A Note From Bee

[Silver Springs]

I could have made this a "Prayer For Me" thread in reality, but that isn't my style. This, in later moments, is more of an apology really. To not only the friends I have on the board, but the board at large.

I'm sure alot of you have noticed somewhat of a change in my personality. Yes I was eccentric and "shiny happy" Bee when I first joined up until a small while ago. But recently she's retreated into a much more reserved and sheltered self. I have Depression, and so this isn't an uncommon thing to happen to me. I just want you all to know that I'm truelly sorry for my more depressing and, as some would say, self centred posts brushing over my problems while at the same time lamenting them. I'm not going to give a running commentary on my personal life in this post. I don't feel it fair to myself, people reading this or anybody else for me to share my personal (Home, University) with the world as it is my cross to bear. I'm trying my best to cope with my Demons without my usual tactics that I know are unhealthy for me. I just want to thank you all for your patience and understanding. Especially considering recent events in a thread I created which added less than favourable drama to the chit chat forum. I do feel hugely responcible for it considering my personal links to the member in question, and so each person who got themselves involved in it and upset because of it: I truelly am sorry. I have not seen nor spoken with the woman since the altercations and I'm hoping our paths shant cross until I'm at least at a better place where I can cope with an altercation that isn't behind a computer screen. At the moment I'm too fragile for that.

Once again, thank you whole heartedly for your patience. I'm working to try and get the Bee you used to know back. At the moment all she wants to do is sleep and forget the world. But I'll try to tempt her back with sweets and promises of a cuddle from Lindsey (lie but a girl can dream).

-Bee-

[bluefox4000]

It's ok. I know depression very very well. So I know how hard it is. I struggled with it for years and years. Still have my bouts. Hang in there though. It'll get better

Mick

[estranged4life]

Originally Posted by Silver Springs

I have Depression, and so this isn't an uncommon thing to happen to me.
-Bee-

apologize, especially if you're suffering from depression. I'm battling it and I am coming out of the fog back into the light of normalcy (or if one has a sense of humor for Mel Brooks movie, back into being my usual "Abbie Normal" self ) so just hang tight and don't give up hope.

[Nikolaj]

Nice note, Silver Springs Bee!
Fuhgeddaboudit!
There have been many depression conversations in Chit Chat, I've awoken to hit 'delete' more times than I may even recall.
Sometimes the late night typing helps. You know John Lennon sang 'whatever gets you through the night'-- sometimes it's The Ledge Chit Chat!
This reminds me of Truman Capote's so-funny quote about Jacqueline Sussann- and yes; it was a bit before my time.
Capote said of her: "That's not writing! That's typing." It's even funnier if you can imitate Truman or know of his voice.
I'm not implying 'that's typing' about you, at all.
Just know em-bare-assing things have happened here before. So, 'bee' cheerful when you want- as Stevie wrote and has never stopped singing, 'it's only right that you should play the way you feel it' and she was right. It's fine.

[holidayroad]

Originally Posted by Silver Springs

I could have made this a "Prayer For Me" thread in reality, but that isn't my style. This, in later moments, is more of an apology really. To not only the friends I have on the board, but the board at large.

I'm sure alot of you have noticed somewhat of a change in my personality. Yes I was eccentric and "shiny happy" Bee when I first joined up until a small while ago. But recently she's retreated into a much more reserved and sheltered self. I have Depression, and so this isn't an uncommon thing to happen to me. I just want you all to know that I'm truelly sorry for my more depressing and, as some would say, self centred posts brushing over my problems while at the same time lamenting them. I'm not going to give a running commentary on my personal life in this post. I don't feel it fair to myself, people reading this or anybody else for me to share my personal (Home, University) with the world as it is my cross to bear. I'm trying my best to cope with my Demons without my usual tactics that I know are unhealthy for me. I just want to thank you all for your patience and understanding. Especially considering recent events in a thread I created which added less than favourable drama to the chit chat forum. I do feel hugely responcible for it considering my personal links to the member in question, and so each person who got themselves involved in it and upset because of it: I truelly am sorry. I have not seen nor spoken with the woman since the altercations and I'm hoping our paths shant cross until I'm at least at a better place where I can cope with an altercation that isn't behind a computer screen. At the moment I'm too fragile for that.

Once again, thank you whole heartedly for your patience. I'm working to try and get the Bee you used to know back. At the moment all she wants to do is sleep and forget the world. But I'll try to tempt her back with sweets and promises of a cuddle from Lindsey (lie but a girl can dream).

-Bee-

Like I said before, you don't have to be 'shiny happy Bee' for all of us to like you. You have depression and that is a medical condition. You don't have to be sorry for it. It isn't your fault. It's something that you don't have to go through alone.
What happened in that thread the other day is Definitely not your fault. Some cold-hearted jerk came here and showed her true colors. No matter how she felt about you, it was wrong for her to come here and try to harass you. I truly hope you never see her again and if you do, you should look right through her and walk on because someone like that doesn't deserve to have you speak to her.
I hope you will let us here at The Ledge continue to help you out. We really do care.

[vivfox]

All my life I've heard people say that the most tortured souls are the best artists.

[DefDumbandBlond]

You don't have to be sorry about how you really feel, and you definitely don't need to be sorry or take responsibility for what your idiotic 'friend' said. We are all here for you of course no matter what, so hang in there, things will get better.