Dead whale explodes (discretion advised)

[darklinensuit]

Originally posted by GardenStateGirlie
Wow, i'm shocked! You've had us all fooled thinking you were a teacher but in actuality, you've been crossing the globe for years "experiencing" whale penis. Maybe the next one will be more impressive for you. Happy hunting!!

None of them compares to the one that came in from Jersey for the Mac's Philly show. That one was what, five foot six?

- Jake

[GardenStateGirlie]

Originally posted by darklinensuit
None of them compares to the one that came in from Jersey for the Mac's Philly show. That one was what, five foot six?

- Jake

Ah yes...if all "whales" could look like me....too bad I had no penis...

:goes back to loving to hate you, as always, already in progress:

[darklinensuit]

Originally posted by GardenStateGirlie
Ah yes...if all "whales" could look like me....too bad I had no penis...

:goes back to loving to hate you, as always, already in progress:

I don't want to know the reasons why...
I just want you to feel fine

(If hating me is wrong, you don't wanna be right... )

(And I wasn't calling you the whole whale... )

- Jake

[GardenStateGirlie]

Originally posted by darklinensuit
I don't want to know the reasons why...
I just want you to feel fine

(If hating me is wrong, you don't wanna be right... )

(And I wasn't calling you the whole whale... )

- Jake

LMAO! That's even worse!!! You're soooo **** list'd!!! I'm not so sharp at 3am evidently...you'll have to cut me some slack

[darklinensuit]

Originally posted by GardenStateGirlie
LMAO! That's even worse!!! You're soooo **** list'd!!! I'm not so sharp at 3am evidently...you'll have to cut me some slack

Hey, if you're gonna say I'm looking for them, all's fair in the Love & War Mix-Down.
(Certainly one of our more interesting tangents. )

And for the record, the CORRECT time is 2:00. (We also have the correct weather. Just not the correct ex-governor.)

- Jake

[GardenStateGirlie]

Originally posted by darklinensuit
Hey, if you're gonna say I'm looking for them, all's fair in the Love & War Mix-Down.
(Certainly one of our more interesting tangents. )

And for the record, the CORRECT time is 2:00. (We also have the correct weather. Just not the correct ex-governor.)

- Jake

I had it coming, I had it coming, I only have myself to blame.... (you've never seen Chicago, you won't get that, but that is where it's from)

Definately one of the more interesting tangents.

This calls for a moment of silence for the dead whale....and it's penis....


......


No, it's 3:34 am. Says me. THAT is the correct time.

[darklinensuit]

Originally posted by GardenStateGirlie
I had it coming, I had it coming, I only have myself to blame.... (you've never seen Chicago, you won't get that, but that is where it's from)

I've lived in Chicago, and I know how to blame you, so I'm covered, thanks.


Getting back to the thread, I admit it's not as bad as the whale in many ways (though in terms of animal cruelty it's worse), but before I judge the guys for going to visit that thing, I have to remember that we're the country that gave the world that goat/unicorn story twenty years ago. Anybody else remember that?

- Jake

[GardenStateGirlie]

Originally posted by darklinensuit
I have to remember that we're the country that gave the world that goat/unicorn story twenty years ago. Anybody else remember that?

- Jake

Nope. Do tell.

[darklinensuit]

Originally posted by GardenStateGirlie
Nope. Do tell.

The circus opened, publicizing that it had a unicorn when the thing was really a goat with a surgically grafted horn. The press made this the top story & animal rights groups demanded to see the poor creature. The whole thing was farcical. The ASPCA reps in the audience said it looked like a goat with a horn, so, as Linda Ellerbee describes it:

"Naturally, the A.S.P.C.A. demanded to examine the goat, and, naturally, the circus said that was not possible since it was a unicorn and not a goat. The A.S.P.C.A. winked at the audience to this television passion play, and asked the cicus where it had found this 'unicorn' The circus told the A.S.P.C.A. it really couldn't say; the unicorn just sort of showed up one day.

" Things were cooking now. Local television stations hovered, ready, one felt, to interrupt regularly scheduled programming if an 'exclusive' could be guaranteed. One night, on the six o'clock news, a reporter interviewed an eight-year-old girl who stated with authority that it could NOT be a unicorn because everyone knew a unicorn was a HORSE, for heaven's sake, and not a goat. How dumb could you get?

"A series of interviews with men and women 'on the street' followed. Was the child perhaps right? Did it have to be a horse to be a unicorn? Could a goat be one?

" Think of it. Full-grown human beings appeared on television to debate how an animal THAT DID NOT EXIST should look, properly speaking. Finally, as you would expect, the federal government was called to render judgment. Some GS-12 from the Department of Agriculture was made to fly up from Washington and examine the beast. He announced afterward that the animal was in good health and, as best he could tell, reasonably content. It was, however, a goat - UNLESS YOU WANTED TO CALL IT A UNICORN. Now, that is what I call taking a firm stand, and I sure hope the fellow intends to leave Washington and run for the Senate sometime soon, providing no eight-year-old girls take him on in the primary.

"During the course of the Great New York Unicorn Scare, the circus took out advertisements in THE NEW YORK TIMES, advising all citizens that the fogies of this world were once again out to destroy magic, Santa Claus, and the Constitution. To no one's surprise, the circus, with its unicorn, quickly became the hottest ticket in town.

" Then the circus moved on, its purse overflowing, its reputation renewed, its very case proven once more."




- Jake

[tommer]

it's not like i don't like animals (i hate only dogs and pandas really), but i don't think there's any difference between a whale to a chicken or the next cow to be eaten at mcdonald's and provide us all with cool leather jackets in the process.

i reckon that an animal who's death resulted so much amusement for so many people, didn't exactly die for no reason.

[darklinensuit]

Originally posted by tommer
it's not like i don't like animals (i hate only dogs and pandas really), but i don't think there's any difference between a whale to a chicken or the next cow to be eaten at mcdonald's and provide us all with cool leather jackets in the process.

i reckon that an animal who's death resulted so much amusement for so many people, didn't exactly die for no reason.

Excuse me while I spit out my McWhaleBurger and meditate on your comments.

- Jake

[darklinensuit]

BTW, I have to ask. What's with the panda hatred?

- Jake

[DrummerDeanna]

Originally posted by darklinensuit
BTW, I have to ask. What's with the panda hatred?

- Jake

LOL...I was wondering that myself, I've never known soemone to hate Pandas...I love pandas,though I've never actually met one

[darklinensuit]

Originally posted by DrummerDeanna
LOL...I was wondering that myself, I've never known soemone to hate Pandas...I love pandas,though I've never actually met one

And before anybody bashes you for that, I'll add that I love Stevie though I've never actually met one.

- Jake

[GardenStateGirlie]

Originally posted by darklinensuit
"During the course of the Great New York Unicorn Scare, the circus took out advertisements in THE NEW YORK TIMES, advising all citizens that the fogies of this world were once again out to destroy magic, Santa Claus, and the Constitution. To no one's surprise, the circus, with its unicorn, quickly became the hottest ticket in town.

Wow.