Article on "All We Are Saying" (Arquette's documentary)

[Livia]

http://www.timesdispatch.com/servlet/Satellite?pagename=RTD%2FMGArticle%2FRTD_BasicArticle&%09s=1045855936364&c=MGArticle&cid=1137834439375&path=!weekend!music



Sound of repetition
Big names -- not deep insight -- key to Arquette's documentary
MELISSA RUGGIERI
MUSIC CRITIC
Thursday, March 2, 2006


Chrissie Hynde lying on a hotel bed, mindlessly futzing with the zipper on her hoodie and singing themes from cowboy TV shows of the 1950s is unquestionably engaging.

Steven Tyler complaining that, "There was a time when our catalog was worth $24 million. Now it's worth, like, 12 cents," because of illegal downloading, is either another example of a whiny, rich rock star or the moment you join his crusade and want to beat up that Napster guy.

But no brilliant insights are unveiled in "All We Are Saying," an occasionally interesting glance at the frustrations of some top-notch musicians. The documentary, the baby of actor/director/heartbreaker of rock stars Rosanna Arquette, bowed last April at the Tribeca Film Festival and gets its public debut at 8 p.m. Wednesday on Showtime.

The problems start when Arquette opens her mouth for the first time, gushing about her love of music and musicians and stating, "I'm just the interviewer and the fan."

Who knew you could be both?

You can't.

And a quarter into this 100-minute chat-fest, the sight of Arquette in every frame, gripping her handheld camera (which isn't really being used for these finished shots, anyway) with the intensity of Ang Lee, becomes an irritating distraction. Who is this about, Thom Yorke and Macy Gray or the woman who inspired two huge pop hits (Toto's "Rosanna" and Peter Gabriel's "In Your Eyes" for those playing along at home)?

When Arquette gets out of the way and stops spouting such Abdulisms as "Music is such a powerful force," the film is able to glide along with the naturalness of conversation. Say this for her, those insider connections afforded her unhindered access to an impressive roster including:


Joni Mitchell: "I don't think that there's anybody in the business who likes music -- they can make money off an untalented person who looks good"

Tom Petty: "When I look at [rock'n' roll] now, it looks a lot like professional wrestling to me -- they know it's fake but they don't really care"

The Black Eyed Peas' will.i.am: "Hip hop is the new rock'n' roll because the machine favors this now"
Sound jaded? Cynical? Ungrateful?

Maybe a little, but you can't blame these artists for fervently embracing Arquette's forum to spew their legitimate gripes about a business that eats its young and carelessly discards its old which, in the music biz, is anyone older than 40.

While crumbling and indifferent record companies receive the brunt of complaints, video channels don't escape Arquette's camera undented.

"VH1 and MTV turned suddenly from being a musical experience to a theatrical one," said David Crosby. "It became how you looked, which is what put Britney Spears -- who's as deep as a birdbath -- in front of Joni Mitchell."

Hynde blames MTV for "taking the mystery out of it" and snarls in that Chrissie way, "Fashion has destroyed everything I love about rock'n' roll!"

These expressions, well-edited enough to mostly prevent tedium -- although Sting's ruminations are particularly professorial -- are worth the time investment because of their topicality.

Once the documentary turns to balancing relationships and family and arranging priorities, it becomes Celebrity Dr. Phil Club. Stevie Nicks and Deborah Harry explain why they chose career over having children. Yawn. Patti Scialfa rummages around her startlingly normal kitchen and hands hubby Bruce Springsteen over to Arquette via cell phone. Aww. Yawn. Hynde rails about wearing a nursing bra onstage. OK, now we're awake.

[David]

Once the documentary turns to balancing relationships and family and arranging priorities, it becomes Celebrity Dr. Phil Club. Stevie Nicks and Deborah Harry explain why they chose career over having children. Yawn.You go, Melissa Ruggieri. I'm tired of hearing all that ****. Give it a rest, Stevie. Millions of women decide to have kids & not a career. Millions of other women decide to have a career & not kids. Millions of yet more women decide to do both. Do whatever you want -- but stop whining about it.

[jannieC]

You go, Melissa Ruggieri. I'm tired of hearing all that ****. Give it a rest, Stevie. Millions of women decide to have kids & not a career. Millions of other women decide to have a career & not kids. Millions of yet more women decide to do both. Do whatever you want -- but stop whining about it.
Amen. :nod:

[JazmenFlowers]

I agree that the drugs and kids and marriage and all that does get old, but don't forget that's what a lot of interviewers choose to harp on. It's kind of her tale of woe and it can sound repetitive to those of us who hear it constantly, but maybe not to a newer fan or someone who had not heard her talk about it before. Also, I think that it's possible the reason she talks about that issue a lot is because she's trying to convince herself. Sadly, I think she secretly wishes she had.

[David]

I agree that the drugs and kids and marriage and all that does get old, but don't forget that's what a lot of interviewers choose to harp on. It's kind of her tale of woe and it can sound repetitive to those of us who hear it constantly, but maybe not to a newer fan or someone who had not heard her talk about it before. Also, I think that it's possible the reason she talks about that issue a lot is because she's trying to convince herself. Sadly, I think she secretly wishes she had.Yeah, I think she does, too. There's a deep sense of sadness in her about that.

I wonder whether Stevie has ever been in formal therapy.

[JazmenFlowers]

Yeah, I think she does, too. There's a deep sense of sadness in her about that.

I wonder whether Stevie has ever been in formal therapy.
good question. I doubt she has. The thing about that kind of sadness (having experienced it myself) is that she may just think she wishes she had, but doesn't really feel that - the idea of regret is sometimes much stronger than the actual regret...hell, I don't know what I'm trying to say. :rolleyes:

[BTFLCHLD]

id like to know when it will be finally released on dvd :blob2:

[MoonChilde]

id like to know when it will be finally released on dvd :blob2:
Me too!!:blob1: cause I can;t find it listed as showing up here on satellite at all....

[cliffdweller]

"VH1 and MTV turned suddenly from being a musical experience to a theatrical one," said David Crosby.

How sudden are we talking, like the first nanosecond they aired? 'Cause they (especially MTV) were always about theatrics, hence, Music TELEVISON. Remember the first video ever aired on MTV, Video Killed the Radio Star? Says it all Dave.

Sounds like Rosanna's doc is a real wash, eh? Oh well, it'll be cool to see all those artists bitching about the current state of affairs in the music industry, but yeah, we already knew this. It'll be cool to see them and hear them talking nonetheless. She got a stellar line-up. Oh yeah, and I love Chrissie Hynde!!

thanks for posting Livia!

[David]

Oh yeah, and I love Chrissie Hynde!!"Talk of the Town" is one of the greatest songs of the modern pop-rock era.

I wish I had written those words & compiled those chords & composed that vocal line. That is TRUE songwriting, my friend.

[jannieC]

good question. I doubt she has. The thing about that kind of sadness (having experienced it myself) is that she may just think she wishes she had, but doesn't really feel that - the idea of regret is sometimes much stronger than the actual regret...hell, I don't know what I'm trying to say. :rolleyes:
I think that whether you make the decision or whether nature or circumstances makes the decision, it still is something that any person has to come to terms with and it's not easy. Unless you're one of those people who truly don't want children, or don't like them, etc., and I don't think Stevie is like that at all. I've met many people in their 20's and 30's who happily say they do NOT want children, and I think it's great that they don't feel pressured to breed when they know they wouldn't make great parents. But Stevie is in her 50's and almost always seems wistful or sad to me when talking about this. :(

[chiliD]

"Talk of the Town" is one of the greatest songs of the modern pop-rock era.

I wish I had written those words & compiled those chords & composed that vocal line. That is TRUE songwriting, my friend.

What about the alternating time signatures of "Tattooed Love Boys"?

James Honeyman-Scott was one great guitarist...a shame he didn't get to prove it beyond the first Pretenders album.

[Boots]

To state that Stevie is "whining" is unfair. When she speaks of this, it's to bring home the point that the craziness of the rock and roll lifestyle does not always allow for women in the limelight to have kids. Whereas, men - can get away with it more. What is so wrong in telling people this? Sheryl Crowe, Kate Bush, even Chrissie Hynde have either not had kids, waited until they didn't give a damn about the music world to have them - or had kids while they were rocking, but had to deal with it differently than men in this world do.

Rock and roll - especially in the era of Stevie, Joni, Chrissie, Debbie - etc... was and probably still is - a man's world. No - this isn't whining on my part - and yes - you might disagree - but it basically is...a...man's...world.

For a woman - it's hard to be a good mother and a good rocker. To declaim Stevie for stating that she would rather not have kids in her crazy life than be a bad mother by calling her a "whiner", is border-line mysogynist. She not patting herself on the back - or complaining about the situation - she is telling people with romantic notions about the music world - that women - more so than men - have to make some very serious decisions in their personal lives - that men, frankly, do not have to.

[cliffdweller]

"Talk of the Town" is one of the greatest songs of the modern pop-rock era.

I wish I had written those words & compiled those chords & composed that vocal line. That is TRUE songwriting, my friend.


Amen to that. That song is fabulous.

[cliffdweller]

To declaim Stevie for stating that she would rather not have kids in her crazy life than be a bad mother by calling her a "whiner", is border-line mysogynist.

I don't think that's what people are doing. I think they are saying that they're sick of hearing this same old song and dance about "I didn't have kids because I didn't want to compromise my art." You know the speech, they're tired of hearing it because we've all heard this a million times before. I don't think anyone's judging Stevie because she didn't want to have kids, it's just we've heard the reasons already, we get it, talk about something else! Does this make sense? Did I read you correctly?

[SapphireSister]

To this day I will never fully understand why Stevie claims having children would have compromised her art and why she couldn't have done both. Many of the people who do what she does had kids. Cher and Madonna did it and they are probably more famous than Stevie and have very busy careers. Sometimes I wonder if it's just something she keeps telling herself because it just never worked out for her or wasn't meant for her to have kids and part of her really wishes she did so she has to keep telling herself and the media that over and over so she feels better.

On the other hand she could be right. I'm sure if she had kids she would have not have gotten to spend the same amount of time with them as a "normal" mother and maybe she didn't want to make that sacrifce. I know Madonna has a nanny for the kids but they still spend quality time with her but maybe that just wasn't an option for Stevie.

[JazmenFlowers]

I don't think her life and lifestyle and possibly her personality really are suited for children. Just my opinion of course.

[jannieC]

To this day I will never fully understand why Stevie claims having children would have compromised her art and why she couldn't have done both. Many of the people who do what she does had kids. Cher and Madonna did it and they are probably more famous than Stevie and have very busy careers. Sometimes I wonder if it's just something she keeps telling herself because it just never worked out for her or wasn't meant for her to have kids and part of her really wishes she did so she has to keep telling herself and the media that over and over so she feels better.

On the other hand she could be right. I'm sure if she had kids she would have not have gotten to spend the same amount of time with them as a "normal" mother and maybe she didn't want to make that sacrifce. I know Madonna has a nanny for the kids but they still spend quality time with her but maybe that just wasn't an option for Stevie.
Stevie has often said that she wouldn't have wanted her children to be raised by nannies. I absolutely agree that her career would not have survived her being a mother, being the kind of mother she wanted to be. Sure, celebs do it all the time, but they have nannies doing eveything for them. (Don't get me started on <i>that</i>)

[amber]

I don't think Cher or Madonna have toured as much as Stevie. Stevie was always touring. She's still always touring.

[SapphireSister]

Stevie has often said that she wouldn't have wanted her children to be raised by nannies. I absolutely agree that her career would not have survived her being a mother, being the kind of mother she wanted to be. Sure, celebs do it all the time, but they have nannies doing eveything for them. (Don't get me started on <i>that</i>)

But there have to be celebs out there who don't have nannies doing everything. There's a big difference between having a nanny help out with the kids and having the nanny actually raise the kids. My sister-in-law is a super woman and has a crazy career and travels. She has a nanny but the kids aren't raised by the nanny, she is there to help out and even travels with her and the kids. Why couldn't the kids travel with Stevie when they were young? I'm just saying I think the possibility exists that she could have had her career AND had kids not raised by a nanny if she really wanted to as I am sure other celebs have done the same (given I'm sure there are many who's kids ARE raised by nannies which is sickening).

Maybe Stevie wouldn't have been on the road as much or recorded as many albums but she could have done both if she really wanted to. Some of the greatest entertainers ever have had children and I guarantee they were not all raised by other people.

[amber]

She couldn't have really had one until 1986-7 anyways, unless she wanted to have a crack baby. She was already 38 then.
I don't think she really wanted them.

[cliffdweller]

Maybe Stevie just flat never wanted kids :shrug: I mean, if she wanted them badly enough, she would have made it work, she's a resourceful woman. I don't know why she doesn't just come out and say, "Look, I just didn't want kids, okay?" Or, "My career was my baby, and that's all the baby I need." :laugh: Either way, I would respect her for it.

I think the side of her not wanting kids was stronger than the side that did. There may be a bit of wistfulness as Janet said, but in the end I think she's happy with her life and I don't think she'd change a thing. She seems very resolute about being content with the choices she's made in her life.

[SapphireSister]

She couldn't have really had one until 1986-7 anyways, unless she wanted to have a crack baby.

OMFG I love you for that :xoxo: :laugh:

And if she had one after 1987 during the Klonopin years the thing would have been crying for hours and she'd just sit there and stare into space thinking, "Oh no, my baby's crying, poor thing. Maybe I'll have to get up and hold her, hmmm, well, maybe later" *nods out*. :lol:

[SapphireSister]

Maybe Stevie just flat never wanted kids :shrug: I mean, if she wanted them badly enough, she would have made it work, she's a resourceful woman. I don't know why she doesn't just come out and say, "Look, I just didn't want kids, okay?" Or, "My career was my baby, and that's all the baby I need." :laugh:

Exactly! I wish she would just flat out say that she didn't want them instead of saying she couldn't have had a career and kids, that's b.s.. But like you said I respect her either way.

What I'm saying is that maybe part of her really did want them and that's why she's telling the the same b.s. story over and over that she couldn't have them because she is resourceful and could have done both if she really wanted to. Is it possible she's regretting it and feels she needs to make excuses for herself and to the media?

[Livia]

Maybe Stevie just flat never wanted kids :shrug: I mean, if she wanted them badly enough, she would have made it work, she's a resourceful woman. I don't know why she doesn't just come out and say, "Look, I just didn't want kids, okay?" Or, "My career was my baby, and that's all the baby I need." :laugh: Either way, I would respect her for it.

I think the side of her not wanting kids was stronger than the side that did. There may be a bit of wistfulness as Janet said, but in the end I think she's happy with her life and I don't think she'd change a thing. She seems very resolute about being content with the choices she's made in her life.

She depends on her music like a husband....and her doggies and songs are her children. :)

[amber]

OMFG I love you for that :xoxo: :laugh:

And if she had one after 1987 during the Klonopin years the thing would have been crying for hours and she'd just sit there and stare into space thinking, "Oh no, my baby's crying, poor thing. Maybe I'll have to get up and hold her, hmmm, well, maybe later" *nods out*. :lol:

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:


If I had Stevie's career I wouldn't need/want kids either. Or if I was me. Cause I don't want any kids.

[Livia]

OMFG I love you for that :xoxo: :laugh:

And if she had one after 1987 during the Klonopin years the thing would have been crying for hours and she'd just sit there and stare into space thinking, "Oh no, my baby's crying, poor thing. Maybe I'll have to get up and hold her, hmmm, well, maybe later" *nods out*. :lol:

The visual I'm getting on that is hilarious. A la Rooms on Fire video.

[SapphireSister]

The visual I'm getting on that is hilarious. A la Rooms on Fire video.

Yea, I know the scene and I'm going to continue it. She's swinging the baby but then ooops, she drops it cause she's so spaced out! Remember her saying she fell when she was on Klonopin? Awww, sorry Stevie. I'm only playing.

[cliffdweller]

She depends on her music like a husband....and her doggies and songs are her children. :)


I wish I had doggies :(

If I had some, I'm sure I would TOTALLY treat them like they were my children too!

[Kelly]

Maybe Stevie wanted children and there is some other reason she did not have them? The Tower always made me think that was the case. She always sounds wistful and like she is trying to convince people she did not really want or need kids when deep down I think she really did. There was a good ten year period when she talked about stopping her career to have a baby, then talked about adopting and she talked about it alot. Her interview with Annie Nightengale, although edited, certainly indicated there was a time in her life when she did want to be a Mother. I do not think that desire just suddenly goes away or gets replaced by a dog or a song. :confused: No one is saying she had to have kids to be fulfilled, that is personal choice. I personally, just believe Stevie wanted to be a Mother and is not as fulfilled by her writing and songs as she likes to claim. She had her songs in the late 80s and early 90s, yet still nose dived into depression. Something was causing her to be unhappy and her music certainly was not enough then. I do not buy that Stevie is completely fulfilled in life by two Yorkies, her journal and music. That is a huge part of her life and without those things, she might feel sort of empty, however, I think she has always needed other things as well. (people who make her feel normal and accepted for the woman and not the image, love, family, security, etc...things she does not comment on publically as needing_)

[golden braid]

Maybe Stevie wanted children and there is some other reason she did not have them? The Tower always made me think that was the case. She always sounds wistful and like she is trying to convince people she did not really want or need kids when deep down I think she really did. There was a good ten year period when she talked about stopping her career to have a baby, then talked about adopting and she talked about it alot. Her interview with Annie Nightengale, although edited, certainly indicated there was a time in her life when she did want to be a Mother. I do not think that desire just suddenly goes away or gets replaced by a dog or a song. :confused: No one is saying she had to have kids to be fulfilled, that is personal choice. I personally, just believe Stevie wanted to be a Mother and is not as fulfilled by her writing and songs as she likes to claim. She had her songs in the late 80s and early 90s, yet still nose dived into depression. Something was causing her to be unhappy and her music certainly was not enough then. I do not buy that Stevie is completely fulfilled in life by two Yorkies, her journal and music. That is a huge part of her life and without those things, she might feel sort of empty, however, I think she has always needed other things as well. (people who make her feel normal and accepted for the woman and not the image, love, family, security, etc...things she does not comment on publically as needing_)
I totally agree. If she felt content with her life and not having a family, I don't think she would keep bringing it up over and over again. She now mentions Lindsey's kids a lot too and I think deep down it saddens her that she doesn't have her own. At least she has Jessi to keep her busy.