, though :D ) call your doctor ASAP. :angel:

:xoxo:

of course you're not alone, hon. you know what i've been through, and several others here have shared their experiences. it'll get better as long as you take care of yourself. unfortunately, that can be hard to do when you feel like ****, right? i agree with ryan in that what you described does sound more severe than seasonal stuff - have you told your doc? email me plz! sorry i couldn't talk last night ... i didn't get home from work until almost midnight and was pretty much comatose :rolleyes:. hopefully we can talk tonight. :xoxo:

On the subject of clinical depression, Dooce just posted a link to an excellent column by a writer on the Times-Picayune staff about battling with the disease. I thought it was a great piece and wanted to share it.

I have problems with the seasonal blah blah. Can't help it. Currently trying to figure out that the best way to deal with it isn't to get stoned and eat Italian beef sandwiches every night for dinner just to try and make the night end.

has anyone here tried light therapy? y'know, with the light boxes that are supposed to simulate sunlight? just wondering if anyone has had success with one of those.

I beg your pardon, hooker, but I have written half a paragraph on my paper and am in the middle of cleaning the upstairs bathrooms. I won't be on here ALL damn day....

I haven't but was going to. The boxes start at $200. The aerobic exercise you are already doing is the best defense. It doesn't work for moderate to severe though where meds might be necessary.

My rule of thumb is if you think you "might be" depressed go see your doctor. But I totally get that people don't and when I was I didn't. Until I got the book Feeling Good and took their test that rates your depression. What I thought was mild depression was severe. I'd just had it for so long I'd forgotten what normal was like, my baseline was way off.

Honestly, if it's that bad for me, I go to the tanning bed!

If you say so. I'll be watching you.... :p

Front and center right here. I have beenj battling it for most of my adult life, only last year finally starting to take meds for it. It's a terrible thing. OPNe of my personal side affects is that I eat when I get depressed, and it certainly hasnt helped my waistline. Also, I made terribly foolish decisions with regards to money. WHat would happen is that I'd have mood swings, and when I was really up I'd go out and spend money like it was nothing. For these decisions I have wound up approximately $17,000 in the hole. Please get help if any of the things I mentioned apply to you.

^^
Retail therapy? I'm totally guilty of that too. And it is a terrible affliction - but I don't do it when I'm up - usually if I'm down I go shopping - spend money (that I sometimes don't have) and then I feel slightly better - you know until I have to pay my bills...:o

The only bright side to that for me is that quite a bit of the money I've used over the last 4 years to partake in the Fleetwood Mac/Stevie/Lindsey tours. Yes, foolish practically, but the way I look at it is that at least I have a momrey of what I spent.:nod:

It's all about the momrey's. :laugh:

I'm not that afflicted by the lure of retail. I must be too cheap for it. I do have my up and down days though, that's for sure.

That is good - at least you have good memories etc.

Unfortunately I had a pretty good handle on my credit card - until I moved across the country and had a month where I got no paycheck...

Blah. But with Suze Orman's help and my pay raise - I am heading back in the right direction!

Weird, I am at my happiest this time of year considering how many family deaths I had to endure during Oct.-Nov. of years past (ie-Losing both my Father & Grandfather in a 3 week stretch).

When the weather gets cold, grey & dreary I am super-chipper, but when the weather is warm, sunny w/blue skies I am depressed (Plus, being allergic to sunlight doesnt help matters-I am limited to only about 2.5 hours of direct sunlight a day before I become ill) so maybe my mind is wired different.

I was that way once...
 

but when Deb ended up in the hospital from Dec.2003-March 2004 I quit worrying about the bills & worried about more important things.

Holy sh*t dude. :shocked: $17,000? Your symptoms sounds like more than depression to me. Glad you've gotten help since then, hope you're doing better.

No. I am going through the same thing right now. In fact once I finish my lunch, I'm going to go lay down, take a nap and then go out and participate in some retail therapy. I do take meds for depression but sometimes life and my workload test the limits of that. As my late mother used to say, this too shall pass.

Amen sister. I turned the ringer off on my phone about 20 minutes ago. That's all for today. If it can't wait 'til later or tomorrow, then oh well.

Hey guys. Actually - you're all right. I am clinically depressed, and have told my therapist about it. We've discussed medication a few times, but at the moment, I'm hesitant. Don't get me wrong, I've considered it, but I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with some of the side effects... Especially not the possibility of weight gain. I'm trying to *lose* weight! That sounds a little vain, I guess, but a lot of it also has to do with the history of my family. I'm a little leery depending on any kind of drug. :shrug: }

SAD isn't something I've been diagnosed with, but I've probably got it. In any case, this weather doesn't help matters.


I know, it just seems like other people seem to get over whatever they're going through quickly, no matter how hard, and I'm the one left behind to struggle. :shrug:

Eclipse - I usually get dressed and made-up, even if I'm not going anywhere, but sometimes that depresses me even more. It's the whole 'all dressed up and no place to go' thing. Everyone else has something to do with someone somewhere... and I'm here online, or watching TV, or just... doin' nothing.

Irish - I have a pet. :thumbsup: My budgie, Nelly is usually good company. And you can bet she keeps me company. She's a demanding little bitch. :lol:

Deanna - the jealousy thing is ridiculous! It happens over the smallest things; things I know I probably shouldn't get mad over, but I can't help it. Especially now. I hate feeling left out of things. Because it has to do with my actual depression, it occurs whenever, it's just that the change in seasons heightens and magnifies everything. Funny, it doesn't seem to magnify the good. :o

Oddly (and luckily), I've never experienced that... Right now, the last thing I want to do is go out and shop, even aimlessly. There are times when I don't mind going out for lunch, or going out to browse around the mall or whatever, but mostly, I just want to do what I have to do and go home. Of course, isolation rarely helps the matter. :(

I'm glad you're doing something about it, tho. Do you mind if I ask what you're taking for it?

Yeah... I keep telling myself that. It's hard to believe sometimes, though, y'know?

I know what you mean about the jealousy thing - it was bad my last year of college, and I didn't even know then that it was part of my depression. People really close to me took the brunt -and I didn't get medicated until months later.

I can understand your apprehension on the meds - I felt the same way. But they don't have to be permanent, and there are some better options on the market now that don't have such horrid side-effects.

The weight thing - how effective is losing weight when you're depressed though? I'm just saying because when I was depressed the last thing I wanted to do was eat right or exercise - I didn't start doing that until I got medicated...

Now the meds...I had HORRIBLE symptoms while going off - but that's not typical and I did go off the meds and have been fine for over a year now....but it's still something I have to keep an eye on and work on.

I feel badly for my family sometimes. :distress: Things aren't as bad as they were, but I get terrible moodswings when things get really rough, and that can't be easy for them to deal with.

Well, I've been trying to eat right just for the sake of it, but as far as exercise goes, I haven't done much since the summer. I walk every day or so. That's something, I suppose.

That is something...and something is always better than nothing. Does your family know of your depression? If so then hopefully they understand (mine did...up to a point lol). Other people though - didn't understand, and I heard a lot of.."well just cheer up already!!!" OH! Ok..thanks, I'm CURED!

Yep, they do! My mom is the most understanding of it... I think my dad's still trying to make sense of it. We really don't get along all the time, and before, when I told him I might be depressed and need to see someone, he was like, WTF? I think he thought I was making excuses for being such a horrid bitch. :shrug: He's taking things a little more seriously - and some of my comments said in the heat of the moment a little lighter than he ever would have before.

One of my friends said that to me when I vented one day. I thought she'd be supportive, because she usually is, and knows what it's like, but she ended up growling something along the lines of "The world is absolute ****, just deal with it"

Yeah, ok, suck it, E. :rolleyes:

yeah. i think that feeling is heightened when you're younger and dealing with depression. it's harder to gain perspective on the situation when you've spent most of your adolescent/adult life dealing with it.

i hope you consider medication. i understand your wariness. it's not a cure-all, but it can help lift some of the burden and make it easier to organize your thoughts and work on some of the unhealthy cognitive patterns behind the emotions.

I suffer from occasional depression - mostly due to the ****ed up situation with my mother...

You're not alone Lisa :)

Eh, who knows. Whatev. I don't know... I've been thinking about it a lot more than usual. I just feel a little lost right now. All I want to do is sleep. And you know about my weird sleeping patterns! If I'm awake, I get restless, and I end up spending hours on here, and then I'm pissed when I realize the whole day has passed by...

http://xs108.xs.to/xs108/06436/hug.gif Want to talk about it?

^^

Wanting to sleep all the time...man I remember that feeling too...:distress: I'm really sorry - I hope you get to feeling better soon - and if it comes down to it, meds really aren't that bad - they get a bad rap, but when you feel like absolute sh*t mentally - they can truly be a life saver.

Ehh, I have had enough talking about it. My mother is pretending nothing is going on so Im playing the same game :shrug:

Yeah, Im known for keeping things bottled up