For Silver Springs, Georgie, and Dani -
Alas, it doesn't actually matter what you look like when you're out and about - some men will always think that just the fact that you've had the temerity to both leave the house AND be female gives them free reign to say/do whatever they want.
If someone is making you uncomfortable, that is not okay and you need to let them know it's not okay. I used to sort of just take it, but when I was about 16, a man literally physically dragged me out of my friend's car window while we were sitting in a parking lot in front of a store, and no one helped me - not even my friend. I got away from him and dealt him a good kick in the balls before I ran into the store, but that situation scared me so badly that I decided the next time ANYONE said or did anything I didn't like, I was going to let them know in no uncertain terms.
So when a guy is an ass to me, I'm now an ass back. And if I see a guy making another woman uncomfortable, but she's not sticking up for herself for whatever reason, you can bet your ass I'm right there telling the guy to f*ck off. More often than not, it works like a charm, and I think it's because many women don't do or say anything back to them when they behave like that.
Example: Saturday night, I am standing in line at the gas station by myself (Cute Guitar Boy stayed in the car to keep an eye on the kiddos), and some dude in front of me starts leering, and then informs me that he just got off work at the strip club. Where he's a stripper. "Which means naked," he says.
"How nice for you," I deadpan.
"You should come out some time, I'll give you a dance," he says.
"Oh man! Thanks for the invite! I have to go see the doctor tomorrow about this whole syphilis of the gums thing I've got going on, but if it clears up by next weekend, I will totally be there!" says me.
He stopped talking after that.
If the situation is more serious than something like that, though - then feel free to say, "NO," or "LEAVE ME ALONE," or "GET AWAY FROM ME," or "DO NOT TOUCH ME." And if the guy doesn't stop, then you make more noise. Use your best judgment, of course, but I find that a little intimidation or fighting back goes a long way. Most of these idiots aren't used to anyone saying anything back, so it often startles them into shutting up and going away.
And if someone grabs you like I got grabbed back in the day, then, if you can, you fight like hell and give him a reason to NEVER do something like that again.
Sorry for the rant, but I
hate that crap.
