Most Boring Movie You've Ever Seen

[David]

I saw Tarkovsky's "Stalker" back in college, or sort of saw it. I went with two or three dormmates who were all in the Film Studies dep't. I would fall asleep after what seemed like an interminable length of time, wake up, see more movie (it seemed never to end), fall back asleep, &c. This went on repeatedly -- four or six times. I don't even remember getting back to the dorm. It's as if I had been Mickey Finn'd.

Postscript: I'm happy to say, after just watching the Criterion "Andrei Rublev," that I can sit through at least one Tarkovsky flick relatively entertained!

[GateandGarden]

A Walk to Remember

God, that movie was painful. And boring.

Also, Down to You

Teen flicks...booooooo!

[dissention]

Anything from David Lean. His movies make me claw at my eyes. Painful, I tell you.

[GypsySorcerer]

"A Walk in the Clouds" was a real snoozer..........

[golden braid]

Speed 2 and Forces of Nature come to mind.

[SteveMacD]

Ishtar was a snoozer.

[greatdarkwing]

Speed 2 and Forces of Nature come to mind.


I liked Speed 2 :laugh:

The only movie i've ever walked of : Mandy Moore's "How To Deal"

[StevieNicksEO17]

Malibu's Most Wanted... Worst. movie. ever.

[dissention]

Ishtar was a snoozer.

Hell yes. My lovely Elaine May really released a stinker with that one.

Philadelphia with Tom Hanks is another snoozer, what overrated garbage. Just because it dealt with a heavy subject, it doesn't mean it's good, people. Same with Shoah, which I never saw more than three hours of because it was so unwatchable. Bless the poor soul that could stomach the whole thing, you get props from me.

[GateandGarden]

The only movie i've ever walked of : Mandy Moore's "How To Deal"I bet that was bad! :eek:

I thought of another snoozer: Corky Romano

I guess I shouldn't be admitting that I've seen these awful movies. :o

[greatdarkwing]

I bet that was bad! :eek:

I thought of another snoozer: Corky Romano

I guess I shouldn't be admitting that I've seen these awful movies. :o

I liked Corky Romano too!!!! :laugh: :laugh: I guess I just like bad movies :sorry:

[dissention]

I liked Speed 2 :laugh:

I'm mixed when it comes to Sandra Bullock, but her new one Crash looks fab-u-lous.

And let's add Angels In America. PURE SWILL.

[greatdarkwing]

I bet that was bad! :eek:

[/I]



My comment to my friends as I walked out.... "I'd rather go shove a watermelon down my peehole than sit through this movie" :thumbsup:

[greatdarkwing]

I'm mixed when it comes to Sandra Bullock, but her new one Crash looks fab-u-lous.

And let's add Angels In America. PURE SWILL.

Miss Congeniality 2 looked like monkey crap, LOL

[GateandGarden]

My comment to my friends as I walked out.... "I'd rather go shove a watermelon down my peehole than sit through this movie" :thumbsup:I don't think I've ever walked out of a movie and I don't even know why. For some reason I guess I feel like I should stick it out. Totally illogical, but that's what I do. :laugh:

[dissention]

Miss Congeniality 2 looked like monkey crap, LOL

The first one was pleasant fluff, but I gladly passed on the sequel. :D

[CreepingDeath]

Alexander- Colin Farrell and his unibrow disgust me.
Battlefield Earth
Water World
The Blair Witch Project

[dissention]

Alexander- Colin Farrell and his unibrow disgust me.


:thumbsup:

He looks like Jimmy Iovine's lovechild.

[CreepingDeath]

:thumbsup:

He looks like Jimmy Iovine's lovechild.

:nod:

And he looks like he hasn't bathed in several months. Boo!

[golden braid]

The Blair Witch Project
I forgot about The Blair Witch Project. I couldn't even finish it.

[NaiveMelody23]

I have never disliekd a film, like albums lol...but


Darkness wanted to make me kill myself

[Red]

I thought Forrest Gump was absolute garbage and I'm pretty much alone on this one. What's the appeal?

[greatdarkwing]

I thought Forrest Gump was absolute garbage and I'm pretty much alone on this one. What's the appeal?

Luitenant Dan!!! :laugh:

[dissention]

I thought Forrest Gump was absolute garbage and I'm pretty much alone on this one. What's the appeal?

It is garbage. As are most Tom Hanks movies. I think the only ones I've liked were Road To Perdition (Jude Law was so gross in it :laugh: ) and Joe Versus the Volcano.

[CreepingDeath]

I thought Forrest Gump was absolute garbage and I'm pretty much alone on this one. What's the appeal?

I thought Forest Gump was crap. Tom Hanks grates on my nerves big time. Which reminds me, I didn't like Castaway either.

[NaiveMelody23]

I thought Forest Gump was crap. Tom Hanks grates on my nerves big time. Which reminds me, I didn't like Castaway either.


I loved Forrest Gump, but different tale, but thank you Creepingdeath. Castaway has to be the most dull film ever. I mean 40 minutews of the film was with him and that stupid beachball..talking

[Red]

Oh my God, this is the first time I've witnessed so much unity on the Gump front! Worst movie evah!!

[Miss Vicky]

Anyone seen "Spartan," that horrid hostage drama starring Val Kilmer? It was so utterly awful that by the time it was over you were glad the stupid girl got kidnapped and were praying for all the characters to get killed in the end as retribution for such an awful movie and to (hopefully) dash any possibility for a sequel. I highly reccomend it as a method of torture for your enemies. Just strap 'em to a chair and tape open their eyelids a la "Clockwork Orange."

[amber]

Oh my God, this is the first time I've witnessed so much unity on the Gump front! Worst movie evah!!
I liked it when I watched it. :sorry: I think I liked all the history stuff. I wouldn't watch it again on purpose, though.

[skcin]

Anyone seen "Spartan," that horrid hostage drama starring Val Kilmer? It was so utterly awful that by the time it was over you were glad the stupid girl got kidnapped and were praying for all the characters to get killed in the end as retribution for such an awful movie and to (hopefully) dash any possibility for a sequel. I highly reccomend it as a method of torture for your enemies. Just strap 'em to a chair and tape open their eyelids a la "Clockwork Orange."


I hated Clockwork Orange. There. I said it.

[Miss Vicky]

I hated Clockwork Orange. There. I said it.

I hate that movie too, but I hate Spartan more.

[DownOnRodeo]

I see <i>Clockwork Orange</i> has been mentioned - that one really did bore and perplex me, but not even half as much as <i>2001: A Space Odyssey</i> (no fault of the brilliant Arthur C Clarke).

[GypsySorcerer]

I admit to watching Miss Congeniality 2. :laugh: It was silly, but mildy entertaining. :cool:

[Hawkeye]

Lost in Translation

[SteveMacD]

It is garbage. As are most Tom Hanks movies. I think the only ones I've liked were Road To Perdition (Jude Law was so gross in it :laugh: ) and Joe Versus the Volcano.
What, "Bachelor Party" get's no respect??? :shrug:

[Serrart]

This is an endless list... just 10... ok 15 :p , not in order except the first:
The English Patient
Pearl Harbor
Saving Private Ryan after the first thirty minutes
Dr T And The Women
The Beach
Dances With The Wolves
The Postman
Dying Young
Crash (the one by Cronenberg)
Troy
The Mexican
Meet Joe Black (sorry Tony!)
Vanilla Sky
Sabrina (remake)
Captain Corelli's Mandolin/Leaving Las Vegas (except for the scenes with Elisabeth Shue)

Romy

[Serrart]

I don't think I've ever walked out of a movie and I don't even know why. For some reason I guess I feel like I should stick it out. Totally illogical, but that's what I do. :laugh:


I've never walked out of a movie either, I find fair to see all of a movie, even if I didn't like it from the opening credits. :shrug:

Romy

[hayley]

I've never walked out of a movie either, I find fair to see all of a movie, even if I didn't like it from the opening credits. :shrug:

Romy
I've walked out of two movies in my life, and both were when I was a kid. One was Kazaam, with Shaquille O'Neal. My mom won radio passes for a screening, so she took me and my brother. Paul Michael Glaser directed it. I can't help but wonder if even an iota of his motivation in his absolutely fantastic charity work comes from guilt for inflicting that piece of **** onto the world. The other one was Fantasia, when it was released when I was a kid. Mom took my brother Josh and I, and we were so completely bored. Maybe about halfway through, we left. Decided that if it was wrong to be completely bored by such a classic, that we didn't want to be right.

I don't like all the Mandy Moore hate around here. I love her, from the good (Saved!) to the bad (A Walk to Remember!) to the ugly (Chasing Liberty & How to Deal!).

I was bored out of my mind by Gladiator, and Troy.

[GateandGarden]

I don't like all the Mandy Moore hate around here. I love her, from the good (Saved!) to the bad (A Walk to Remember!) to the ugly (Chasing Liberty & How to Deal!).I like what I know about Mandy Moore as a person, but I really despise A Walk to Remember. But I've been told by many that I should see Saved! Quite a few of my friends say it's a great movie. I'm also really fond of her self-titled album.

[amber]

I don't like all the Mandy Moore hate around here. I love her, from the good (Saved!) to the bad (A Walk to Remember!) to the ugly (Chasing Liberty & How to Deal!).

I was bored out of my mind by Gladiator, and Troy.
You know, i agree. I didn't know much, but dismissed her out of hand, until I saw Saved. Girl is a good actress! Much respect was transferred from me to her, when I saw that. :nod: :thumbsup: I thought - "well! I wouldn't mind seeing her in more roles!"

[macmar71]

Groundhog's Day
Leap of Faith
Magnolia

[NaiveMelody23]

Elephant

dull

[Miss Vicky]

I don't like all the Mandy Moore hate around here. I love her, from the good (Saved!) to the bad (A Walk to Remember!) to the ugly (Chasing Liberty & How to Deal!).

I was bored out of my mind by Gladiator, and Troy.


You were bored by Gladiator?????????????????????????????
Troy, I could maybe understand - though Eric Bana was too damn yummy... but Gladiator???? I'm shocked. (But then again, I saw the movie five times in the theater, own the dvd, own the vhs, own the book adaptation, and have a huge poster on my wall, so I'm a little biased.)

P.S.
Along the same lines, I just saw Ridley Scott's new epic "Kingdom of Heaven." It was good, but any potential to be great was dashed by the casting of ****bait, err, Orlando Bloom in the lead role. To paraphrase one reviewer, the actor who spent the movie in a mask (one of the characters was a leper so had to wear a mask to hide his disfigurement) expressed greater emotion than Orlando Bloom.

[Miss Vicky]

Groundhog's Day
Leap of Faith
Magnolia

Umm.. I like Groundhog's Day and I love Leap of Faith. Never seen Magnolia.

[GateandGarden]

It was good, but any potential to be great was dashed by the casting of ****bait, err, Orlando Bloom in the lead role. To paraphrase one reviewer, the actor who spent the movie in a mask (one of the characters was a leper so had to wear a mask to hide his disfigurement) expressed greater emotion than Orlando Bloom.But Orlando's so hot! :lol: :shrug: :laugh:

[hayley]

You were bored by Gladiator?????????????????????????????
Troy, I could maybe understand - though Eric Bana was too damn yummy... but Gladiator???? I'm shocked. (But then again, I saw the movie five times in the theater, own the dvd, own the vhs, own the book adaptation, and have a huge poster on my wall, so I'm a little biased.)

P.S.
Along the same lines, I just saw Ridley Scott's new epic "Kingdom of Heaven." It was good, but any potential to be great was dashed by the casting of ****bait, err, Orlando Bloom in the lead role. To paraphrase one reviewer, the actor who spent the movie in a mask (one of the characters was a leper so had to wear a mask to hide his disfigurement) expressed greater emotion than Orlando Bloom.
I hate Gladiator. It was OKAY as like summer movie epic material, but then when they had to go call it the greatest film of the year? I don't think so. I don't like Russell Crowe, and I think Ridley Scott's epics are overblown.

And wasn't the actor in the mask Edward Norton? (I haven't seen it yet, so I don't know if that's spoilery. I read it in a review) Orlando Bloom certainly sucks, but Edward Norton's torso minus legs, arms, and a head could out-act him and the majority of his colleagues.

[GypsySorcerer]

Magnolia


I'm not too fond of that one. I did like the opening sequence, though.

[MacMan]

Well the most recent piece of crap I saw was "Oceans 12". Made no sense... What a waste of a great cast!!

Oh... and "Envy" sucked too, although I think Jack Black is a funny guy.

[CreepingDeath]

All this talk about Eric Bana reminded me of another really boring one: Hulk.

He's hot though, so I'll forgive him. The same goes for Orlando Bloom in Kingdom of Heaven. :p

[ontheEdgeof17]

The Cider House Rules
Rules of Attraction

[NaiveMelody23]

Word, and:

Word, but I think there was a method to the madness of Elephant. It was horrendously boring, but I think there was a reason why. I don't want to spoil it all for anyone, though, so I won't explain it.

I agree, but I just think they could've carried the message a little bit better. Maybe the director intended it on being just a droner.

[Miss Vicky]

He does scrub up nicely but it's so weird that you talk of him like that. He started out here as a local comedian on some ****ty sketch show, so Hollywood 'hunk' is a step in different direction. I was just watching an earlier film that he appeared in, an Australian comedy called The Castle. He's a comedian, you never would have picked him and his wog Australia accent to end up where he did. Mind you, you only have to watch his performance in the film Chopper to understand, not so much the attractive quality (you mightn't think so highly of his appearance after that one), but the acting ability. You should also watch that one if you like seeing people's ears being cut off or just generally being stabbed in the head.

Eric Bana on a sketch comedy show? Wow. That's not what I expected. 'Course I don't really know anything about him or had even heard of him until Troy.
As for not thinking so highly of his appearance... well, let's of hot actors get ugly for certain roles, but I like them anyways. Russell Crowe got fat and gray-haired for The Insider, but I'd still do him. ;) Though his umm, attitude problem has started to kill my attraction to him. Joaquin Phoenix has love handles in "Ladder 49" and a full beard in "Hotel Rowanda" but I'd jump his bones anyday. But I'm starting to ramble, so uh, yeah, I'll stop now. :sorry:

[GateandGarden]

All this talk about Eric Bana reminded me of another really boring one: Hulk.OMG. Worst. Comic book-based. Movie. Evah. :eek:

[ontheEdgeof17]

OMG. Worst. Comic book-based. Movie. Evah. :eek:



Heard of DareDevil? :shocked:

[GateandGarden]

Heard of DareDevil? :shocked:Oh wait. Haven't seen that one. :laugh:

[ontheEdgeof17]

Oh wait. Haven't seen that one. :laugh:


Consider yourself one lucky Lesbian. :p


Elecktra (the spin-off) was actually really good, though.

[GateandGarden]

Consider yourself one lucky Lesbian. :p :laugh: :xoxo:

At least our homos vs breeders poll showed that I'm not really the token lesbo around here! :lol:

[GateandGarden]

I only saw about 5 minutes of the film The Hulk but in those minutes were far more interesting than the entire Spiderman film. I think Ang Lee is brilliant and I wouldn't just write it off as a stupid film like Spiderman or Dare Devil without addressing it's originality. Still, I haven't actually seen it.You have to watch the whole thing. It was atrocious. Truly one of the worst things I've ever seen. I wish I'd walked out. And it really made me dislike Jennifer Connelly.

[Serrart]

Yeah, before all of this he was a comedian known for impersonating our television presenters. He had his own show for about two nights and like everyone else's it was axed, never would have picked a Hollywood career for him. But after all this comedy, out of the blue he turned on a performance in this film 'Chopper'.

I only saw about 5 minutes of the film The Hulk but in those minutes were far more interesting than the entire Spiderman film. I think Ang Lee is brilliant and I wouldn't just write it off as a stupid film like Spiderman or Dare Devil without addressing it's originality. Still, I haven't actually seen it.

I'm always partial about Ang Lee, but I liked Hulk. He kept the comics dimension (especially with the green man visual aspect or the erm... Hulk dogs) filling it with overly deep characters. IMO, it came out as a conscious (or more likely unconscious) satire of movies like Spiderman or Xmen, where the directors are looking in the neatest way possible for the schizophrenic hollywoodian balance between those aspects. Moreover the father-son relationship between Bana and a quite disconcerting Nolte goes on the Elizabethan side: it's fun.

As for Elephant, I thought it was brilliant. The pace was the entire point of the film! I was mesmerised by every shot and never found myself bored but I can see why would want it to hurry up. The film played like real life for the effect and......oh that reminds me, I had a copy of that until I leant it to someone, must get that back.

I like it a lot too. No messages, just life and time running by. Very scary for its truthfulness, it totally deserved to win Cannes over the melodramatic Dogville (wich I liked too, by the way).

Romy

[NaiveMelody23]

Eh. I don't know. The message definitely could have been carried better, but I think that part of the message lies in the slow pace. :shrug:


Maybe, I guess we will truly never know :shrug:

[cliffdweller]

My friends FORCED me to watch Dodgeball with them this weekend...UGH!! This movie SUCKS!! Ben Stiller was hilarious of course, but the movie was so totally assanine I couldn't stand it. I know it's supposed to be irreverant and silly, but this is was just throwing any and every gag against the wall to see if it stuck--and not much did imo. I was bored to tears. BORED I TELL YOU!! And it was a comedy!! And I love silly comedy but this movie was totally useless.

[cliffdweller]

It is garbage. As are most Tom Hanks movies. I think the only ones I've liked were Road To Perdition (Jude Law was so gross in it :laugh: ) and Joe Versus the Volcano.

Jude Law was so damned creepy! He was great. Good film.

As far as Tom Hanks movies go, I like his earlier work in Bachelor Party. :laugh: :laugh:

But seriously, I will always have a soft spot in my heart for Splash.

[DrummerDeanna]

Jude Law was so damned creepy! He was great. Good film.

As far as Tom Hanks movies go, I like his earlier work in Bachelor Party. :laugh: :laugh:

But seriously, I will always have a soft spot in my heart for Splash.


Splash is AWESOME :laugh:

AND I? LOVE Tom Hanks!

Forrest Gump is a great movie!!! I own it and watch it often lol....well not often - but I was saddened by the Forrest Gump hate...

And HIllary -you should totally see Saved - it's great :nod:

[Miss Vicky]

AND I? LOVE Tom Hanks!

Forrest Gump is a great movie!!! I own it and watch it often lol....well not often - but I was saddened by the Forrest Gump hate...



Glad I'm not the only one who likes him! (Though Cast Away was a snoozer and I wasn't thrilled with You've Got Mail or Saving Private Ryan) Loved Forrest Gump, Philadelphia, A League of Their Own, Sleepless in Seattle, Big, The Green Mile, Turner and Hooch, and The Burbs.

[DrummerDeanna]

Glad I'm not the only one who likes him! (Though Cast Away was a snoozer and I wasn't thrilled with You've Got Mail or Saving Private Ryan) Loved Forrest Gump, Philadelphia, A League of Their Own, Sleepless in Seattle, Big, The Green Mile, Turner and Hooch, and The Burbs.


I didn't see Castaway...

I LOVE You've Got Mail though lol....

as well as the others you mentioned....A League of Their Own is actually one of my favorite movies ever!!

And I forgot about Turner and Hooch lol...love that one too :nod:

[GateandGarden]

And HIllary -you should totally see Saved - it's great :nod:Will do. :nod:

[GypsySorcerer]

My friends FORCED me to watch Dodgeball with them this weekend...UGH!! This movie SUCKS!! Ben Stiller was hilarious of course, but the movie was so totally assanine I couldn't stand it. I know it's supposed to be irreverant and silly, but this is was just throwing any and every gag against the wall to see if it stuck--and not much did imo. I was bored to tears. BORED I TELL YOU!! And it was a comedy!! And I love silly comedy but this movie was totally useless.


Oh, I loved Dodgeball. The appearance by Lance Armstrong was one of the best cameos I've seen in a while.

[GypsySorcerer]

I need to add "The Legend of Bagger Vance." ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

[mylittledemon]

Bridges of Madison County.

[dissention]

This is an endless list... just 10... ok 15 :p , not in order except the first:
The English Patient
Pearl Harbor
Saving Private Ryan after the first thirty minutes
Dr T And The Women
The Beach
Dances With The Wolves
The Postman
Dying Young
Crash (the one by Cronenberg)
Troy
The Mexican
Meet Joe Black (sorry Tony!)
Vanilla Sky
Sabrina (remake)
Captain Corelli's Mandolin/Leaving Las Vegas (except for the scenes with Elisabeth Shue)

Romy

I agree with EVERY one of those. But Crash was quite entertaining...and so incredibly awful.

Dr. T and the Women was unwatchable. One of Altman's worst (and he's had many stinkers).

[dissention]

The Cider House Rules

I was an extra in that. But never watched the movie. :laugh:

Rules of Attraction

WORD. What a horrendous, horrendous, horrendous movie. One of the worst I've ever seen.

[dissention]

Eh. I don't know. The message definitely could have been carried better, but I think that part of the message lies in the slow pace. :shrug:

Gus Van Sant is a hack, no matter how you slice it. He's yet to make a decent flick. Even Drugstore Cowboy was pretty ****ty, in my opinion. How Elephant sweeped up at Cannes is a ****ing mystery to me. It's not a bad movie, but considering what it was competing with, I'm still stunned.

[dissention]

I like it a lot too. No messages, just life and time running by. Very scary for its truthfulness, it totally deserved to win Cannes over the melodramatic Dogville (wich I liked too, by the way).

Oy. Dogville blows Elephant out of the water and I'm still amazed that Von Trier got nothing from it at Cannes (though it's quite hilarious to read the reviews from American critics, the ultimate hacks). But I suppose I'm partial to it because it's one of my favorite movies of all time. It beat you over the head with it's message and then shoved it down your throat for good measure, yet was completely honest and up-front about doing so. Melodrama and pretentiousness at its finest and most compelling. Absolutely love it. :laugh: I'm still trying to get my hands on a copy of Dogville Confessions, dammit. The Korean import DVD I have only has a 15-minute portion of it and I'm salivating to see the rest of it.

Have you seen the trailer for Manderlay? I can't wait to read the reviews for that sucker, it's going to be SAVAGED here in the States.

[Serrart]

Oy. Dogville blows Elephant out of the water and I'm still amazed that Von Trier got nothing from it at Cannes (though it's quite hilarious to read the reviews from American critics, the ultimate hacks). But I suppose I'm partial to it because it's one of my favorite movies of all time. It beat you over the head with it's message and then shoved it down your throat for good measure, yet was completely honest and up-front about doing so. Melodrama and pretentiousness at its finest and most compelling. Absolutely love it. :laugh: I'm still trying to get my hands on a copy of Dogville Confessions, dammit. The Korean import DVD I have only has a 15-minute portion of it and I'm salivating to see the rest of it.

Have you seen the trailer for Manderlay? I can't wait to read the reviews for that sucker, it's going to be SAVAGED here in the States.

IMO, the reason why Von Trier didn't get anything at Cannes for Dogville was the fact that he had won the Golden Palm two years before for Dancer In The Dark, it was so soon. This year he has big chances to win again. I haven't yet seen Manderlay trailer (off to look for it now :nod: ) but it sounds great from what I've heard. For now, from the reviews I've read, the movies that show a big potential as competitors are Cache by Michael Haneke, with Daniel Auteil and Juliette Binoche and eventually Where The Truth Lies by Egoyan (but the huge amount of sex could be a bit too much to handle for some in the jury, even if I think Firth and Bacon are favourites for the actors' award), while The Last days by Gus Van Sant looks to be nothing special. Even if Michael Pitt is up to win the prize for 'the most dazed and confused actor in a press conference', I think. :nod:

Romy

[dissention]

IMO, the reason why Von Trier didn't get anything at Cannes for Dogville was the fact that he had won the Golden Palm two years before for Dancer In The Dark, it was so soon. This year he has big chances to win again. I haven't yet seen Manderlay trailer (off to look for it now :nod: ) but it sounds great from what I've heard. For now, from the reviews I've read, the movies that show a big potential as competitors are Cache by Michael Haneke, with Daniel Auteil and Juliette Binoche and eventually Where The Truth Lies by Egoyan (but the huge amount of sex could be a bit too much to handle for some in the jury, even if I think Firth and Bacon are favourites for the actors' award), while The Last days by Gus Van Sant looks to be nothing special. Even if Michael Pitt is up to win the prize for 'the most dazed and confused actor in a press conference', I think. :nod:

Romy

Dancer In the Dark is a mixed bag for me. Bjork is phenomenal, but Von Trier makes it too gimmicky at times. The last musical scene was pretty wretched, imo. I do like it, though. I'd KILL to see the behind-the-scenes footage that's floating around, especially the footage of Bjork getting mad at Von Trier and cutting her dress to pieces and eating it.

From what I've heard, Lemming with Charlotte Rampling is the favorite to win. All the reviews I've read have said that it's magnificent. Cronenberg's new one looks interesting, I'd like to see that one, and I *love* Egoyan, so I can't wait to see Where the Truth Lies. I've read that American distributors are essentially ignoring it, though.

The trailer for Manderlay is quite racy itself, there's no way that they'll be using it for American publicity. I'm dying to see it. Lauren Bacall said that they weren't going to shoot Manderlay until 2007, though, but Kidman is rumoured to be returning, so I can definitely wait. Her new independent biopic on Diane Arbus certainly looks like a winner and it's supposed to be quite out-there.

[Serrart]

Dancer In the Dark is a mixed bag for me. Bjork is phenomenal, but Von Trier makes it too gimmicky at times. The last musical scene was pretty wretched, imo. I do like it, though. I'd KILL to see the behind-the-scenes footage that's floating around, especially the footage of Bjork getting mad at Von Trier and cutting her dress to pieces and eating it.

From what I've heard, Lemming with Charlotte Rampling is the favorite to win. All the reviews I've read have said that it's magnificent. Cronenberg's new one looks interesting, I'd like to see that one, and I *love* Egoyan, so I can't wait to see Where the Truth Lies. I've read that American distributors are essentially ignoring it, though.

The trailer for Manderlay is quite racy itself, there's no way that they'll be using it for American publicity. I'm dying to see it. Lauren Bacall said that they weren't going to shoot Manderlay until 2007, though, but Kidman is rumoured to be returning, so I can definitely wait. Her new independent biopic on Diane Arbus certainly looks like a winner and it's supposed to be quite out-there.

I have mixed feelings for Dancer In The Dark too, but Bjork's performance was totally worth of the Golden Palm so I was happy it won. I have to say the Manderlay trailer is fantastic (I especially love Defoe's shot), even if it would give to Roger Ebert a heart attack ;). I also think they would mellow it a bit for American market. About Lemming, it sounds good, but I don't think it would be in the final race for the Golden Palm; Rampling seems in a good position for the Actress' award (and it would be just great because I think she's one of the best living actresses around) even if Ms Howard would be a very credited competitor, I imagine, Von Trier takes out always the best from his actors. I hope Kidman will return, but to work with the Danish guy is a very engaging and risky task... she'll have to reschedule a lot, to do it, I guess.

Romy

[NaiveMelody23]

the truman show.

i really hate that film

[cliffdweller]

From what I've heard, Lemming with Charlotte Rampling is the favorite to win. All the reviews I've read have said that it's magnificent. Cronenberg's new one looks interesting, I'd like to see that one, and I *love* Egoyan, so I can't wait to see Where the Truth Lies. I've read that American distributors are essentially ignoring it, though.

The trailer for Manderlay is quite racy itself, there's no way that they'll be using it for American publicity. I'm dying to see it. Lauren Bacall said that they weren't going to shoot Manderlay until 2007, though, but Kidman is rumoured to be returning, so I can definitely wait. Her new independent biopic on Diane Arbus certainly looks like a winner and it's supposed to be quite out-there.

uh...I am excited by all of this.

Okay, done. :laugh:

[dissention]

uh...I am excited by all of this.

Okay, done. :laugh:

What a coincidence. Me, too. :laugh:

I've read a few articles about the Diane Arbus movie (called "Fur") with Kidman and it's supposed to be ****ing weird. Takes place 15 years before she killed herself at the height of her "freaks" obsession. Robert Downey Jr. is in it as some weird freak that she dreams about every night that tells her what and how to photograph. :laugh:

[cliffdweller]

What a coincidence. Me, too. :laugh:

I've read a few articles about the Diane Arbus movie (called "Fur") with Kidman and it's supposed to be ****ing weird. Takes place 15 years before she killed herself at the height of her "freaks" obsession. Robert Downey Jr. is in it as some weird freak that she dreams about every night that tells her what and how to photograph. :laugh:

Oh my, Robert Downey Jr. in a freak role? How WILL he pull that off? :laugh: Sounds interesting.

I am so completely psyched that Nicole might be reprising her role as Grace in Manderlay. I mean seriously, you have REALLY made my day Diss.

[dissention]

Oh my, Robert Downey Jr. in a freak role? How WILL he pull that off? :laugh: Sounds interesting.

I am so completely psyched that Nicole might be reprising her role as Grace in Manderlay. I mean seriously, you have REALLY made my day Diss.

Eek, my mistake, it's not Manderlay, it's the last one, Washington. :) Manderlay comes out this summer and I? Am psyched. The trailer's online if you want to check it out, it looks even more risque than Dogville was. Why Kidman would want to go back and work with that nut is a mystery to my ass, but I'll certainly enjoy it. I'll see if I can find the article where she says she's making it with him.

[cliffdweller]

Why Kidman would want to go back and work with that nut is a mystery to my ass

Agreed. Lars Von Trier is a ridiculous ass. I don't know why ANYONE would want to work with him. Aside from the fact that he is a brilliant filmmaker, there is no incentive. He puts his actors through the emotional wringer in a very disturbing way.

[dissention]

Agreed. Lars Von Trier is a ridiculous ass. I don't know why ANYONE would want to work with him. Aside from the fact that he is a brilliant filmmaker, there is no incentive. He puts his actors through the emotional wringer in a very disturbing way.

I liked what Bjork said about him and how he hates women. She said that he's a brilliant man who can't put forth his brilliance on film without a lot of help from women and he resents that, so he abuses them and treats them like **** so that he doesn't feel somehow inferior to the women that he needs for his vision to come alive. Of course, this is coming from a women who got so mad at him that she cut her dress into tiny pieces and ate them, but she has worked with him. :laugh:

[dissention]

Here's a new review for Manderlay, one of the first I've seen. I read one from the Hollywood Reporter that attacked it for the same old anti-American bull**** that they seem to search for in every one of his movies, but I can't seem to find it right now.

http://www.variety.com/index.asp?layout=cannes2005&content=review&reviewid=VE1117927128&categoryId=1724

Self-appointed American history professor Lars von Trier has come up with another barbed allegorical lecture about the ugliness of the U.S. legacy in "Manderlay." Second installment in the Danish helmer's "USA" trilogy employs the same bare-bones, stage bound aesthetic approach as "Dogville," and is actually a leaner, better constructed and 40-minutes shorter picture than its predecessor. The subject being race relations, "Manderlay" is bound to stir considerable debate in intellectual circles, but given the director's abstract style and use of characters to enact an agenda, it's a discussion that will exclude the general public, who will ignore it as they did "Dogville."

Those prepared by the earlier film to know where the writer-director is coming from will hardly be startled by his polemical provocations this time around. In fact, most of his points about slavery and its ramifications are entirely plausible and have cleverly been shaped in the scenario to further his arguments about the persistence of deep-seeded racial attitudes.

But arguments are what they are and what the film is designed to create, given the let-me-tell-you-how-it-is tone and tunnel focus of the drama.

Just as von Trier was inspired by "The Threepenny Opera" for "Dogville," he has again Americanized a foreign story to serve his purposes. Source this time is, of all things, the notorious French tome "Histoire d'O," preface to which is entitled "Happiness in Slavery." Work recounts a story from Barbados in which some black slaves, freed by law in 1838, asked their former master to take them back. When he refused, they killed him and his family, then moved back into their old quarters and resumed their work as before.

Visually witty opening depicts a lined map of the United States being traversed by what look like toys that turn into the cars carrying the gangster entourage from "Dogville" away from Colorado and into Alabama. It's still 1933, but Grace this time is no longer played by Nicole Kidman but by the considerably younger Bryce Dallas Howard, while James Caan has been replaced as her father by comparatively more youthful Willem Dafoe.

Pausing for a break outside the gates of an old plantation called Manderlay, they encounter the bedraggled residents of the compound, where slavery has continued in force for the nearly 70 years since the end of the Civil War.

Warned by her father to stay out of what he calls "a local matter," the outraged Grace feels compelled to correct the injustice, sticking around after the death of matriarch Mam (Lauren Bacall) to restructure the society by freeing the blacks and consigning the surviving whites to hard labor and, in a caustic scene, having them serve a meal in blackface.

Script's most intriguing conceit, especially with the Iraq experiment looming as the unmentioned backdrop, spins on the question of whether people can be force-fed democracy and be expected to practice it if they've not been prepared to do so. Seeing that the former slaves show no initiative to fix up their shacks or plant cotton at the proper time, Grace takes matters in hand by leading seminars on democracy and designates simple majority votes to arbitrate community decisions .

Despite setbacks such as a devastating dust storm (beautifully rendered under the self-imposed constrictions), Manderlay eventually thrives under Grace's guidance, and after a record cotton harvest, she proclaims her students "graduate Americans."

But, this being a von Trier film, good times can't last for more than a moment. Troubling incidents for Grace start with the group's vote to condemn to death an old woman charged with causing a sickly little girl to die by stealing her food; after arguing against the sentence, Grace insists upon carrying out the execution herself.

Then there is Grace's intensely dicey relationship with Timothy (Isaach de Bankole), a so-called "proudly nigger" in the group's pecking order. Distrustful and hostile from the beginning, Timothy has also been the source of increasing sensual tension in Grace. Edgy relationship climaxes in an extremely ambiguous scene that suggests aspects of a quasi-rape but proceeds nonetheless with Grace's passive complicity.

Unsurprisingly, however, the act carries dire consequences. As in "Dogville," Grace's father returns at the end but, as before, it is Grace who wields (literally) the whip hand with the same mercilessness she exhibited last time around.

Due to the moderately more lively dramatization of the issues, better pacing and a more cohesive group of characters, "Manderlay" is less tedious than "Dogville," even if it can be equally headache inducing to those not attuned to von Trier's giggly camera style. Those eager to lap up what the Dogmatic one has to say will readily do so.

But the problem for others is the incessantly felt presence of a puppet master pulling strings to make his ideological points, and employing several techniques guaranteed to distance all but the preconverted: Baroque music, chapter headings that keep reminding how long the road ahead remains, very British narration by John Hurt in sardonically omniscient "Barry Lyndon" mode and spare sets that use a fence here, some columns there and a few other objects to augment black marks on the floor designed to outline the plantation.

Taking over for Kidman, who all but transcended her surroundings in "Dogville," Howard, like Grace herself, gradually comes into her own in a role with a schoolteacherish side that would seem to substantially reflect the director himself. With minimal dialogue, de Bankole conveys a smoldering, powerful presence, and Dafoe invests his well-groomed mobster with welcome wry humor.

Most equivocal character in the piece is the former "house slave," Wilhelm, played by Danny Glover. Wilhelm is the man most complicit in the continuation of slavery at Manderlay over the decades as "the lesser of two evils," the author of the hierarchy among blacks and the one who declares that it was "too soon" for his people to make decisions for themselves. Thesp puts the character over with firm and quiet control.

Among the many supporting thesps, Zeljko Ivanek makes a striking impression as an itinerant gambler employed by whites to cheat blacks out of their savings. Returnees from "Dogville" such as Chloe Sevigny and Jeremy Davies have next to nothing to do here.

Von Trier does a minor variation on his "Dogville" ploy, running final credits over photos of racist oppression and violence in the U.S. to the accompaniment of David Bowie's "Young Americans."

In Cannes, von Trier announced that he has postponed the final installment of the trilogy, "Washington," intended to be set in the nation's capital during the '40s, saying he needs to wait because "I'm not mature enough" to make it now.

Camera (color, widescreen), Anthony Dod Mantle; editor, Molly Malene Stensgaard; art director, Peter Grant; set decorator, Simone Grau; costume designer, Manon Rasmussen; sound (Dolby Digital), Ad Stoop, Marten Negenman; sound designers, Kristian Eidnes Anderesen, Per Streit; light designer, Asa Frankenberg; visual effects supervisor, Peter Hjorth; line producer, Signe Jensen; assistant director, Mike Elliott; casting, Avy Kaufman (U.S.), Joyce Nettles (U.K.). Reviewed at Cannes Film Festival (competing), May 16, 2005. Running time: 139 MIN.

[Serrart]

Here's a new review for Manderlay, one of the first I've seen. I read one from the Hollywood Reporter that attacked it for the same old anti-American bull**** that they seem to search for in every one of his movies, but I can't seem to find it right now.

Manderlay won't win, I think: critics liked it but I haven't found in the reviews the same kind of enthusiasm that some had for Dogville. Selfishly I'm glad because this year I'm all for Haneke, Egoyan and Hou Hsiao Hsien (and his movie hasn't been shown yet, but he's an all time favourite for me). Plus I hope Kevin Bacon and Colin Firth would win the actors' award, Bacon is a fantastic, underrated actor, IMO.

Romy

[dissention]

Manderlay won't win, I think: critics liked it but I haven't found in the reviews the same kind of enthusiasm that some had for Dogville. Selfishly I'm glad because this year I'm all for Haneke, Egoyan and Hou Hsiao Hsien (and his movie hasn't been shown yet, but he's an all time favourite for me). Plus I hope Kevin Bacon and Colin Firth would win the actors' award, Bacon is a fantastic, underrated actor, IMO.

Romy

I don't think it'll win, either, there's too much ambivalence towards him. But now that I've read more of the plot, I'm PSYCHED to see it. Gawd, that man is brilliant. :laugh:

[Serrart]

I don't think it'll win, either, there's too much ambivalence towards him. But now that I've read more of the plot, I'm PSYCHED to see it. Gawd, that man is brilliant. :laugh:

I'm anxious to see it too. I almost like the plot more than the first one, and I'm looking forward to see Bacall playing Mam and Ms Howard in the role of Grace, even of I'll miss the Australian girl, I guess. :nod:

Romy

[dissention]

I'm anxious to see it too. I almost like the plot more than the first one, and I'm looking forward to see Bacall playing Mam and Ms Howard in the role of Grace, even of I'll miss the Australian girl, I guess. :nod:

Romy

Agreed. :nod: I'm anxious to see the ending of all things, it should be quite jaw-dropping. The ending of Dogville still ranks up there as one of the most shocking things I've ever seen on film. I simply can't get over the brutality and out-of-left-field nature of it; it's quite stunning and marvelously done.