Funny Children/Sibling Quotes

[StreetAngel95]

Little kids always say the funniest things:

Today, during dinner, my mother was explaining the Boston Blackout to my younger brother:

MOM: Cameron, it was the scariest thing in the world!
MY BROTHER: Not really, just in Boston! :laugh:

that little moment just made my day!

Share some of yours!

[ButterCookie]

My sister comes out with absolute crackers!

Betty Boop = Betty Boobs

Sister: Ooooh bit of Bob Dylan yess
Me: Danielle... that's Bob Marley :|

Whilst watching Rumours Classic Albums she asked who Christine was and got told to f*off :lol:

[tilthefirefades]

Today my 6 year old brother wanted to come to my house to play video games. So my mom told him another time. Well he responds: "I've been waiting all my life for this day though!" :laugh:

The best one however was when my mom took him with her to vote in 08. Well as they are walking in someone asks him who he is voting for.
My Brother: "Abraham Lincoln!"
*everyone laughs*
Brother:"whats so funny?"
Mom: "Well he's been dead a long time"
Brother "Aww man, who am I gonna vote for now?" :laugh:

[StreetAngel95]

Whilst watching Rumours Classic Albums she asked who Christine was and got told to f*off :lol:

haha, go Georgie!:lol:

[ButterCookie]

She be messin' with my girl :p

She calls herself a Mac fan, too. Which is worrying :distress:

[goldustsongbird]

Whilst watching Rumours Classic Albums she asked who Christine was and got told to f*off :lol:

:laugh: Has she learned nothing from living with you!?

[ButterCookie]

:laugh: Has she learned nothing from living with you!?

Terrible language :thumbsup:

I was annoyed with her to say the least AND she interrupted Chris' speech.

[sara1998]

When Sara was about 4, she went to my father and whispered in his ear, "papaw, I'm not supposed to say damn."

[Zombie]

Haha. Kids are hilarious.

Mine seem to come up with the most off-the-wall ****e imaginable sometimes, and it cracks me up. I've already relayed the STYVY NIKS sneaking into my house story that my daughter cobbled together on another thread, but there've been other awesome bits, like:

When my son was first old enough to actually experience Christmas (not as an infant, like), his father was SUPER excited to do the whole Santa Claus thing, so he sat down with Asher one day and was all, "Hey, buddy! Do you know where your Christmas presents come from?" hoping he'd get a "Santa!" or maybe "North Pole!" or something in reply.

Alas, that was not to be - my son's reply, complete with eyeroll? "The closet. Duh."

Another time, I'd taken both kids to the park, and they generally had a hard time leaving when it was time to go, with a lot of whining and such, so that day, I had the brilliant idea that if I made leaving the park a game, they'd be more apt to not pitch a fit about the whole thing.

So I said, "Let's play Simon Says! Simon Says walk like a soldier! Simon Says walk like a duck!" etc. My daughter went along with me as I walked like a duck or whatever, but my son just followed behind us, shuffling his feet and sighing loudly. After a few minutes, I feel a tug on my shirt and look down, and he says, in the most put-upon tone imaginable, "Mom. Simon Says walk NORMAL."

And last one - I was trimming my daughter's bangs one day a few years ago, with my son watching, and he says, "What are you doing?"

"Trimming Mimi's bangs," I say.

"What's bangs?"

"A GIRL THING!" Mimi pipes up.

"Only girls have bangs?" he says.

"YES!" Mimi says.

And before I can correct this assumption, he nods sagely and says, "Oh! I get it. Girls have bangs, and boys have testicles!" and promptly walks off, apparently secure in his newfound knowledge of the ways of anatomy.

I lol'd.

[sara1998]

Haha. Kids are hilarious.

Mine seem to come up with the most off-the-wall ****e imaginable sometimes, and it cracks me up. I've already relayed the STYVY NIKS sneaking into my house story that my daughter cobbled together on another thread, but there've been other awesome bits, like:

When my son was first old enough to actually experience Christmas (not as an infant, like), his father was SUPER excited to do the whole Santa Claus thing, so he sat down with Asher one day and was all, "Hey, buddy! Do you know where your Christmas presents come from?" hoping he'd get a "Santa!" or maybe "North Pole!" or something in reply.

Alas, that was not to be - my son's reply, complete with eyeroll? "The closet. Duh."

Another time, I'd taken both kids to the park, and they generally had a hard time leaving when it was time to go, with a lot of whining and such, so that day, I had the brilliant idea that if I made leaving the park a game, they'd be more apt to not pitch a fit about the whole thing.

So I said, "Let's play Simon Says! Simon Says walk like a soldier! Simon Says walk like a duck!" etc. My daughter went along with me as I walked like a duck or whatever, but my son just followed behind us, shuffling his feet and sighing loudly. After a few minutes, I feel a tug on my shirt and look down, and he says, in the most put-upon tone imaginable, "Mom. Simon Says walk NORMAL."

And last one - I was trimming my daughter's bangs one day a few years ago, with my son watching, and he says, "What are you doing?"

"Trimming Mimi's bangs," I say.

"What's bangs?"

"A GIRL THING!" Mimi pipes up.

"Only girls have bangs?" he says.

"YES!" Mimi says.

And before I can correct this assumption, he nods sagely and says, "Oh! I get it. Girls have bangs, and boys have testicles!" and promptly walks off, apparently secure in his newfound knowledge of the ways of anatomy.

I lol'd.

OMG! The closet thing. Sara was about 8 is when she found out there was no Santa. Actually, it started with Easter. I guess she found the basket in the closet without me knowing. Of course, I hid the basket on Easter Sunday and when she found it, she asked me where the basket was from the Easter Bunny. I told her, "That is the basket from the Easter Bunny!" "Nuh Uh mom! That's the one from the closet that's been there for the past week!" I couldn't come up with any excuse on the fly, so I told her I am the Easter Bunny! She didn't like that one bit. Poor kid started crying and asked me about Santa. I told her I'm Santa too, and the tooth fairy. I'll tell you what... LMAO! She started bawling even harder and yelled at me, "You LIED, mommy, you LIED to me!!!" Once she went to her room and slammed the door, I couldn't help but to crack up at her. Poor kid was pretty traumatized.

I should tell you guys about the vibrator incident soon.

[ButterCookie]

I should tell you guys about the vibrator incident soon.

:shocked: If that's what I think it is... I was the poor child in my household. It's haunted me ever since.

[blondyy-x]

:shocked: If that's what I think it is... I was the poor child in my household. It's haunted me ever since.

LMAO i was the poor childs best friend rolling on the floor laughing so hard holding my stomach while my friend stood traumatized. Y'know, that friend?

[ButterCookie]

Bahahahaa YES! It's funny when the mum finds... Not in the slightest bit funny AT ALL the other way round. Amy, quit raking up memories aagh, I'd done my best to forget that horrible traumatizing incident!

[Meowi]

Last night, Destiny Rules was on tv - so we watched five minutes of it.
(My Mum and Dad are casual fans)

Mum: What year was this Matt?
Me: Ah, about 2003
Mum: What! Stevie looks a baby, she must have had surgery!
Little Sister: Mum, witches will always be ugly!

[Zombie]

OMG! The closet thing. Sara was about 8 is when she found out there was no Santa. Actually, it started with Easter. I guess she found the basket in the closet without me knowing. Of course, I hid the basket on Easter Sunday and when she found it, she asked me where the basket was from the Easter Bunny. I told her, "That is the basket from the Easter Bunny!" "Nuh Uh mom! That's the one from the closet that's been there for the past week!" I couldn't come up with any excuse on the fly, so I told her I am the Easter Bunny! She didn't like that one bit. Poor kid started crying and asked me about Santa. I told her I'm Santa too, and the tooth fairy. I'll tell you what... LMAO! She started bawling even harder and yelled at me, "You LIED, mommy, you LIED to me!!!" Once she went to her room and slammed the door, I couldn't help but to crack up at her. Poor kid was pretty traumatized.

I should tell you guys about the vibrator incident soon.

LOL, I love it.

Does your vibrator incident involve your 3 year old finding where you stashed yours in the closet and bringing it to the HVAC guy? Because once that happens, you realize that safety-proofing the house, besides covering the wall sockets and plastering Mr Yuk stickers all over every available surface, also includes putting any items of such interest WAY THE F*CK UP HIGH ON A SHELF.

Ahem.

Mr. HVAC Guy, if you are reading this, I'm still real sorry about that.

[sara1998]

LOL, I love it.

Does your vibrator incident involve your 3 year old finding where you stashed yours in the closet and bringing it to the HVAC guy? Because once that happens, you realize that safety-proofing the house, besides covering the wall sockets and plastering Mr Yuk stickers all over every available surface, also includes putting any items of such interest WAY THE F*CK UP HIGH ON A SHELF.

Ahem.

Mr. HVAC Guy, if you are reading this, I'm still real sorry about that.

haha! haaahhaahah! lmao! I'll type out the story tonight. It's pretty funny. I can't wait to traumatize her about it when she's older.

[ButterCookie]

haha! haaahhaahah! lmao! I'll type out the story tonight. It's pretty funny. I can't wait to traumatize her about it when she's older.

Have mercy! Oh god! It'll stay with her for the rest of her life, don't rake up the horrible memories http://i43.tinypic.com/vgkkye.png I've still not got over it :(

[jaycee]

OMG! The closet thing. Sara was about 8 is when she found out there was no Santa. Actually, it started with Easter. I guess she found the basket in the closet without me knowing. Of course, I hid the basket on Easter Sunday and when she found it, she asked me where the basket was from the Easter Bunny. I told her, "That is the basket from the Easter Bunny!" "Nuh Uh mom! That's the one from the closet that's been there for the past week!" I couldn't come up with any excuse on the fly, so I told her I am the Easter Bunny! She didn't like that one bit. Poor kid started crying and asked me about Santa. I told her I'm Santa too, and the tooth fairy. I'll tell you what... LMAO! She started bawling even harder and yelled at me, "You LIED, mommy, you LIED to me!!!" Once she went to her room and slammed the door, I couldn't help but to crack up at her. Poor kid was pretty traumatized.

I should tell you guys about the vibrator incident soon.

It's funny you say that - in a recent interview with Andrew Denton, Richard Dawkins revealed how perplexed he is that most kids are so complacent about the fact that their parents have actively lied to them about Santa, Easter Bunny etc. (although they're often less than amused about the fact they doesn't exist). I think I was somewhat annoyed my parents had lied to me, and that I was always appreciating/thanking the wrong people for the gifts for so long, but I didn't actually care that much about it all... just briefly went a bit silent from memory.
Anyway, my sister (7) has been saying this for a good few years now, whenever she tickles my brother (9):
"Tickle tickle tickle! Smile little boy!"
:shrug: It just sounds weird to me whenever she says it... :laugh:

[Zombie]

haha! haaahhaahah! lmao! I'll type out the story tonight. It's pretty funny. I can't wait to traumatize her about it when she's older.

Can't wait to hear it. At least I know I'm not alone with that one. It's never happened again, though - I am VERY careful about where the...er...toys...live now.

It's funny you say that - in a recent interview with Andrew Denton, Richard Dawkins revealed how perplexed he is that most kids are so complacent about the fact that their parents have actively lied to them about Santa, Easter Bunny etc. (although they're often less than amused about the fact they doesn't exist). I think I was somewhat annoyed my parents had lied to me, and that I was always appreciating/thanking the wrong people for the gifts for so long, but I didn't actually care that much about it all... just briefly went a bit silent from memory.

My kids weren't upset with me because I never actively told them any of that stuff was real. When they'd ask, I'd say, "What do you think?" instead. For a little while, they'd say, "It's real!" but eventually were like, "Yeah, no."

I am trying to teach them to be freethinkers that can use logic & reason & their own instincts to determine what's what, whether it's Santa or religion or whatever.

[sara1998]

Sara and the vibrator. Heh.

First off, she was 4, and has no recollection of the incident. Secondly, it wasn't mine. We were at a good friends house... (not sure which is worse, finding mine or my friends!)

Okay, so the girls, Sara and Shelby, were playing in the back bedroom. We thought they were in Shelby's room. Anyhow, Melinda and I were in the living room talking, TV, something. Melinda was sitting in a position where she could see the hallway leading to the bedrooms. I had no idea what was going on until after it happened! All of the sudden I hear Sara come out complaining about something, and then Melinda literally sprang up from her chair and went running down the hallway! I was so confused. She came back in tears, laughing hysterically. I guess Sara was walking down the hallway, vibrator not only in her hand, but turned on, holding it up against her cheek, complaining that "She-e-elb-b-b-y's try-y-y-yin-g-g-g to
ta-a-a-ake this toy-y-y away-y-y from me-e-e-e-e-e!"

I smile everytime I fast forward 15 years, and I get to tell this story at her wedding reception.... haha!

[carrie721]

^ haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahaha oh christ!

[sara1998]

My kids weren't upset with me because I never actively told them any of that stuff was real. When they'd ask, I'd say, "What do you think?" instead. For a little while, they'd say, "It's real!" but eventually were like, "Yeah, no."

I am trying to teach them to be freethinkers that can use logic & reason & their own instincts to determine what's what, whether it's Santa or religion or whatever.

I told Sara about Santa and the Easter Bunny just as much as any parent, I suppose. Religion is hers to figure out for herself, though. Santa and the Bunny aren't a big deal, but I think religion is a very personal decision. She's asked my what my views are, and I simply explained to her I believe there is a God, but I don't believe in organized religions. She's asked me if I would be mad if she tried reading a Bible, and I gave her my childhood Bible and told her it was up to her if she wanted to, and to draw her own conclusions. She goes to church with a friend every once in a while... It's just something I'm going to let her experiment with and figure out for herself. I had part of my family trying to cram it down my throat and I didn't like it one bit.

[sara1998]

^ haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahaha oh christ!

I know, right? This is the same friend that would have sex toy parties. She got so much free and discounted product, she nearly filled a trash bag with it. The same trash bag that ripped, while she was moving, in the middle of the living room, in front of God and everyone. Good times... goooood times....:lol:

[carrie721]

I know, right? This is the same friend that would have sex toy parties. She got so much free and discounted product, she nearly filled a trash bag with it. The same trash bag that ripped, while she was moving, in the middle of the living room, in front of God and everyone. Good times... goooood times....:lol:

HAHAHA.

that's awesome.

OT, but i once lost a "toy" while moving. still have no idea who or what ended up with it.

[blondyy-x]

Sara and the vibrator. Heh.

First off, she was 4, and has no recollection of the incident. Secondly, it wasn't mine. We were at a good friends house... (not sure which is worse, finding mine or my friends!)

Okay, so the girls, Sara and Shelby, were playing in the back bedroom. We thought they were in Shelby's room. Anyhow, Melinda and I were in the living room talking, TV, something. Melinda was sitting in a position where she could see the hallway leading to the bedrooms. I had no idea what was going on until after it happened! All of the sudden I hear Sara come out complaining about something, and then Melinda literally sprang up from her chair and went running down the hallway! I was so confused. She came back in tears, laughing hysterically. I guess Sara was walking down the hallway, vibrator not only in her hand, but turned on, holding it up against her cheek, complaining that "She-e-elb-b-b-y's try-y-y-yin-g-g-g to
ta-a-a-ake this toy-y-y away-y-y from me-e-e-e-e-e!"

I smile everytime I fast forward 15 years, and I get to tell this story at her wedding reception.... haha!

LMFAO. Oh my god.

[StreetAngel95]

sorry to bump, but my brother just told me the funniest things!:

i was playing "Mirror, Mirror" in my room, and you know how the beginning sounds like a news theme? My brother comes in and goes:
"Stevie Nicks is on the news? I thought she was a waitress?"

I laughed so hard, and then he follows up with:
"Miranda, i'm on a roll! But the hot dog is on a bun!"

[Meowi]

sorry to bump, but my brother just told me the funniest things!:

i was playing "Mirror, Mirror" in my room, and you know how the beginning sounds like a news theme? My brother comes in and goes:
"Stevie Nicks is on the news? I thought she was a waitress?"

I laughed so hard, and then he follows up with:
"Miranda, i'm on a roll! But the hot dog is on a bun!"


BAHAHAHA!
How old is your bro,
He is so random...

[StreetAngel95]

BAHAHAHA!
How old is your bro,
He is so random...

he's 10....he should actually act more mature than he is now, but whatevers....people mistake him for 8:D haha

[jaycee]

sorry to bump, but my brother just told me the funniest things!:

i was playing "Mirror, Mirror" in my room, and you know how the beginning sounds like a news theme? My brother comes in and goes:
"Stevie Nicks is on the news? I thought she was a waitress?"

I laughed so hard, and then he follows up with:
"Miranda, i'm on a roll! But the hot dog is on a bun!"

It seems my pure awesome has been outdone... :lol: Obviously I should be taking lessons from your brother - he sounds extremely witty! :nod: