Please say a prayer for me... - Page 4

estranged4life · #46 10-25-2008, 03:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Moz

Perhaps she fell asleep or just zoned off and went off the road?

Any way it happened, I am so sorry. At least you have the comfort in knowing you were on good terms with her during her last days. Not many people can say that!

Hang in there!

and he said very, very rarely do accidents occur when one traveling falls asleep and their car goes in a straight path for distances. He said almost every case he has investigated there is some proof of some attempt to rectify going off the road by applying brakes, oversteering, etc.

He said with a distance of 260' in a straight parallel to highway (50MPH - She usually sat cruise control when she drove to 55mph) before impact with the small residential culvert (The part of the highway she was on was a straight area) that she may have suffered a sudden death before impact.

She had started on a CPAP treatment about 2-3 weeks ago, and the M.E. said I should investigate into that:

CPAP

"Fixed-pressure CPAP (Continuous Positive Airway Pressure)
A continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP) machine is used mainly by patients for the treatment of sleep apnea at home. Obstructive sleep apnea occurs when the upper airway becomes narrow as the muscles relax naturally during sleep. This reduces oxygen in the blood and causes arousal from sleep. The CPAP machine stops this phenomenon by delivering a stream of compressed air via a hose to a nasal pillow, nose mask or full-face mask, splinting the airway (keeping it open under air pressure) so that unobstructed breathing becomes possible, reducing and/or preventing apneas and hypopneas. This has the additional benefit of reducing or eliminating the extremely loud snoring that sometimes accompanies sleep apnea.

The CPAP machine blows air at a prescribed pressure (also called the titrated pressure). The necessary pressure is usually determined by a sleep physician after review of a study supervised by a sleep technician during an overnight study (polysomnography) in a sleep laboratory. The titrated pressure is the pressure of air at which most (if not all) apneas and hypopneas have been prevented, and it is usually measured in centimetres of water (cm H2O). The pressure required by most patients with sleep apnea ranges between 6 and 14 cm H2O. A typical CPAP machine can deliver pressures between 4 and 20 cm H2O. More specialized units can deliver pressures up to 25 or 30 cm H2O.

CPAP treatment can be highly effective in treatment of obstructive sleep apnea. [1] For some patients, the improvement in the quality of sleep and quality of life due to CPAP treatment will be noticed after a single night's use. Often, the patient's sleep partner also benefits from markedly improved sleep quality, due to the amelioration of the patient's loud snoring.

Given that sleep apnea is a chronic health issue and doesn't go away, ongoing care is needed to maintain CPAP therapy. Based on the study of cognitive behavioral therapy (referenced above), ongoing chronic care management is the best way to help patients continue therapy by educating them on the health risks of sleep apnea and providing motivation and support."

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I'm hangin' in there as best I can...The info the M.E. gave me sat me at ease some.

I'd gladly give my life up if God gave her her life back...the world needs more nurses who are dedicated to their occupation of caring for people than caring about $$$$

Here is the link to her myspace page if one wants to leave condelences:

http://profile.myspace.com/177136002

BTFLCHLD · #47 10-25-2008, 03:12 AM

Brian, very good to speak with you again tonight. I am thankful that you spoke with the ME and have found a sense of ease this evening. You are not far from my mind, I am praying for you a lot. I will give you a call tomorrow when I return home. Please try to get some rest. Here for you...niki.

estranged4life · #48 10-25-2008, 03:23 AM

^^^ I just cannot sleep in this empty home, too many bad memories have happened to me within these walls...And no medicine can 'stifle all those screams'.

BTFLCHLD · #49 10-25-2008, 03:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by estranged4life

'stifle all those screams'.

I can only imagine, Brian. I am having a hard time sleeping too.

michelle2677 · #50 10-25-2008, 10:11 AM

brian, i am SO sorry about your loss. i know you feel alone, but you are not. just on the ledge you have so many people who care about you and want to make sure you're safe. please take it one day at a time. that's really all you can do. ask for help when you need it. i know the thought of finding out what exactly happened is keeping you focused right now, but when that goes away, please remember you are loved. i don't know why things like this happen, i honestly don't. i'm so sorry and please take care of yourself.

gldstwmn · #51 10-25-2008, 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by estranged4life

My sorrow is still here, but my anger is starting to boil.

This is a good sign. Keep hangin' in.

Zombie · #52 10-25-2008, 04:30 PM

I just read this whole thread with tears in my eyes. I've sent you a PM, as I imagine many others have done, but I just wanted to again say that if you need someone around that understands a bit of where you are right now, I'm here.

I also lost someone very dear to me, very suddenly, just as he & I were finally recovered from our breakup and back to being best friends. One moment he was there, and then he wasn't - I lost my best friend, but more importantly... my kids lost their father. He loved them so very, very much, and they just didn't get enough time together.

But I guess there's never enough time for anyone when it comes to this, is there?

There are no words of consolation that anyone can speak that make it hurt less. I find that, even a few years later, the thing that brings me the most comfort is just talking about him, even if all I do is briefly mention how he was overly fond of strolling around the house singing "Rock Lobster" in a ridiculously high-pitched voice for no apparent reason and usually at completely inopportune moments.

In time, you will find that you are better equipped to deal with the pain of it all, but it never goes away.

But even though it never goes away, with time you also realize that it's okay that it's there - because the pain is what allows you to always remember that she was real, how a great part of your life she was, and how much she meant to you. It's a testament to who she was, that her passing leaves such a gap, and though we all never want to have to deal with something like this, you realize that if it has to happen, then the pain you feel because of it is somehow its own blessing - it means that no matter how much time passes, she was monumental enough that you bear the imprint of her life on yours forever... and even though it seems like she's gone now, in that way, she never will be.

I don't know if there is a "reason" those we love die, but I am pretty sure that right there is the reason we live.

Please be kind to yourself.

-Annie

ontheEdgeof17 · #53 10-25-2008, 04:46 PM

You are in my thoughts. Sending you much, much love.

Steviefan49 · #54 10-25-2008, 06:46 PM

Hey Brian,

I'm SOOOOO very sorryand saddened to just be reading about this, and your loss of Debbie. My thoughts and prayers are definitely with you at this time. After losing a boyfriend I had been with for 11 years, I always knew he was with me, in my heart, and still is to this day. Just know that Debbie is with you, and will be with you always. I'm sending you lots of love and light in getting through this..

All my love to you,

Arlene

jannieC · #55 10-25-2008, 06:53 PM

Oh Brian, I don't even know what to say- this is just so tragic. You are very much in my thoughts and prayers. Please continue to reach out to those who love you; try not to isolate yourself too much right now.

CharmedHour · #56 10-25-2008, 06:57 PM

Brian, I am so sorry. This is so sad and so tragic. Hang in there. You are in my prayers. Sending you hugs... (((hug)))

estranged4life · #57 10-25-2008, 10:11 PM

Thanks y'all.

Here is the address of the funeral home that will be doing the services if you would like to send flowers:

Ray & Martha's Funeral Home
20 W.Main St.
Carnegie, OK 73015
580-654-1800