Holidays
 

Am I the only person who has issues with being single during the holidays? I usually don't care to be in a relationship during any other time of year, but between Halloween and Valentine's Day, I get this unbearable need to be coupled.

This year, it's worse because I haven't had any "relations" since the spring, plus both of my roommates have boyfriends and I'm around them all the time. Watching them all be lovey-dovey with each other is really getting to me.

So, yeah...just getting that off my chest. :)

Actually, while I was starting to wrap presents last night, I had a twinge about the last few holidays spent with my ex. Especially seeing some of the leftover things from seasons past. It was VERY fun to buy and wrap stuff for him. However, when I rehashed the reasons we aren't together and how I relish my freedom -the feelings quickly passed. The holidays are feeling so stress free on my own. All the other traditions are still in place. I am throwing an enormous party and the idea of him participating - shheeesh. He made it so stressful. Extremely happy to be on my own ! I don't have to factor someone else's obligations and "issues" into what is a great time of year. But then, I am pretty independent and a naturally happy guy. :wavey:

Gross. lovey dovey roomates. :p
Yeah, I feel that way a bit, but mainly because i want some. Whenever i want. often. and it's kind of lonely too, i suppose...Plus it's so cold... :D Plus i'm alone and no one loves me...thanks, Markolas... :mad: :laugh: :laugh: :wavey:

I have mixed feelings about this. Sometimes I want someone, and then sometimes I don't. It's not worse for me around this time of year. It will be two years in Feb since I have been in a "serious relationship" and I guess the lonliness has worn off.

I think after I graduation I will be more lonely. It will be a new life after that. I will actually have a "real job". I'm moving to a new place and if I am single around this time next year, I will probably be down in the dumps. At the moment, I am ok with it......but it WOULD BE AWESOME if I wasn't single. I'm a LTR kinda guy. :angel:

I am happiest with my two Scotties and will be so this year!!!!!!!

Hehe...
 

Welcome to the club..
 

HELLO??? Hey, I'VE BEEN THERE! Actually I am!!

Though xmas, it's more a family reunion,. all relatives are with husbands or wives, and it's a bit annoying whn they ask.. And when do you get married??? :eek: :eek:

It is worse on Valentine. If I'm single I prefer to stay alone at homes. Besides all places are full,. traffic is a nightmare, etc. I prefer to spend a blockbuster night.

And no pains on New Year's eve. I have fun anyway, no matter being single or with someone, it's always exciting. ;)

Kill them while they're making out. :sorry:
[/QUOTE]
Yeah, I feel that way a bit, but mainly because i want some. Whenever i want. often. and it's kind of lonely too, i suppose...Plus it's so cold... :D Plus i'm alone and no one loves me...thanks, Markolas... :mad: :laugh: :laugh: :wavey:[/QUOTE]

It always sucks for me from about the first of November through New Years Day, then I get over it pretty quickly. The holidays blow, imo.

Yep. My son, err, I mean dog, is a little TOO important in my daily routine. Today, I'm getting Christmas cards made with my holiday avatar on them. Pretty sad, no?

Nah, I don't feel lonely. I'm single by choice and like being able to do what I want when I want to do it. Sometimes I want to be with someone because I just like the company and love being around another person that I can be myself with 24/7, but then I realize that if I really wanted stuff like that, I'd be pursuing it. I'm not, so I guess I don't. :laugh: I've had relationships in the past and I've found myself bored a lot. After awhile, you just get to know someone so much that there's nothing left to get to know. You're sexually alone, everyday stuff becomes even more routine, and I just end up bored as hell. Maybe I just haven't met anyone special, who knows. Doesn't exactly make the prospect of marriage very pleasing.

So, no, I'm not lonely around the holidays. :laugh:

The worst part about the holidays is being asked over to a party or to someone's house for dinner...and the people asking you are either married, engaged, or in love. :lol:

I had two friends from college who got married two years ago and they asked me over for Christmas Eve dinner last year. I got there and everyone else was there with somebody else. :cool: I literally felt like a page that had been ripped out of Bridget Jones's diary. You know the feeling you get from everyone else, that there must be something wrong with you or that you're a sleep-farter or something; the pregnant couples are the WORST, too. It's the most embarassing thing in the world. And they stare at you and condescend you so much that you feel like smacking them upside their heads and then crawling under a rock. Add to that the fact that I had made cookies to bring them but they were burnt to a crisp and I? Was so uncomfortable that I think I wet myself twice.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
That sounds terrible. Nothing like that has ever happened to me, with friends like that...

Oh my, that's why I haven't spoken to them in ages. :laugh: Married folk make single folk feel awful.

When I was last...
 

single (Winter 1990) I enjoyed the wintertime...I was young, dumb and full of ___ and enjoyed the wintertime so much that I splurged on holiday presents for myself, Including the then new Led Zeppelin boxed set (The BEST boxed set EVER!)

Even though I am happily married I miss those fun single years where I did what the hell I wanted to (I still do in a way...But I have to think of someone other than myself now, Which is cool.)

Brian j.

Yeah - since I moved here to Rochester I miss my ex- and the times we had together - but I did the whole "listing reasons we're not together" thing -and yeah - I'm where I want to be right now and I LOVE my freedom...

I've been out with a couple of guys since moving here both of whom annoyed the **** out of me...really really really annoyed me - so yeah I realized after those two fellows that I am not quite ready to date right now -

That said - it is still hard to be single around the holidays ... my work Christmas party is coming up and I"m like..who the hell am I gonna take? I'm going to be the only one alone (except for the gross old creepy guy...) haha - I'll just deal with it though...I'd rather be alone than with someone who I wanted to kill constantly.

Really? I usually feel awful for them, cause they're so fricking bored with each other that they have to have kids, they can't go out, they can't flirt with people when they do go out, and they have to ask each other before they do anything. And, it's possible that neither one gets much *** anymore. That could be why they try to make other people feel bad... :laugh:

Oh, resentment plays a big part in it, definitely. :nod: Now that I think about it, I should have declined and told them I had a nice piece of ass waiting for me instead. :lol:

(I would never say that, though.)

:laugh: :lol: :laugh: (How about "gee, maybe when i get bored dating the Wallenda triplets, I'll join you in the bowels of hell" :D )
I only have one married friend right now, but she's really cool. She loves when we visit each other so she can escape and go out with me and flirt. Her husband is surly if he comes with us, so he doesn't, usually. And also, she can complain about him. Her lament last time was "I can't believe i ever got married. My married friends tricked me and said it would be easier to handle the kids with another person. But it's not, it's harder" :thumbsup: On the good side of that marriage, they still have...
but overall, even though i like to have a boyfriend, i'm really scared of the boredom and possible resentment of marriage... :shrug:

I wouldn't get married to save my life. It's an outdated institution and the expectation that people should get married is ridiculous. If I want to spend the rest of my life with someone, I don't need a piece of paper that says we're going to honor and obey each other. If I want to spend the rest of my life alone, I will. If I want to spend the rest of my life having indiscriminate sex, I will. It all depends on what happens in life. But the one thing I'll never do is get married.

:nod: That's the same thing i've thought every since i was little. Although, I suppose it's possible i would get married...mainly for money reasons, i suppose, if it happened. Know what else i don't understand? Why people spend bazillions of dollars for a wedding. They could save it for the honeymoon, a house, any number of more useful, fun, or longer lasting things. :shrug: I'm getting married at the river, it's gonna be BBQ, and everyone in swimsuits or whatever! :laugh:

Exactly! :thumbsup:

If I ever got married, people would bring their own plates and would be forced to bring some kind of food in order to gain entrance. :]

What a RIDICULOUS waste of money! I've had friend's parents spend 20 or 30k on their weddings. How freakin' stupid. My god, make a big downpayment on a house.........start a big college fund for their kids..........something USEFUL.
And the big weddings are usually the ones that people get stressed out over.
And yes, marriage is an outdated institution.

:laugh: :laugh:
"food or cash?...food? very well, then, right this way" :thumbsup:

20 or 30k? Christ. I mean, if people are rich, then i understand why they would spend a lot, cause it doesn't matter anyway. But for regular people, it just seems a giant waste of money.

I am not opposed to getting married - I am opposed to spending tons of money on a wedding...

my sister and her husband had a semi-big wedding - so my family's been able to do that - I'll have the simple one - outdoors...haha..I don't even care if people come..I mean it's not a big ass show ya know? I think it can be a beautiful thing between two people - I would include those closest to me...but yeah - nothing big and fancy..probably outdoors...

But - I don't want to get married any time in the forseable future...

How dare you talk about my wedding that way! :D hahaha no really w/ what my parents spent on my wedding, we seriously could've had a MAJOR down payment on a house, or college $ for the kids. It was all a big show that my mom could run, and she had the sh*ts for about a year before the actual event from stress. I hardly knew anyone there that day..... I was only allowed to invite a few friends, can you freakin imagine?!

Nice day but in the scheme of things, a waste of $.

-Lis

Let me see if I have this right. Your single females having nobody to give you good lovin? Looks at hand. :rolleyes: Looks at thread. :shocked: Looks at hand. :rolleyes: Looks at thread. :shocked: Looks at hand. :rolleyes: ……….I just don’t get it. :distress:

I've hated the holidays for years now because I broke up with a long term guy and my parents split about 6 years ago. They have completely sucked since. I get so stressed out. But this year I am not going to stress. Thanksgiving was pretty good. I actually am seeing someone but unfortunately he is an elusive chap so we don't spend much time together, I did not see him over Thanksgiving. I do not see this going anywhere which is sad. So I'm with those of you who think buh humbug. But this year I am going to really try to enjoy it since life is too short. Plus now I have my Mufasa (my cat), pets really do make a difference :thumbsup:

I will never get married unless I know it is right. I'd rather be alone than be with the wrong person and feel stuck. Relationships can be a pain in the rear.

One of these days I'm going to write a book called The $2000 Wedding, which is about what I spent for mine.

The dress might be the biggest rip-off. I just wanted a simple ivory dress, which ended up being a spagetti strap ivory bridesmaid dress with a wrap. There were stores that wouldn't even let me look at the bridesmaid section of the books, just "Oh no, the bride's dresses are here." So crazy.

But we had it in our backyard, we borrowed canopies from friends, my mother bought 100 of those plastic lawn chairs because it was end of season and they were actually cheaper than renting chairs. My mother-in-law, who is very crafty, did the flowers. The music was played from my stereo with the speakers outside. I chose a CD of Celtic music, picked a 45 second snippitt out of it, timed enough lag time at the beginning of a tape so that I could hit play and get in position and the music started and I walked down the aisle!

We have two dogwoods in the back yard, so we got married under those, and my husband made all these origami cranes that we tied to the branches, so they fluttered around during the whole thing (my favorite part!).

We had catered wraps (like cold sandwiches), a couple salads, and lots of booze we bought ourselves, and we just hung out in the backyard afterwards. It was great and I wouldn't have done it any differently.

Thing is, I was supposed to get married to someone else about two years before, and that was supposed to be on Halloween ("Nobody gets married on Halloween" :laugh: Name the movie!) with everyone in costume and a rented hall and blah, blah, blah...and I ended up calling off the wedding 10 days before the day. SO it may have been a reaction to that...but it really was a lesson in what's important.

You either buy into the bull**** or you don't...

Well...
 

make sure to be with someone who can cook!!! I'm lucky to have the advantage of being within someone who is a great cook (I too can cook, Which shocks most people), So I have added some weight in the 13+ years we have been together (Plus Deb has stolen all of my usual smartass remarks to use on people :lol: )

Brian "Hmmm...food!!!" j.

Sesly?!
 

And it doesn't seem to be for the bride and groom. It seems to be for the bride's mother. Am I right?
All that stress!!!! And if it ends in divorce in 5 years, that only makes the huge wedding look more ridiculous.

Let's just pop down to the JP and get it over with.
david

I totally enjoyed being married! And the wedding was done at the bargin price of $1500! That's including the dress and the chalet in the mountains for 4 days!

I've been widowed/single for 18 months today. The holidays sucked bad last year. It's quite the adjustment. I made my family completely change the holiday routine so I wouldn't feel so out of place. Last year, I was literally waiting for Jason to walk in at any moment, and it was too much to handle. Spending Christmas morning alone with Sara was depressing. I had to buy myself gifts to put under the tree so Sara wouldn't question why Santa didn't bring Mommy anything. I dunno.... one of these days I will find a good guy who's not an asshole or a bum. Right now, I guess, I'm just trying to be me and be a great mom.

Oh sure! Needless to say I didn't get my dress at any of those stores. It just amazed me how hard they try to make you believe you need the big dress. You really have to be adamant about not buyng in...

My husband is actually quite artistic and is quite good at origami. He made fancier ones and we made them our wedding favors! I remember he did a bear and a deer and a rabbit and stuff like that. But after all those cranes for the trees he said he would be happy if he never did another crane again! :laugh:

The only reason I am sad about being single during the holidays is because I can't use a significant other as an excuse to get out of spending them with my dysfunctional family. And the even sadder part is, I'm totally serious and that really is sad. Can someone point me in the direction of a good "Let It Go" therapist?! (now that was funny.) :lol:

Scrooge McGruff
(aka Laura)

Not me, girl! I'm with you! :D well, I usually overcome by thinking of the presents, and how everyone wants to see ME. :laugh: Also, my parents live in the country, so that is nice...I use the time for detox from smoking... :laugh: Also I find that my mom kisses my a** now that she can't terrorize me and i never see her...mwahahahahahahahahaha!!!! (hey, you have to find holiday joy where you can!) :D Also, my parents have a cute dog...

Well, that's one reason why I don't like being single during the holidays. :lol:
I'm certainly not looking forward to visiting my senile grandmother at the nursing home and feeling like crawling under the nearest bedpan when my crazy aunt starts using racial epithets (in a rather loud voice) to refer to the orderlies.

Yeah, I'd much rather spend Xmas with a boyfriend. :p

Laura, I hear that. This family stuff is so difficult. My whole family is crazy, I don't know where the hell I came from, sesly. I am not bragging, it's just that most of my family seems to lack self-awareness which I never did and I don't know why. :shrug:

I was given a beautiful crane as a gift last year which came from Peace Craft and benefits a good cause, the company contributes to organizations that help end childrens' suffering. :angel: