Fm Band To Attend Funeral

[iamnotafraid]

Originally Posted by Villavic

I agree. I wouldn't use the phrase "should go...". Let's think also about what the family wants.

^This is so true. If somehow all the members of the Mac
showed up it could become a circus.

And I might be the only one who feels this way. But I
find no comfort when friends and family show up at
funerals. When my father passed in 2004, he had well
over 800 people show up at the wake. It's funny when
people are grieving the most, they are the ones who
have to put on a show for everyone else. As a Christian
maybe I shouldn't feel this way. But I found no comfort
at all during the wake and funeral. Or even during the
days and days of visits from friends and loved ones.

So I think sending a card and expressing your condolences
is enough. Unless there's something you can actually do for
the family without intruding on their time of grief and sorrow.

[holidayroad]

Originally Posted by iamnotafraid

And I might be the only one who feels this way. But I
find no comfort when friends and family show up at
funerals. When my father passed in 2004, he had well
over 800 people show up at the wake. It's funny when
people are grieving the most, they have to put on a show for everyone else. As a Christian
maybe I shouldn't feel this way. But I found no comfort
at all during the wake and funeral. Or even during the
days and days of visits from friends and loved ones.

So I think sending a card and expressing your condolences
is enough. Unless there's something you can actually do for
the family without intruding on their time of grief and sorrow.

I agree with you. When my husband's mother died, he and his sisters felt very distraught at having to comfort all of the family and friends at the wake/funeral when they were the one who needed comforted. It made a hard time for the family even harder

[Macfanforever]

I feel its up to them .if they can make it.I already experienced 4 funerals in the family.My dad was the latest one last February.Some people did show up to pay respects and some did not show.I did not hold anything against the friends that did not show up.

Some of them I did see months after the loss did say I'm sorry about your loss of your love one.I tell them thank you.

[iamnotafraid]

Originally Posted by holidayroad

I agree with you. When my husband's mother died, he and his sisters felt very distraught at having to comfort all of the family and friends at the wake/funeral when they were the one who needed comforted. It made a hard time for the family even harder

I'm glad someone understands. It's almost funny
these rituals we have. It's time we re-think the wake
and funeral one.

[Villavic]

Originally Posted by iamnotafraid

I'm glad someone understands. It's almost funny
these rituals we have. .

I agree too. In Peru is a must to serve coffee and cookies at a funeral, and relatives have to be in charge of all that. And if you are not ready with the coffee, they worry and think "what will they say??"
I always found it ridiculous.

[CADreaming]

Originally Posted by iamnotafraid

I'm glad someone understands. It's almost funny
these rituals we have. It's time we re-think the wake
and funeral one.

But, what about all the other non-family who loved them too or were touched by their life? They don't get the chance to grieve or pay respects.

[Villavic]

Originally Posted by CADreaming

But, what about all the other non-family who loved them too or were touched by their life? They don't get the chance to grieve or pay respects.

That's fine I think. But in Peru sometimes the funerals got distorted when relatives, as holidayroad said, felt very distraught at having to comfort all friends, and not only to comfort but also serve. In some neighborhoods men found an opportunity even to drink liquor for free!! Specially when funerals are done at the late's home, not a funeral home.

Ok maybe I'm running out of the topic. But thinking about Bob relatives, or any public figure, I guess relatives got stressed because of the media cover when it should be a private thing.
You have a point, no doubt. For example thousands of people wanted to pay respect to Princess Diana (something the Queen couldn't understand), but I don't know if the family really wanted that ceremony with live broadcasts, the boys walking behind the coffin, etc. Ok Bob's funeral is far smaller, but who knows what the family wants. Maybe paying respect thru a webpage is just ok for them and will appreciate enough. Who knows.

[iamnotafraid]

Originally Posted by CADreaming

But, what about all the other non-family who loved them too or were touched by their life? They don't get the chance to grieve or pay respects.

I think you can pay your respects at the gravesite.
I personally find more peace there in private than
I ever have at a funeral home.

I've said words there that was between them, myself
and God. And while I don't believe the person that's
passed away can hear you, it still gives a bit of closure
to me at least.

If their soul has made it to Heaven, I can't imagine them
looking down on this world as it is now. There's just too
much pain and sadness. The comfort is in knowing that
we have the opportunity to see them again.