Let Us Now Take Time To Mourn the Loss...

[dissention]

...of Bennifer. I know it's going to be hard to get over this split, but I am certain we will all persevere. It may take lots of strength to emerge from your beds in the morning, but I have faith in us all.

And now, the end is here;
And so we face the last tabloid story.
My friends, I’ll say it clear,
I'll mourn this loss, of which I’m certain.

They shared a life that was full.
They bombed every movie theatre;
But more, much more than this,
They did it the Bennifer way.

Regrets, they have none for you;
But then again, no reason for a Gigli mention.
They did what they had to do
And saw it through with low box office...estimations.

They planned each charted course;
Each careful step along California thruway,
But more, much more than this,
They did it the celebrity way.

Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew
When Affleck shot down J. Ho's diva-tude.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
They ate it up and spit it out.
They faced it all and but never stood very tall;
They did it their way.

We've loved, we've laughed and cried.
We've had our fill; our share of heckling.
And now, as that ugly match-up subsides,
We find it all so amusing.

To think they didn't do much at all;
Except cheat us out of money,
No, oh no not them,
They did it the Hollywood way.

[GardenStateGirlie]

I cannot stand them...i'm tired of them being in the news every five seconds. She? Is a bitch on wheels and he's an ignorant ass. They filmed Jersey Girl in the town next to mine and were less than pleasant intruders

[dissention]

Originally posted by GardenStateGirlie
I cannot stand them...i'm tired of them being in the news every five seconds. She? Is a bitch on wheels and he's an ignorant ass. They filmed Jersey Girl in the town next to mine and were less than pleasant intruders

I have a friend who worked at MTV and he interviewed Affleck and said some nasty things about him. He says Affleck is very aloof and weird and that he gives people weird looks at the slightest provocation. He also said that he acts like a diva if something isn't perfect.

Want some more insider gossip?

[GardenStateGirlie]

Originally posted by dissention
I have a friend who worked at MTV and he interviewed Affleck and said some nasty things about him. He says Affleck is very aloof and weird and that he gives people weird looks at the slightest provocation. He also said that he acts like a diva if something isn't perfect.

Want some more insider gossip?

His refusal to put his cigarette out (he was on school property) and his response to my uncle (who had asked him) was horrible. My uncle can go on for at least an hour about those two...he's not a fan...definately not after that incident went down...lol. I imagine your friends experience wasn't so different

[dissention]

Originally posted by GardenStateGirlie
His refusal to put his cigarette out (he was on school property) and his response to my uncle (who had asked him) was horrible. My uncle can go on for at least an hour about those two...he's not a fan...definately not after that incident went down...lol

What happened?! The more I hear, the more of a prick he sounds like.

More gossip:

Enrique Iglesias was going quite bald and that's why he went through that damn beanie phase. Eventually, he got plugs.

Remember when Brandy was having her baby and turned it into a series for MTV? Well, the guy on film that she claimed was the father isn't the father; he was paid to play the father. Brandy supposedly slept around and doesn't know who the real father is.

[GypsySorcerer]

I'm so sick of them. As the saying goes, Ben Affleck was put on Earth to make Matt Damon look like the smart one.


~Krista

[Merf]

Originally posted by dissention
What happened?! The more I hear, the more of a prick he
Remember when Brandy was having her baby and turned it into a series for MTV? Well, the guy on film that she claimed was the father isn't the father; he was paid to play the father. Brandy supposedly slept around and doesn't know who the real father is.

OHMAHGUH!!! I never heard that!!!!??!?!?!??!

WTF!!! That's the worst thing I've heard in a while! That's horrible! And I actually sat through 6 episodes of that crap! And weren't they married or something??

I guess that's why they divorced shortly after the baby was born. Poor child. Hasn't anyone ever heard of a DNA test? I had no idea Brandy was such a... well, you guys know.

[GardenStateGirlie]

Well, my uncle said, "excuse me, would you mind putting that out? If not, you're going to probably have to pay a fine since you're on school grounds."

Ben's reply, "I'll pay the f*ckin fine..." (turns to his friends, laughs, walks into his trailer).

[GardenStateGirlie]

Originally posted by Merf
I had no idea Brandy was such a... well, you guys know.

I believe the term you're looking for? Cutty Hor...

[gldstwmn]

Wow. I thought someone died. It was only a matter of time before this happened. He was never going to marry her anyway.

[gldstwmn]

Originally posted by GypsySorcerer


I'm so sick of them. As the saying goes, Ben Affleck was put on Earth to make Matt Damon look like the smart one.


~Krista

He actually is smart. He went to Harvard and studied film. His family is not wealthy.

[dissention]

Originally posted by Merf
OHMAHGUH!!! I never heard that!!!!??!?!?!??!

WTF!!! That's the worst thing I've heard in a while! That's horrible! And I actually sat through 6 episodes of that crap! And weren't they married or something??

I guess that's why they divorced shortly after the baby was born. Poor child. Hasn't anyone ever heard of a DNA test? I had no idea Brandy was such a... well, you guys know.

I don't believe they were married. I think it's rather funny, actually. As is Enrique and his plugs.

[dissention]

Originally posted by GardenStateGirlie
Well, my uncle said, "excuse me, would you mind putting that out? If not, you're going to probably have to pay a fine since you're on school grounds."

Ben's reply, "I'll pay the f*ckin fine..." (turns to his friends, laughs, walks into his trailer).

Like I said, he seems like a prick.

[Mad4stevie]

Wow - I didn't hear about this. No television watching today . . .

What is the scoop? Who dumped who?

I will be glad that this is over - obviously something was very wrong a LONG time ago.

I personally don't think that you can ever really recover in a relationship after calling off a wedding. And I guess I should know - I called off mine with a week to go!

Never regretted the decision - EVER.

[darklinensuit]

Originally posted by dissention
...of Bennifer. I know it's going to be hard to get over this split, but I am certain we will all persevere. It may take lots of strength to emerge from your beds in the morning, but I have faith in us all.

And now, the end is here;
And so we face the last tabloid story.
My friends, I’ll say it clear,
I'll mourn this loss, of which I’m certain.

They shared a life that was full.
They bombed every movie theatre;
But more, much more than this,
They did it the Bennifer way.

Regrets, they have none for you;
But then again, no reason for a Gigli mention.
They did what they had to do
And saw it through with low box office...estimations.

They planned each charted course;
Each careful step along California thruway,
But more, much more than this,
They did it the celebrity way.

Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew
When Affleck shot down J. Ho's diva-tude.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
They ate it up and spit it out.
They faced it all and but never stood very tall;
They did it their way.

We've loved, we've laughed and cried.
We've had our fill; our share of heckling.
And now, as that ugly match-up subsides,
We find it all so amusing.

To think they didn't do much at all;
Except cheat us out of money,
No, oh no not them,
They did it the Hollywood way.

And when he walked out on Jen
After such a dull year
He looked up and saw her
He was standing with that blank face
She was hanging out of Greendress
Everything was the same
Except her acting was transparent

In that very moment
Ben and Jen were silent
So we might all read real news
For the first time in years
Everyone was smiling
Since the break-up was apparent
And her dress was tight and slinky
With the weight of her rear

And then I see Gigli videos packed on shelves in the store
Not showing any talent
And the couple is no more


- Jake