[Jondalar]

Originally Posted by Netter75

Here are my unsolicited first impressions of the song:

1. The Production:
Props to whoever produced this. Similar to her other stream-of-conscious songs (most notably Mabel Normand), I can't imagine how daunting of task it was to make a song out of the source lyrics. They did a great job pulling everything they could have out of this song! I like the drumming and the piano a lot. Even if they aren't particularly noteworthy, they fit the song well and provide strong support for the message.

2. The Lyrics:
The lyrics are sometimes interesting but mostly incoherent. That might be what she's going for- a series of vague, barely connected lines and events. It relies on dream logic, I get it. It definitely could have used another rewrite to eliminate some of the awkward passages and trim some of the fat. Lines like "singing songs, doing benefits" are awkward, same with "the dress came across the Persian carpet". It is possible to evoke imagery without just bluntly describing the room, Stevie. Some lines are better: "Into my heart, I have a dream, And a door opened, I turned to face the music" and "All in shadow, all before me, overwhelmed by destiny" in particular. Overall, I find the lyrics much more difficult to connect with than similar songs like Mabel Normand and Illume.

3. The vocals:
Her voice on this is not going to be everyone's cup of tea but it doesn't phase me. It's much stronger than I was expecting, and on par with Mabel Normand or You Can't Fix This. Love her energy towards the end of the song.

4. The message:
I was not very convinced by the song at all- I felt nothing for it... until the last two minutes or so. It sort of tied the whole song together. Her end-takeaway from her dream is summarized with the line "don't forget what we were fighting for", referencing the efforts of all of the peaceful leaders. I love that message, its so timely in this period of horrible unrest but its not preachy or overtly political.

5. The most appealing thing about this song is its earnestness. Despite the clumsiness, you can tell that *Stevie* felt this was a beautiful story that needed to be told. It doesn't feel like a bid for attention- if it was it would have more direct references to the current climate. That doesn't mean its objectively great, but I can tell her heart was in it and that makes a huge difference in my appreciation for the song. Despite a rocky start, she was resonating with me by the end of the song when she was belting "set them free" and repeating the chorus.

So overall, I think the song is strong for her latter day efforts. The individual components are not particularly impressive (and even sometimes embarrassing in the lyrics) but the song achieved what it set out to do, and I'd call it a worthy addition to her catalog. I'll be curious to see if I'll warm to the lyrics over time like I did with Illume.

Sidenote: I love the single artwork

This is such a well thought out critique. Thank you. I agree with a lot of it.