Children with ADHD

[nickay]

Anyone have any suggestions on how to discipline a girl age 10 with ADHD .My daughter thinks she is 18 and is only 10 going through pre-adolescence. I think I have tried anything ,but I am open to ideas . :confused:

[jannieC]

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy/Behavior Modification is the most common used with children who have ADHD. Basically, it involves direct negative or positive reinforcement of desired behavioral changes. Your daughter would probably benefit by working with a therapist on this. Is she on meds?

[xdreamsunwindx]

I don't have any kids, nor am I experienced with ADHD, but I think it's normal for kids around that age to think they're grownups. I mean, I thought I was 20 when I was 10. A lot of little girls I know do. But maybe that's just me. Good luck.

[nickay]

yes , she is on medication to control impulsive behaviors . Last year she was on 5 different meds at one time . Because of the amount of meds and or dosage her doctor took her off all but one . Behavior therapy ??? Where I live the only type of therapy they have is group. Not individual

[jannieC]

yes , she is on medication to control impulsive behaviors . Last year she was on 5 different meds at one time . Because of the amount of meds and or dosage her doctor took her off all but one . Behavior therapy ??? Where I live the only type of therapy they have is group. Not individual

Well that really sucks. Group is okay though! It can help as far as lifting her (healthy level) of self-esteem and let her see that she's not alone. You may want to make a drive into a neighboring city for some individual counseling though. What you may want to do is find a group for you, as her parent. You'll probably have better luck finding a group like that, and maybe you can learn from other parents how they are successfully doing things- what works and doesn't work for them.

[nickay]

Well that really sucks. Group is okay though! It can help as far as lifting her (healthy level) of self-esteem and let her see that she's not alone. You may want to make a drive into a neighboring city for some individual counseling though. What you may want to do is find a group for you, as her parent. You'll probably have better luck finding a group like that, and maybe you can learn from other parents how they are successfully doing things- what works and doesn't work for them.

I was thinking about sending her to a summer camp that helped deal with ADHD , but the closes one is North Caolina and is very expensive

[jannieC]

I was thinking about sending her to a summer camp that helped deal with ADHD , but the closes one is North Caolina and is very expensive

What does her school counselor say? Maybe he or she can help you find some help.

[nickay]

What does her school counselor say? Maybe he or she can help you find some help.

Her school counselor really doesnt have alot to say about it. She isnt very helpful on the issue.

[Kelly]

The school counselor was a joke when it came to my son and his ADD. He is not hyper but could not concentrate and had horrendous impulse control when he was in school. He is actually a really good kid with no problems at home, they were all in school. He was just not able to sit and focus on the work without getting distracted. Then, he would compensate for feeling different by doing stupid things. I had him in private therapy, school counseling (fricking joke!) and did a bunch of behavior modification stuff at home to try to encourage good behavior in school. NOthing worked, his grades were suffering, his teacher was frustrated....so his pediatrician finally put him on Concerta. I resisted that for three years because I feel he is too young for meds and the school wants them on medicine for every little thing. However, it has been a blessing for him. He has done a complete 180 in school. His teacher called me in tears and said she could not believe the change in him. She said he was like a different child. He went from Cs and D's to straight A's last marking period. He was just Student of the Month, something he has never, ever been. So, medicine works for some and doesn't work for others. I would never recommend it without trying other things first. I am so glad I listened to the doctor and just tried him on medicine because it has completely changed his future in school. He actually wants to go, instead of despises it. I know how frustrating these problems can be and when they are hyper, it can be extremely trying to deal with. Ryan is far from hyper, he is actually really quiet and introverted. I would seriously consider some sort of strict behavior modification regimine at home. Like a reward and consequence system for following and not following your rules. Start out small and use lots of positive reinforcement. Pick your battles as far as what you want to see change at first. Reward her with something she really wants when she follows the rules you have set down. Give her a consequence and stick to it, when she does not follow your rules. It can be extremely tiresome to put so much effort into her behavior but Beh. Mod does work for some kids. If she were my child, I think I might also try to find her some counseling outside of school. Like a private therapist or something. If you do not have the funds or insurance, there are often programs to help with this. Lastly, I would request a Child Study Team evaluation in school, if you haven't already done so. They will evaluate her in a few different areas and see if she qualifies for any special services or help in certain areas. Good Luck with everything.

[nickay]

The school counselor was a joke when it came to my son and his ADD. He is not hyper but could not concentrate and had horrendous impulse control when he was in school. He is actually a really good kid with no problems at home, they were all in school. He was just not able to sit and focus on the work without getting distracted. Then, he would compensate for feeling different by doing stupid things. I had him in private therapy, school counseling (fricking joke!) and did a bunch of behavior modification stuff at home to try to encourage good behavior in school. NOthing worked, his grades were suffering, his teacher was frustrated....so his pediatrician finally put him on Concerta. I resisted that for three years because I feel he is too young for meds and the school wants them on medicine for every little thing. However, it has been a blessing for him. He has done a complete 180 in school. His teacher called me in tears and said she could not believe the change in him. She said he was like a different child. He went from Cs and D's to straight A's last marking period. He was just Student of the Month, something he has never, ever been. So, medicine works for some and doesn't work for others. I would never recommend it without trying other things first. I am so glad I listened to the doctor and just tried him on medicine because it has completely changed his future in school. He actually wants to go, instead of despises it. I know how frustrating these problems can be and when they are hyper, it can be extremely trying to deal with. Ryan is far from hyper, he is actually really quiet and introverted. I would seriously consider some sort of strict behavior modification regimine at home. Like a reward and consequence system for following and not following your rules. Start out small and use lots of positive reinforcement. Pick your battles as far as what you want to see change at first. Reward her with something she really wants when she follows the rules you have set down. Give her a consequence and stick to it, when she does not follow your rules. It can be extremely tiresome to put so much effort into her behavior but Beh. Mod does work for some kids. If she were my child, I think I might also try to find her some counseling outside of school. Like a private therapist or something. If you do not have the funds or insurance, there are often programs to help with this. Lastly, I would request a Child Study Team evaluation in school, if you haven't already done so. They will evaluate her in a few different areas and see if she qualifies for any special services or help in certain areas. Good Luck with everything.


My daughter has been on medicine since she was five yrs. old. The school has been extremely not helpful with her problems. All they have to say is that she is "Spirited Child" . Everything that I have done in recards to treatment for her was done without the school or doctors help. To me they see my daughter as a test object and just try anything , not really researching the effects. Her grades have increasingly gotten worse with medication. She sytarted off with A , B & C. Throughout the year ,with med changes her grades dropped to C& D's . Her ability to focus in class and follow simple instructions has bottomed out. she hates school as a result of no one-on -one instuction. The teachers at her school dont want to take the time to teach her ,yet they refuse to give her the assisstance she needs . They beleive she capiable of doing the work that she is given . I think her report card shows different 3 D's and the reast C's . They dont beleive she has a learning disablitiy . Her doctor just writes the scripts and sends us on our way as fast as we came in . We have tired every medication used to treat ADHD . We have tired postive rewards and things. The medication concerta is reallly good !! she had alot of growth taking that med . I think now its not so much the ADHD thats the problem its just she is going into pre-teen stage . I thank you for your advice

[SuzeQuze]

My daughter has been on medicine since she was five yrs. old. The school has been extremely not helpful with her problems. All they have to say is that she is "Spirited Child" . Everything that I have done in recards to treatment for her was done without the school or doctors help. To me they see my daughter as a test object and just try anything , not really researching the effects. Her grades have increasingly gotten worse with medication. She sytarted off with A , B & C. Throughout the year ,with med changes her grades dropped to C& D's . Her ability to focus in class and follow simple instructions has bottomed out. she hates school as a result of no one-on -one instuction. The teachers at her school dont want to take the time to teach her ,yet they refuse to give her the assisstance she needs . They beleive she capiable of doing the work that she is given . I think her report card shows different 3 D's and the reast C's . They dont beleive she has a learning disablitiy . Her doctor just writes the scripts and sends us on our way as fast as we came in . We have tired every medication used to treat ADHD . We have tired postive rewards and things. The medication concerta is reallly good !! she had alot of growth taking that med . I think now its not so much the ADHD thats the problem its just she is going into pre-teen stage . I thank you for your advice

Is it your pediatrician prescribing the meds? If so, it would be good to get her to a psychiatrist. Clearly the pediatricion doesn't know what he's doing. As far as what you do, just be consistent. She is all over the place and needs you to be steady.

I don't have children but my brother has ADHD and my parents struggled hard with it. It's only now in adulthood that he knows he's smart because he's done so well at work. That's cuz he's interested. ADHD people can hyperfocus when they are interested.

Also, I'm sure there are some good books on the subject you could check out. If you're better informed you'll make better choices. Good luck, I know what a challenge a "spirited child" is! God I used to babysit my brother and I would get in trouble for what he did. I'm like, you guys can't control him what makes you think an 11 year old can? Ugh.

Kelly, I wish my brother had gotten the kind of help your child did. He was put on Ritalin which gave him a tic so my mother took him off it. She's not very pro-med anyway. It was just a sniffle so I probly would have kept him on it if he were my son because he said it helped him.

I also have ADHD but without hyperactivity and I didn't really realize it until I was an adult. I didn't have trouble in school until highschool and in college I was motivated to do well so I did very well. But it was so hard. In hindsight I wish I'd gotten treated because I knew I had a problem with attention but I just drank coffee!

[Kelly]

Is it your pediatrician prescribing the meds? If so, it would be good to get her to a psychiatrist. Clearly the pediatricion doesn't know what he's doing. As far as what you do, just be consistent. She is all over the place and needs you to be steady.

I don't have children but my brother has ADHD and my parents struggled hard with it. It's only now in adulthood that he knows he's smart because he's done so well at work. That's cuz he's interested. ADHD people can hyperfocus when they are interested.

Also, I'm sure there are some good books on the subject you could check out. If you're better informed you'll make better choices. Good luck, I know what a challenge a "spirited child" is! God I used to babysit my brother and I would get in trouble for what he did. I'm like, you guys can't control him what makes you think an 11 year old can? Ugh.

Kelly, I wish my brother had gotten the kind of help your child did. He was put on Ritalin which gave him a tic so my mother took him off it. She's not very pro-med anyway. It was just a sniffle so I probly would have kept him on it if he were my son because he said it helped him.

I also have ADHD but without hyperactivity and I didn't really realize it until I was an adult. I didn't have trouble in school until highschool and in college I was motivated to do well so I did very well. But it was so hard. In hindsight I wish I'd gotten treated because I knew I had a problem with attention but I just drank coffee!


Yea, the meds can have some serious side effects, so you have to sort of weight the pros and cons. Ryan doesn't have too many side effects, just a decreased appetite during the day (he eats like a horse at night when it wears off though, so its no big deal) and he doesn't fall asleep too easily. However, they are totally managable and the benefits far, far outweight the negative side effects. He actually told me this morning that he never ever wants to go to school without his medicine again. So, he obviously feels much better and more "normal" when he takes it. He is only eight years old and that is a pretty profound statement to make at his age. It's funny you mention drinking coffee because that can be very beneficial for ADD or ADHD. Its a stimulant, just like the medicines are, so you can get the same basic effects. (short term) They just do not last all day and who wants to give their five year old coffee? :laugh:

[jannieC]

Nickay, I think if your daughter is not responding to any ADHD meds and is not responding to any ADHD behavior modification, you may want to consider having her re-evaluated by a psychiatrist.

Typically, when a child has severe ADD/ADHD, the experience with medication is similar to what Kelly expressed with her son.

[skcin]

I agree with Suze, meds should be prescribed & monitored by a pediatric psychiatrist. And like Jannie said, in conjunction with therapy. Hope things get better for you & your family soon. :xoxo:

[WildHeart69]

did ADHD exhist 20 years ago???

[jannieC]

did ADHD exhist 20 years ago???
Did it exist or was it being diagnosed 20 years ago?

<i>ADHD was first described by Dr. Heinrich Hoffman in 1845. A physician who wrote books on medicine and psychiatry, Dr. Hoffman was also a poet who became interested in writing for children when he couldn't find suitable materials to read to his 3-year-old son. The result was a book of poems, complete with illustrations, about children and their characteristics. "The Story of Fidgety Philip" was an accurate description of a little boy who had attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Yet it was not until 1902 that Sir George F. Still published a series of lectures to the Royal College of Physicians in England in which he described a group of impulsive children with significant behavioral problems, caused by a genetic dysfunction and not by poor child rearing—children who today would be easily recognized as having ADHD.1 Since then, several thousand scientific papers on the disorder have been published, providing information on its nature, course, causes, impairments, and treatments.</i>

[BombaySapphire3]

did ADHD exhist 20 years ago???

I was diagnosed with "Hyperkinetic disorder " at 7 years old in 1970 and was a first generation Ritalin kid and thankfully i was on it less than a year.The term ADHD didn't come into use until the early 1980s and now I believe they are overusing the diagnosis and being too cavilier with giving children multiple drugs .I'm not saying drugs don't help with the disorder but the side effects should be weighed against the benefits.I have not taken anything for it in 37 years and we now know 70% of males don't outgrow all the symptoms so it is still a struggle for me every day .I'm just very hesitant to use the drugs.

[jannieC]

I was diagnosed with "Hyperkinetic disorder " at 7 years old in 1970 and was a first generation Ritalin kid and thankfully i was on it less than a year.The term ADHD didn't come into use until the early 1980s and now I believe they are overusing the diagnosis and being too cavilier with giving children multiple drugs .I'm not saying drugs don't help with the disorder but the side effects should be weighed against the benefits.I have not taken anything for it in 37 years and we now know 70% of males don't outgrow all the symptoms so it is still a struggle for me every day .I'm just very hesitant to use the drugs.

I agree that the diagnosis of ADD/ADHD is largely overused. I am not a proponent of meds, I totally agree with what you said. However, I do believe that if a child has been diagnosed with ADHD, given a ton of meds and has not responded to them or any behavioral therapy, she probably should be re-evaluated.

[irishgrl]

did ADHD exhist 20 years ago???
it existed 40 years ago. I should know. When I was 5 or 6 (it was early 60's) I was diagnosed as "hyperactive" and prescribed Ritalin. In those days, Ritalin was much stronger and I was a zombie on it so my mom stopped giving it to me. I'd venture to say that its probably always existed and we are only really recognizing it in the last 50 years for what it is....

two of my three children also have it. my son is currently on meds but on the weakest dose. it was night and day for him. and I am not a pill-popper advocate. I fought this for a long time but when I saw that he responded so quickly, I knew I made a mistake by waiting so long. any longer and his academics would have suffered, and that wouldnt have been fair to him. So, while I hate the fact my son has to take meds, I know that it eases his life so much more than it complicates it.

if the day ever comes when he starts losing weight or cant sleep, then I'll try other avenues. But seriously, I hope that day doesnt come, because truthfully, behavior modification has not worked for him. sigh...

[irishgrl]

I was diagnosed with "Hyperkinetic disorder " at 7 years old in 1970 and was a first generation Ritalin kid and thankfully i was on it less than a year.The term ADHD didn't come into use until the early 1980s and now I believe they are overusing the diagnosis and being too cavilier with giving children multiple drugs .I'm not saying drugs don't help with the disorder but the side effects should be weighed against the benefits.I have not taken anything for it in 37 years and we now know 70% of males don't outgrow all the symptoms so it is still a struggle for me every day .I'm just very hesitant to use the drugs.
it should also be noted that many adults with ADD/ADHD self-medicate.

[Kelly]

it existed 40 years ago. I should know. When I was 5 or 6 (it was early 60's) I was diagnosed as "hyperactive" and prescribed Ritalin. In those days, Ritalin was much stronger and I was a zombie on it so my mom stopped giving it to me. I'd venture to say that its probably always existed and we are only really recognizing it in the last 50 years for what it is....

two of my three children also have it. my son is currently on meds but on the weakest dose. it was night and day for him. and I am not a pill-popper advocate. I fought this for a long time but when I saw that he responded so quickly, I knew I made a mistake by waiting so long. any longer and his academics would have suffered, and that wouldnt have been fair to him. So, while I hate the fact my son has to take meds, I know that it eases his life so much more than it complicates it.

if the day ever comes when he starts losing weight or cant sleep, then I'll try other avenues. But seriously, I hope that day doesnt come, because truthfully, behavior modification has not worked for him. sigh...

I feel the same way. I actually felt so guilty for letting my own fears about meds prohibit me from just trying them earlier. I keep thinking I could have prevented two school years of Hell for my son. I kept dismissing the idea and saying they were overused, blah blah. He has had a completely positive result from the lowest possible dose of time released Concerta. I swear I broke down and cried when he told me he got Student of the Month because that is totally based on grades, behavior and respect for others. He has never gotten that in three years of school and he was soooo proud of himself. Going from C's and D's to straight A's is a huge accomplishment for him, so obviously he needs medication. I hope he never has to go up on his dose but his doctor keeps telling me he is on a very low dose and not to worry about it. I trust his pediatrician because they moniter all my kids extremely closely, even calling to follow up the first week they had him on Concerta. It's rare to have a pedicatrian's office call and say "Hello, Dr Keilmyer was wondering how Ryan is responding to his new medication". :shocked:

[jannieC]

if the day ever comes when he starts losing weight or cant sleep, then I'll try other avenues. But seriously, I hope that day doesnt come, because truthfully, behavior modification has not worked for him. sigh...

Did the medication <i>only</i> help him or does he use it in conjunction with therapy?

[petep9000]

did ADHD exhist 20 years ago???

Oh yes, definately. Only it wasn't called that. I remember very well, when I was in first grade in 1976, there was a new boy who joined my class. His mother came with him the first day and introduced him to our teacher Mrs. Dewitt and explained that David had a special problem and as a result could only eat certain foods that were packed by her. I remember Mrs. Dewitt using the word 'hyper', and this was in 1976! I just remember David couldn't have any wheat, or sugar. And one day David was found in the back closet of the classroom munching on a baggie of pretzels he stole from another kids lunch and was crying when he got caught and went into a tantrum.

So yes, it existed. And this forward-thinking mother was trying to correct it by eliminating sugar and empty carbs from his diet. By 1976, processed carbs were already starting to infiltrate the US menu and were being marketed to kids.

I'm 37 and will have no children. But if I did, you can be sure there would be no soda or juice boxes in my house, no pop-tarts, sugared cereals, 'hot pockets' or other mass-produced crap that mother's feed to their kids these days. I blame alot of today's ADHD on kid's crappy diets loaded with refined flour, corn sugar and artificial dyes and preservatives.

[irishgrl]

Did the medication <i>only</i> help him or does he use it in conjunction with therapy?
not sure what you mean by "therapy" but my son sees the school counselor every week...also another special counselor but that was only for 8 weeks and that time ran out.

to answer your question, tho, my son was seeing the counselor before he was taking the meds and that didnt help. The meds had an IMMEDIATE impact. Night and Day. I felt so bad for waiting so long when it was obvious that he could have had help sooner if I had not resisted.

[jannieC]

not sure what you mean by "therapy" but my son sees the school counselor every week...also another special counselor but that was only for 8 weeks and that time ran out.

to answer your question, tho, my son was seeing the counselor before he was taking the meds and that didnt help. The meds had an IMMEDIATE impact. Night and Day. I felt so bad for waiting so long when it was obvious that he could have had help sooner if I had not resisted.

I believe it. As I mentioned in an earlier post, most children who truly have ADHD respond dramatically to the medication. I'm glad your son was one of those kids. I'm just always curious about the therapy side of it- if it's even necessary if the child is responding so well to the meds. I did a lot of therapy with ADD/ADHD children last year and I wonder how effective it really was.

[Kelly]

I believe it. As I mentioned in an earlier post, most children who truly have ADHD respond dramatically to the medication. I'm glad your son was one of those kids. I'm just always curious about the therapy side of it- if it's even necessary if the child is responding so well to the meds. I did a lot of therapy with ADD/ADHD children last year and I wonder how effective it really was.

I think the issue with ADHD/ADD and therapy is really complicated. If the child also has some underlying emotional problems, plus ADHD, I can see therapy helping. My son had behavioral problems caused by his ADD so he was sent to a counselor. He really wasn't even able to interact with the counselor effectively while off the meds because he was very defensive when asked about any of his behavior issues. Now? He goes to the school counselor and they have no problems talking and addressing things. Honestly, I don't even think he needs to go anymore and after this school year, he won't be. (the school says) His behavior and emotional issues pretty much went away completely when he started the meds. Alot of it, for Ryan, was just his frustration with the way he was feeling, not understanding what was being taught or asked of him, etc, so he would react inappropriately to any criticism or direction. I really think with some children, once they are on the meds, the need for therapy goes away. So, would therapy have ever been beneficial in the first place for a child like that? It's hard to say. I am always a proponent of therapy but honestly, with Ryan he could have been in therapy five days a week for two years straight and I do not think it would have changed much. Once his body chemicals were changed, that is where the postive result came.