Criticism: Judging the Body

[David]

What do you think of the occasional propensity of some critics to attack the physical shortcomings & physiognomy of actors & actresses?

John Simon, one of the greatest critics of the modern era, is the emperor of personal insults, some say. Simon's detractors say he channels Noel Coward telling Mrs. Worthington what he really thought of her would-be-actress daughter.

Herewith some of Simon's physical descriptions of actresses (even those whose ability he admired):

Diana Rigg "has a way of protruding her face like a Ping-Pong paddle, while grinning vapidly or bursting into a whinnying laugh."

Angela Lansbury lets "her eyes go either bulgily whirling . . . or so narrowly slitty that you couldn't slip a calling card through their openings."

Maggie Smith looks "like an upstart rooster."

On Liza Minnelli: "The nose always en route to becoming a trunk, blubber lips unable to resist the pull of gravity, & a chin trying its damnedest to withdraw into the neck."

On Shelley Duvall: "The worst & most homeliest thing to hit the screens since Liza Minnelli."

On Barbra Streisand: "A cross between an aardvark & an albino rat surmounted by a platinum-coated horse bun. ... Her acting consists entirely of fishily thrusting out her lips, sounding like a cabbie bellyaching at breakneck speed, & throwing her weight around."

Walter Matthau looked "like a half-melted rubber bulldog."

On Josh Mostel: "Young Mr. Mostel, who manages the difficult feat of reaching the grotesque while totally bypassing the funny, has not inherited any of the Mostel from his father, only the Zero."

[irishgrl]

Thank GAWD Im not in acting~ seriously, those are a scream, I laffed in spite of myself.....which is a little upsetting because that sort of criticism is so cruel.

The British have a particularly nasty talent for insults, Ive seen it again and again.

[goldustsongbird]

Angela Lansbury lets "her eyes go either bulgily whirling . . . or so narrowly slitty that you couldn't slip a calling card through their openings."

Maggie Smith looks "like an upstart rooster."

Hey! I happen to like Angela and Maggie. Although I did laugh at the upstart rooster thing... I can see that. But they're both fine actresses. Someone jealous?

[seeker007nmss]

That's just his niche. He says these things because it is expected of him. Mr. Simon and 95% of the stars he comments on, won't even be remembered by the population as a whole, given a few generations. Except those actively interested, how many of the silent era stars, their careers and personal lives, are remembered by the general population? And even less of the critics of that time?

[David]

Originally Posted by seeker007nmss

That's just his niche. He says these things because it is expected of him. Mr. Simon and 95% of the stars he comments on, won't even be remembered by the population as a whole, given a few generations. Except those actively interested, how many of the silent era stars, their careers and personal lives, are remembered by the general population? And even less of the critics of that time?

I hope Simon's criticism lasts for hundreds of years, like Johnson's & Hazlitt's. I don't think it will last as long as Aristotle's, however.

The only film critic I can remember from the 1920s is . . . hmmm. . . well, Dwight Macdonald may have written a few film-related articles in the late 1920s. Does he count?

In the '30s, I remember Otis Ferguson & Robert Warshow.

For theater critics, I remember Agate in the 1940s in England & of course Agee in the 1940s in the United States.

[seeker007nmss]

Originally Posted by David

I hope Simon's criticism lasts for hundreds of years, like Johnson's & Hazlitt's. I don't think it will last as long as Aristotle's, however.

The only film critic I can remember from the 1920s is . . . hmmm. . . well, Dwight Macdonald may have written a few film-related articles in the late 1920s. Does he count?

In the '30s, I remember Otis Ferguson & Robert Warshow.

For theater critics, I remember Agate in the 1940s in England & of course Agee in the 1940s in the United States.

You remember, but then again, Ledgies aren't exactly "main stream". (in a good way)