Things you can't believe someone said out loud to you
 

Today I heard, while riding my bike to work. At a good clip.

"Whoa, look at the booty on that bike! You got a big ol' booty! I wish my face was that bike!"

Yeah. All that in the four or so seconds it took me to ride by. Isn't that lovely? P.S., I only wear a 10, and without extra weight I'm still just an 8. So, how can you tell a booty on a bike anyways?
Who's parents teach them this is cool? It's all very mysterious. It's also not an isolated incident.

I don't wear one. Maybe if I did, it would help offset my apparently large and noticeable "booty". :laugh:

i for one can definitely "tell" a booty on a bike...
love it when the boy cyclists race by :]

And I love your sig.

isnt she hot...wish she was on the tele more...
or we had some more US dates [pout]

thanks!

I was going out with an Asian guy last summer and showed a woman I work with who also happened to be Asian his picture she looked at the picture and quipped "He's cute but I bet he's got a small dick"!:lol:

:shocked: :lol:
Oh, man.:distress:

I am very fair skinned and a friend once said, admist a pool-party of about 30 people..."damn Ponyboy look how white your skin is! Your d*#k must be pink!"

I knew eventually this site would get into pornography..:lol:

:laugh:
that qualifies. At least the person wasn't a random stranger, though.

i had a similar situation happen at a club...i was with my friend who has a very nice chestal area ;) and some guy yelled, "oooh, look who brought the titties!!!!"

at least that person was probably drunk, i don't know what excuse your guy has!! :confused:

Well no one said this to me, but I couldn't believe that my child said this out loud to someone! When she was about.....1 1/2 we were swimming at the YMCA. THere was a rather large, ok completely obese woman in the pool, also. We swam by her and Olivia's eyes got big, she pointed her finger at her (we were RIGHT next to the woman) and said "huuuge" :eek: I was mortified. Just a couple of months ago we walked by a woman who was aslo very large and Olivia said (an pointed) "looks she's got a baby in her tummy" Once again :eek: .

I was doing some community theatre and the wife of the owner of my company told me that she would come and see me act when I was in a real play.

yikes! I would have urinated all over that woman's shoes.

When I was eleven or so, a black kid in Cincinnati called me "pink boy."

I'm not sure which mental image I prefer, the one where the woman simply stands there in disbelief while you piss all over her new pair of heels, or the one where you have to chase her around the theater with your dick out.

I guess his excuse is that he likes big butts and he cannot lie. And I'm sure his otherbrothers wouldn't deny...:shrug:

You gut buns, hun. ;) :lol:

:lol: :lol:
aren't kids cute? :shocked:
Apparently when I was two, I told my dad's landlord that he smelled alcoholic, with a sneer, and when I was three I told one of my mom's friends the same thing. (he was diabetic, something about keytones and bad breath, I dunno).
Also, when I was two, I relayed to my grandma that "my mom says it's okay to smoke pot when I grow up, but not cigarrettes" :eek: Which she probably didn't say, at all.
Anyhoo, that's funny, except of course, big people have hard enough lives already, so that's bad. :distress: At least you were mortified...:laugh:

:lol:
yarp. Maybe his girlfriend doesn't have a motor in the back of her honda? :shrug:


Okay, I have to tell someone, and this is probably the best place. Tonight, on BART, on the way home from class, I saw a grown woman, who was reading a huge book and otherwise looked normal....wait....wait...






REPEATEDLY PICK HER NOSE AND EAT IT!!!!! :eek: :eek:

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hate snot, and everything to do with snot, i was soooo grossed out. I almost got a piece of paper out of my bag, wadded it up, and threw it at her and yelled "quit picking your nose and eating it, you're making me sick!!!!!" But I doubted my ability to hit her with the paper ball at that distance. (although I once pegged a guy who was bending over on the head with a snowball at about 50 feet, but snowballs weigh more than paper).
She was right in my line of sight, too, I had to look all around everywhere else the whole rest of the trip. And all be darned if I didn't accidentally look at her a few minutes later and SHE WAS DOING IT AGAIN!!!
Good lord. :mad:

One time I was at a bar with some friends having a few drinks until we ran out of cash so we just stuck to chatting and dancing. When one of the waitresses asked if I wanted another drink, I said "sorry, no can do..ran out money" and she actually repied with "well why don't you leave then?"

Being the bitch that I am I complained immediately to the manager then called the next day to place another complaint. I'm not sure if she was let go but the bar closed 2 months later. Yayyy!

:lol: :lol: :lol: :xoxo:

Wow, if that story had ended with "and so then we got free drinks for the rest of the night" it would've been a fairy tale close to my heart. :p
By the way, I complained about a Jack in the Box manager the other day. And once before that. Soo....:shocked: :laugh:
But sesly - I said I wanted "blah" and she said "do you want *what you (I) clearly said* or 'blah some other thing that wasn't what you (I) said at all'?" And I was all "no, I want blah, just like I said" and she was all "you know what?!?!?!?! I'm refusing you service, because I can! I don't have to stand here and be humiliated by you!!!!!" and then she almost started crying? :shocked:

Hey, I used to work at a Jack in the Box. It's not that serious, get a grip. And one other time this lady yelled at me, as well. She seems a bit sensitive.

Okay, that is the grossest thing. :eek: And to do it in public. Ewwwww.

Back to buns...:laugh:

Aw, that would've been much better. Although I did get satisfaction from seeing immediate fallout from bad service.

So did you get Mr. JITB fired? And what did he do to deserve it? Spill it!

that is literally the grossest thing I've ever seen in public. Okay, people spit on the street all the time, and that is really gross, too, but apparently a bunch of people think it's okay, so I've grown *somewhat* used to it.
Buns? Seriously, my ass isn't that big, I promise. :laugh: I only wear a 10!

Oh, it's an AFA lady, not a guy, and this just happened last week, so I don't know if I got her fired. Actually, the big JITB corp wants to talk to me about it by phone. Last time I complained I got free coupon thingy. So whatever. I dunno about firing her, that would suck. Although I am kinda scared to go there, now.

If its not fire worthy, then let the JITB corp know. I once had a mailman stalk me, but I didn't think he was a big threat so I didn't want to phone his work otherwise they would probably let him go. The sitch ended up diffusing itself anyway.

But then again if its a fire worthy incident, then FIRE AWAY!

Oh and back to the topic of things you can't believe somebody said out loud...

I was on a first date with a guy and we were at a resteraunt and at one point he looked out the window at a couple with their child and wistfully said "I just can't wait to be a dad someday" and sighed. Ewwwww.

:lol: :lol:
Omigod, you're killing me! See, most other people would think that what the guy said was "so sweet" and that obviously this guy was "kind and giving". But I, like you, would be at least mildly repulsed and frightened by that. :laugh: Must be the aquarian in me.
Oh, and...I would still feel really bad if the person got fired. Life is hard, here. In some kind of fantasy world, I'd just want her to have a pic of me with the caption "don't be rude to this girl, or else we will fire you!" :laugh: Besides, one time she was nice. We also have to acknowledge the fact that I shouldn't be eating at Jack in the Box that much anyway...:laugh:

[QUOTE=amber
REPEATEDLY PICK HER NOSE AND EAT IT!!!!! :eek: :eek: [/QUOTE]

EEEEWWWWW! That's soo gross! :laugh:

I don't understand how people can do that in public. If you have to do it at least wait until you're alone in the bathroom. uggh.

Sad, but hilariously true...
 

One time I was in a toy section at a retailer looking at the Nascar diecasts (Which I was collecting at the time) when the following happened:

Nosey dude: "Are you a F.A.G.?"

Me: "What the f**k...???"

Nosey dude: "I just wanted to know if you a F.A.G...."

Me: "Hell no...I am married and straight..."

Nosey dude: "I didn't mean F.A.G. in a sexual way, I saw you made a sickening look on your face when you saw all those Jeff Gordon cars and wondered if you're a F.A.G....Fans Against Gordon, Which is an online community, Thought you'd might have been a member"

Me: "Oh...Yeah, I guess you could say I am the biggest F.A.G. there is then..."

No sooner then I said that the Toy Dept. manager walked by and gave me the strangest look...Oh well, just my luck it seems...Still a funny moment though!

I know! It seemed like some weird unconscious habit. Like, she looked like a semi nerdy girl, with her big book and glasses and stuff, who is maybe used to being by herself and has her little reading ritual, which is apparently to pick her nose and eat it while she reads. :shocked:

It was funny, cause when I first looked, she was just digging for gold, way up in there, and I was grossed out. But then, sad for me, I lingered my eyes a bit too long and saw the eatage.

Hey, you know, I like to lay in bed and eat cheetos while I read. I thought that was bad. But no. It's not, not compared to this. :laugh:
Oh, by the way, you've seen my bun - it's not that huge, right???:laugh: It's not that noteworthy....lol.

This wasn't said to me, but it was classic.
A friend of mine told me she was once introduced to this woman, and the first thing that the woman said to her was, "Hi, my name is Janet and I haven't had sex in 9 years."
:eek:

WTF ?

Hey, I'm an Aquarian too!

Well then you're going to looooove this:
I had this boyfriend who was kind of a pussy and we were cuddling on the couch with him behind me, my back against his chest. He puts his arms around me, hands on my stomache and says....get this...."I can't wait until you're pregnant with my child".

UGH!!! JESUS CHRIST!!! The relationship ended shortly thereafter.

Hi Janet...
 

here's some batteries, go buy yourself a vibrator...

:shocked: :laugh: that whole thing is really weird, Brian. But funny. :lol: But also kind of cool in a way, b/c there is a whole weird geek lingo for fans against Brian Gordon, which I have no idea about, but I'm still stoked when there's some weird inside lingo for something I like/hate :) It's like if a stranger came up to me and said "hey, are you listening to SDMHA?"

No, no, I'm not an aquarius, but I have rising aquarius, and am just kind of that way. I like some smooshy, cause I am a Cancer, but too much smooshy (or, honestly, even a little more than a little bit, and especially about children) makes me want to hurl and/or punch someone. I only like smooshy about sex stuff, really.
Oh, and...OMIGOD!!!! Blargh!!!! HELP!!! AHHHH! :lol: That's really sweet and everything, but I would've had to barf, and then take double my birth control. And then break up with that person. :woohoo: Good lawd, I thought those men who intimated marriage to me when I was in my twenties were bad. :rolleyes:
But don't feel bad, we've all had those "kind of pussy" boyfriends.

:eek:
Did she teach "how to be a scary bitch 101"?
Good lord, I love these stories, b/c whenever I think I'm hella crazy and ill advised, I can look back and say "No. I'm not crazy. This is crazy." :laugh:

Eeee-yeah, he really wasn't a "kind of pussy". He was a mega-uber-douchebag-pussy. He cried, like ALL the time, over absolutely nothing. And not a single teardop, I'm talkin' full on sobbing, heaving, lip-quivering bawl fests. Seriously, I have never seen anything so disgusting in my entire life. I spent half that relationship in a constant state of dry heave. :distress:

Dude. DUDE!!! Gross. Out. :shocked: :mad: I've started random arguments with BF's just cause they were being pussys. I couldn't take it. Not saying that's right, just saying. It's fine, if someone cries sometimes, it's good, they have feelings and all that. But lets not be a constant acquiescent pussy, mmkay? :laugh:
*note, I think it's fine if someone cries and stuff. No big, I cry a lot. Not usually in front of people, cause I'm kind enough to spare them. But lets not get carried away, okay?*

Nope, sorry, I'm old school. A man can cry if:

1. Someone close to him has died.
2. He gets kicked in the beanbag really hard.
3. The love of his life leaves him for his best friend. Or brother.

Alright, I'm being a little severe, but don't tell me you don't lose your wide-on if a guy is overly emotional. Blech.

Anyway, I'm tired and off to bed to dream about manly men. G'night!